[FIN] Playing Pretend

[TawnyAngel]

If Abel wanted a hug he certainly wasn't going to object. "Yes, that sounds good to me," Zevran agreed as he leaned into the embrace and wrapped his arms around Abel's waist. "Maybe another coffee? Though I suppose they will only have cheap instant stuff, so perhaps something else." He understood Abel's aversion to terrible coffee and somewhat shared it himself of late though he supposed to be fair to the hospital their coffee hadn't been all that bad, just not as good as Abel's coffee or a nice restaurant's offering.

Really though he wanted a proper drink, several shots of something potent to put reality out of focus preferably.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

With a warm smile Abel wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, one around his waist and the other around his shoulders, and kissed his forehead. "Coffee's good, we can get some coffee. If you want better coffee I don't mind running out to get some," he offered, his thumb rubbing idle circles over Zevran's shoulder as the elevator ascended. Coffee would be nice, but so would just sitting and cuddling with his boyfriend. His adorable, precious sweetheart of a boyfriend that he'd come so frighteningly close to losing, that now seemed so distracted because of what happened.  

[TawnyAngel]

As Abel rubbed gentle circles on his shoulder Zevran sighed softly and closed his eyes. "I would not send you back out just for that. Besides, I would rather have your company than coffee." As the lift dinged to announce it had reached their floor Zevran gave Abel a squeeze and then broke the embrace. "Perhaps some tea instead, their tea is probably tolerable," he suggested as they stepped out into the hallway.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"I'm better than coffee," the taller blond replied confidently with a smirky smile as he fell into step with Zevran, leaving his arm around his waist both for contact and to offer support if he needed or wanted, "and I'm more tolerable than tea."

It was something of a relief when the lock to their door clicked open and they stepped inside the hotel room. Privacy, a place to sit and rest and relax, where they could focus on each other... and perhaps the things that had been bothering them both. ...in a couple minutes. Zevran probably wouldn't appreciate being blindsided with that subject when they'd barely stepped in the door.  

[TawnyAngel]

"It's true, you are," Zevran agreed with a soft chuckle as they entered their room. He realised then that he hadn't really checked how secure it was earlier but did it matter? Who would be out there planning to harm either of them now?

Zevran gave Abel a last squeeze before pulling away from him and heading over to the bed, where he sat down gratefully. "What is there to drink?" he asked as he kicked his shoes off and then swung his legs up onto the bed so that he could lean back against the pillows; this did not make the exit wounds on his back very happy but he ignored them, it was more relaxing than sitting upright.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Abel chuckled as well as he kicked his shoes off by the door and stepped further inside, where he deposited his light hoodie on one of the nearby chairs. "Uhh, not a whole lot," he admitted as he rubbed the back of his neck and cast around the room, as if some different beverages would jump out from behind some furniture. "Water, coffee, and... that's about it." Beer too, of course, but that wasn't an option when he'd taken his medication. "I think we're near a vending machine so I can go grab you a soda if you'd like instead, but that's about it for drink choices," he finished as he padded over to sit on the edge of the bed beside his boyfriend.  

[TawnyAngel]

Zevran shook his head and then started to smirk again. "Humm, no I will pass on drinks I think; I will settle for curling up with a tall cool blond, if he would like to do so?" He couldn't imagine Abel saying no, they had come here to spend time together alone after all.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Said taller blond's lips curved into a smirk. "He would love to do so," he said as he turned and knelt on the bed - the better to lean over and kiss the tip of Zevran's nose - before he flopped himself down beside him and leaned back against the pillows. A moment later his knees rose and moved to make room as one hand curled loosely around Zevran's arm. "There's a better seat here for you, if you'd like it." Oh yes, he was definitely up for cuddling with his boyfriend, and since sitting in his lap generally put too much pressure on his injuries, sitting in front of him would probably be more comfortable.  

[TawnyAngel]

Abel always looked so... so happy when he suggested something affectionate. It made him happy too, of course it did, but it surprised him all the time that Abel was so keen. It surprised him more lately than it had before and it made him feel guilty, and vaguely as though he was tricking Abel somehow.

"I think I could be persuaded." Zevran put on a smile and carefully shifted around into the better seat he had been offered. "Mmmh, yes this is acceptable," he purred as he leaned back again.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Why did Zevran keep looking so distracted, so distant? Like he was somewhere else?

Probably because his mind was somewhere else.

Either way Abel refrained from commenting on that just yet in favor of wrapping his arms around Zevran's waist and burying his face in his love's hair with a contented sigh. "Only acceptable? I suppose that's a step up from just tolerable, so I shouldn't complain."  

[TawnyAngel]

Zevran closed his eyes and swallowed hard. This was perfect - perfect besides the pain, which wasn't important - and he knew he didn't deserve it, shouldn't have it, felt sick and guilty that he did. And yet he was still glad to be here? The dissonance tore and churned and laughed at him and he had no idea how to deal with it other than to press it down as he always had any feeling he didn't like or that was just too complicated.

He exhaled slowly and laid his hands over Abel's. "Te amo." He should say more. "Ah... thank you. For this trip. It is nice to get away, just the two of us. A shame I am so boring at present! But it is still good."  

[BlackFireKitsune]

When Zevran finally replied, it was with something he expected and something he did not. He knew his first instinct, of course, but... "Te amo," he said instead of using English. Zevran seemed to appreciate it more when he used Spanish. With another contented sigh he lifted his head a bit to kiss Zev's hair. "You're welcome. And it is nice, it's much more.. peaceful. Peaceful and quiet, and you know I love you the same whether you're boring or exciting. Mmh, you have seemed more distracted lately," he noted before hesitating. Should he...? Shouldn't he...? No, he wouldn't get a much better lead-in than that. "Is it because you've been thinking of what happened?"  

[TawnyAngel]

Because of what happened?

Zevran tensed, the change would have been imperceptible to anyone he wasn't leaning directly against.

"What is the point of thinking about it?" he asked casually. "We survived, that is what matters yes?" They and none of the others. Not those Taliesen had drawn to Kodo with owed favours, not the one who seemed to have followed for affection, and not the children who didn't even have their first marks. Not Taliesen himself. "There is no point dwelling on it." So he told himself far too often.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

If he'd had any doubts whether or not what happened bothered Zev, the way he tensed at the subject swept them away in an instant. Well now that he knew for sure, how was he going to handle this conversation he'd started?

Abel considered his position carefully - very carefully - as he pressed a thoughtful kiss to his boyfriend's head. "There's a lot of reasons why you should think about it, actually. I've been... avoiding talking about it much because I knew how much it must've upset you, but it is important to talk about. And before you try to tell me otherwise," he added promptly as he gently linked his fingers with Zevran's, "I'll give you at least one reason why. Three of them got away - both of the apprentices, and.. Luciana I think her name was - and while I've been assuming no one else will come after you, because even if any of them did care I'd expect they think you died too, I don't know that for sure. You'd know that better than I would, I think - or at least the Crows themselves, if not those three specifically - so I've wanted to ask, but..."  

[TawnyAngel]

Alive.

Zevran's breath caught and held still, the knowledge pulling the air in his lungs away from him as suddenly and surely as a blow to the gut. "The kids aren't dead?" he asked and he was glad Abel couldn't see his face. Unfortunately there was little he could do about his voice; it came out tense, anxious, and he supposed the language he had used gave away a lot as well. They were apprentice assassins but they were also children, only in their mid teens by the look of them. They hadn't deserved to die on Taliesen's order.