OoOoO
Clouds were gathering overhead as they arrived back in Konoha. Conversation had been sparse on the return leg of their mission, which suited Naruto's mood. That was probably just as well, given the pace the two Sannin set. Even Shizune seemed a little short of breath as they descended from the tree-line at the gates to Konoha.
The Chuunin on gate duty snapped to attention immediately. "Jiraiya-sama, the Hokage requests that you report to his office immediately."
Ero-sennin just nodded dourly as they passed. Tsunade didn't even acknowledge the guards. Naruto knew from her reluctance that something was wrong with her… or at least with her past. He just hoped the Old Man could talk some sense into her.
Naruto felt many eyes upon him as they made their way to the Hokage's tower. It was a little unnerving at first, until he remembered Sensei's lessons and tried to view the situation from their point of view. The death of a jonin in a public place wouldn't have been kept secret for long, especially if she was going to have a public funeral as her rank required.
From his peripheral vision, Naruto noticed that most of the scrutiny seemed to come from older villagers and shinobi, ones who likely knew he was a Jinchuuriki. So they were watching to see how he reacted. Maybe they were worried he would lash out in anger at Sensei's death.
Naruto almost snorted in amusement. Like he would demean her teachings by ignoring them now. He kept his face as impassive as possible. He would do his duty and make her proud. Wherever she was now.
He could do no less.
OoOoO
Jiraiya lingered at the back of the group. He didn't really think Tsunade would cut and run now – if nothing else curiosity would keep her for a little while. Instead, he wanted to keep an eye on the kids without being obvious about it.
The Hyuuga's body language and posture were a little off. Given her reactions when the Hokage announced her stay with Kurenai was coming to an end that was no surprise.
The Aburame was as impassive as any of his clan when in public view. He was a little surprised to see a slightly sarcastic temperament displayed in private with his teammates, but he figured no one could remain stoic all of the time. He remembered putting together a dossier on the boy's mother before Shibi returned to Konoha from his posting. It hadn't looked like it at first, but her influence still might breathe some life into the Aburames before that emotionless exterior they cultivated made them truly inhuman.
It was Naruto that was the real surprise. After his rage at Kurenai's death nearly unleashed the Kyuubi on Itachi, Jiraiya wasn't expecting the boy to hold it together this well in the village. Instead of glaring or even visibly grieving, he was just as impassive as the Aburame.
Rather than being impressed, this made the Sannin a little worried as they entered the tower. He wondered if the boy's… former… teacher had the opportunity to speak to him about dealing with loss. Some might admire Naruto's ability to keep things bottled up, but Jiraiya considered them fools. He needed to talk to him, and soon.
Unfortunately, that wasn't to be. The Old Man looked like utter hell, and Tsunade looked like she wanted to throw everyone out of his office so she could examine him immediately.
"Team Eight, Jiraiya informs me that you are already aware of what happened, correct?" Sarutobi said, ignoring Tsunade's glare for the moment. When they nodded he continued, "the memorial service will be held tomorrow, at the Square of Remembrance." He shifted his gaze toward the Uchiha. "Shino, your father confirmed that he'd granted permission for your trip, and Sasuke, you were well within your rights, but in the future I would request that you inform the Hokage's office if you see the need to travel outside the village in the future."
Jiraiya's practiced eye caught the Uchiha's shoulders slumping a little in apparent relief. Surely he didn't think the Village Council would let the Hokage punish him too sharply…? But then he remembered rumors about Kakashi's new training style. Maybe he was hoping the Hokage's acceptance of that legal fiction would keep him on the jonin's good side. Then again, if the stories about Kakashi were true, leaving to warn a classmate of danger was one of the few reasons he might accept for being absent without leave.
Then the genin were dismissed, while the Hokage asked his former students to stay. Jiraiya gritted his teeth and complied. Maybe he would be able to find his godson afterwards.
OoOoO
Naruto went to bed early that night. He wasn't hungry and even skipped stopping at Ichiraku's after they'd been dismissed from the Hokage's office. Of course, going to bed didn't mean sleeping. Instead, he lay on his familiar old twin bed, staring up at the ceiling in the dark. He couldn't stop visualizing what had happened. Had it hurt? Or was it too fast for her to feel anything? Did Sensei even have time to realize she'd broken one of the so-called invincible Genjutsu? He hoped she'd at least had time to know that. But he'd never know for sure.
He twitched as the latch on the window in his living room clicked. In a flash, Naruto was on his feet with the kunai he kept under his pillow. He peered through the slit of his not-entirely-closed bedroom door. The mane of white hair identified the bulky man climbing through his window. Not that anyone not a shinobi would be calmly climbing through a fifth story window like that.
"If you're here for anything besides cup ramen and old mail you're going to be disappointed," Naruto said flatly as he walked into the living room in his pajamas and nightcap.
"I'm too old to take up burglary, boy," Jiraiya shot back, not at all surprised he was detected. He straightened up and looked Naruto over, raising an eyebrow. "You look like a fish is eating your head," he said after a moment of staring at Naruto's nightcap.
"It was a gift," Naruto said defensively. He thought the Hokage had left it on his doorstep one morning, but he'd never known for sure. "So what can I do for you?" he asked.
"I… thought you might want to talk," Jiraiya said after a moment.
Naruto peered at the older man for a moment. Why was he so concerned all of the sudden? Then he thought about his prisoner and his teeth began to grind together. "Despite what happened with Itachi's jutsu, I am not going to willingly release the Kyuubi," he ground out.
Jiraiya looked puzzled for a moment, and then horrified. "No! That isn't what I meant, brat!" The Sannin scowled, and then took a deep breath. "I just thought you… might want to talk. Alone." He made a face and looked down at Naruto's couch. "I was older than you were when I started losing people in the war. The Old- My Sensei talked to me about it. It helped some. Your sensei isn't around, and I made a promise."
Naruto glared at him while his mind worked. In a way, it made sense. Hinata was at home, where Jiraiya was hardly welcome. Shino had his parents to talk to. Maybe he was just trying to help. Maybe everything wasn't about the damn fox. With an effort, he reigned in his temper. "I'm sorry," he said after a moment, "would you like some tea?" He had some instant stuff that wasn't too nasty, and Hinata had taught him at least the basics of etiquette.
So they sat on the couch and talked. Naruto turned a blind eye to the face Jiraiya made when he sipped his tea and listened as the man talked about losing his favorite student… and how he felt when he'd arrived back in Konoha too late to do anything to prevent it.
Naruto didn't say as much, but did ask some of the questions that had plagued him. Yes, Kurenai-sensei's death had been quick and painless. Yes, from Kakashi's report, she seemed aware that she'd overcome Itachi's genjutsu. Jiraiya even reached over and rapped him on the scalp when he said he wished he'd been there.
"Your sensei was a jonin, brat, facing one of the most dangerous missing-nins of their generation," he growled, "I doubt at this point you'd have been anything but a hindrance. Your job is to work your a** off and get good enough so that when you do get a chance, you can clean his ******** clock. Do you understand me?"
Naruto's fists clenched so tight he thought the skin would split. But he nodded his understanding. "Does it ever get any easier?" he asked after a moment.
"Not even a little," Jiraiya said. "And if it ever does, then I don't want to know you. Understand?"
Naruto slowly nodded.
"Good," Jiraiya said. "We get enough of that crap from Danzo's little cult. He says that the perfect ninja has no emotions, but people that practice that nindo never seem to last. They either completely lose their personality, or they crack like Itachi did."
Naruto scowled at the reminder. He wondered if Jiraiya was doing that on purpose… maybe an enemy would mention Itachi just to provoke him? It was something to consider. Kurenai-sensei would do something like that.
As the night wore on, the pauses between questions and answers grew longer and longer until Naruto finally drifted off to sleep. He was mildly surprised to wake the next morning tucked securely into his own bed.
OoOoO
The weather the following day was appropriately gloomy. Storms had moved in during the night, and the morning dawned damp and overcast. Naruto found it appropriate as he slowly donned the plain black formal uniform that every shinobi was issued, but no one spoke of. The funereal garb was worn only if a shinobi of jonin or higher rank was killed in service of the village. Such occasions demanded a formal memorial service. Not many attained such an exalted rank, and the loss of even one was a hard blow that must be acknowledged by the village as a whole.
This tradition began with the founding of the Village Hidden in the Leaves, and was still followed to the letter. Naruto stared at the dark fabric bunched in his hands. If the rumors were true, he nearly had to wear this for the Old Man's funeral. He squeezed his eyes shut as they burned. It wasn't fair! Why did she have to die when he wasn't there to do anything to stop it!
The fine hairs on his forearms bristled as he felt his chakra circulate faster. With an effort, he calmed himself. He would not dishonor his sensei with an outburst, especially not today. He let out a shaky breath and thought about Jiraiya's words the previous night.
Naruto shook himself and slowly got dressed. The reality of what he faced today made everything seem… off. Almost dreamlike. Maybe part of him hoped this was all a bad dream he could wake up from. Even with no basis in reality, just the possibility made his pulse race. He clamped down on his emotions again. Jiraiya's words aside, this wasn't the time to give in to them.
He dressed mechanically and made his way to the square at the appointed time. The overcast morning light seemed to leach the color out of everything it touched, making the horrible occasion seem even more unreal. It wasn't until he saw his teammates that everything became real for Naruto. Shino stood as still as a statue, flanked by his parents. Hinata's blank white eyes were rimmed with red.
The Hyuuga was flanked by her cousin and father. While Neji stood at her elbow, his presence was at worst neutral. Her father, on the other hand… Fine wrinkles gathered at the corners of his eyes. While his eyes were as pupilless as any Hyuuga's, his attention seemed to be fixated on his eldest child as she held herself stiff and still. Given what he heard of the clan elder, he was probably searching for any crack in Hinata's public veneer, so he could reprimand her later.
b*****d.
His appearance, along with the more welcome presences of Shibi and Misato, also served to remind Naruto that with no family, he stood alone. He glanced toward the podium, where Jiraiya and Tsunade flanked the Hokage. Jiraiya looked uncomfortable, but didn't move.
Naruto flinched a little when a hand came down on his shoulder. Iruka-sensei was there, flanked by Konohamaru and his friends. The scar-nosed chuunin gave his former student a sad smile. Konohamaru was uncharacteristically pale and silent. Naruto supposed the death of an adult who'd rescued him was a hard blow. Naruto gave them both a firm nod and straightened his spine a little.
A light drizzle fell as everyone assembled into ranks and the old man gave a short speech. Naruto couldn't recall a single word of the eulogy. Instead, his eyes sought out the framed photograph of Yuuhi Kurenai that was placed on a fabric-covered stand at the front of the square.
Naruto wondered if she knew what this picture would be used for when it was taken. Her brows were slightly drawn together in a frown of concentration, her features displaying the ferocious intelligence with which she approached everything. Sensei didn't accept mysteries in life – everything could make sense, and would make sense if she had enough time to figure it out.
The realization hit him like a kick to the stomach. Now she had no more time, and she wouldn't be figuring out anything else, ever again. Whatever she had that let her see him, see the real him, and believe in him… that was gone, gone forever. He didn't even realize he'd fallen to his knees until the damp pavement soaked through the fabric.
OoOoO
Hinata had managed, with some subtle assistance from Neji, in avoiding her father for most of the previous evening. But tradition required the clan to travel to the memorial service as a group.
She felt her father's eyes on her the entire way.
She didn't know if he knew about her pledge to Tsunade-sama yet. She imagined not, since he hadn't said anything to her yet. It hadn't occurred to her at the time, but on reflection knew he'd take offense.
Surprisingly, she didn't care.
There were plenty of reasons she'd done it. A ploy to get the future Hokage interested in the village. A desperate desire to see Naruto restored to consciousness. But in her heart of hearts, Hinata knew the truth. The moment the older woman had suggested her fee, Hinata immediately accepted because she knew it would be six months that she wouldn't have to return home. To a place she no longer saw as home.
She inhaled slowly, willing her hands to still the trembling that threatened to show. If she wasn't working twenty-four hours a day, she would still be able to see Naruto. Training with him would only make her a more valuable servant, so Tsunade probably wouldn't object. Her objections made sense, unlike… others.
Not having to go home. Still being able to see Naruto and Shino. It would be almost as good as the time she spent with Kurenai-sensei.
Hinata swallowed, the skin around her eyes growing fever-warm. The time she'd spent "convalescing" after she was discharged from the hospital was one of the best times she could remember. The only times that approached it had been when she was very young and her mother was still alive. Father… was distant, but not the looming angry presence he was now. He seemed… content to leave her to her mother. A mother that didn't seem distressed at Hinata's shyness.
She and Sensei had talked for hours, especially that first night. Their first conversation after her fight with Neji had left them awkward, with things between them that could never be unsaid. But Sensei had explained why, and her reasons made sense. Hinata was horrified at her teacher's predictions of Naruto and Shino's actions if she had found the death she sought. But at the same time, a small corner of her soul wondered aloud at the thought of anyone valuing her life so much.
Their talk had consumed the entire evening and left Hinata drained of energy, but as she dropped off to sleep, she also felt lighter in spirit than she could ever remember.
After that, they were more comfortable around each other, like some barrier had been broken down. Kurenai-sensei was very rigorous in her supervision of Hinata's breathing exercises, but her supervision was interspersed with praise – rather than reminders of the foolishness that led to her injury. It bothered Hinata so much that she finally asked Sensei about it.
"Hinata, you know what you did wrong, what good would it do to keep reminding you of it?" Kurenai had asked in return. It was such a simple question, but it stopped the Hyuuga girl in her tracks. What good did it do? What good did it do when her father berated her over and over for every mistake? What good did it do when he reminded her of her failures before every match with her sister? What good did it do to make sure she was always aware of what a failure she was?
No good at all.
Then why did he do it?
Hinata clenched her fists at her sides as the eulogy ended. The weather finally broke, a soft drizzle falling on the assembled mourners. She looked at the portrait of her sensei, and recalled their last private conversation. Sensei had told her how proud she was of her recovery and the way she'd helped her teammates. Then she asked her specifically to watch out for Naruto.
That puzzled Hinata, as by now she was sure he was the better fighter. But Kurenai simply smiled and shook her head. "That's not the kind of help I think he needs the most," was all she said. Hinata still wasn't sure what that meant, but since then she'd seen how badly he'd been affected by the news of Sensei's death. Not all hurts were physical, and it scared her a little to see how badly it cut into him.
Her Byakugan was not active, but motion at the edge of her vision still caught her attention. She swallowed hard as Naruto's legs buckled and his knees hit the pavement. Iruka-sensei squeezed the boy's shoulder, but Konohamaru glanced around, looking a little panicked.
Hinata was moving before she even thought about it. She felt her father's eyes boring into her back, but nothing in the world would stop her from fulfilling Sensei's last request.
OoOoO
Naruto swallowed the hot bile burning the back of his throat as he felt the sense of loss roll over him. If this is what it lead to, maybe that Danzo guy wasn't as stupid as Jiraiya thought. He simultaneously wanted to scream, throw up, and run over and tear that casket open. He wanted to see Kurenai again, and shake her until she woke the hell up and –
His jumbled thoughts cut off as a small but strong pair of arms wrapped around his neck. His head was cool from the steadily strengthening rain, but his eyes felt hot and his vision was too blurry to see now, but he knew it was Hinata, and her father was going to freak out on her and—
Biting back a sob, he wrapped his arms around her waist and squeezed her like a drowning man would hold a life preserver. His eyes screwed shut, he could hear the steady pound of her heart through her jacket. The sound seemed to soften the jagged shards of grief ripping through his insides. His whole body shook as hot tears poured from under his closed eyes. He didn't want to open them, knowing they'd be red for more than one reason.
Then another arm draped across his shoulders and the sound of Hinata's heartbeat was joined by an agitated, but steady hum. Shino's hives, Naruto realized in an instant. He let out a shuddering breath.
No he wasn't alone. He'd never be alone.
OoOoO
The sound of teeth grinding was audible from several feet away. Hyuuga Hiashi had seemed shocked, at first, at his daughter's violation of proper decorum. Especially as it was to comfort an ill-bred piece of trash that clearly had no idea how to behave in public.
He settled for glaring at her for a moment. Hopefully, when she looked back, she'd see his expression and realize the gaffe she had committed. That way she would know to return to her proper place without him having to break protocol as well.
Except she didn't turn around. Or even look back.
His sense of outrage building, Hiashi was about to step forward to retrieve his errant child when he blinked in confusion. The Aburame boy was standing with them as well now, engaging in very unusual behavior for one of his clan. Had that wretched brat infected his entire team with the seeds of madness?
He shook his head. That was a problem for the boy's parents to deal with. He had his own daughter to discipline. It was at this moment that two shinobi, both wearing the formal black tunic and pants, stepped forward, flanking him on each side.
Hiashi froze at the sudden violation of his personal space. He could banish them in an instant with a Kaiten, but to do so now, for anything less than an actual assassination attempt, was unthinkable. And that was a remote possibility, at best, as he recognized both men.
To his right, Hatake Kakashi spoke first. His lips barely moved under his ever-present mask, but the words were clear. "Appropriate weather for a funeral," he said.
"I suppose," Sarutobi Asuma rumbled, a little louder. "Rather not have any at all."
"True," Kakashi agreed. "Still, it's nice to see such a strong turnout. Making Jonin is hard work, something that people should recognize, even if they never see us doing our jobs, neh?"
"If we do it right, no one ever sees us," Asuma agreed.
Kakashi nodded. "Good to see that respect. It's important. Especially since Kurenai was one of us, right, Asuma?"
"Right, Kakashi."
Kakashi nodded again. "Good to see her team together like that. Shows how much she will be missed."
Hiashi made a sharp inhalation. If he thought the humiliation of the Hyuuga clan was some sort of tribute to—
"They're doing better than I did," Kakashi added, seemingly as an afterthought. "When my sensei died, I went on a bender, just so I'd be too drunk to attend the ceremony."
"I didn't know that," Asuma added quietly.
"Things were really a mess back then, I doubt anyone really noticed. I'm sure Sensei understood." Kakashi murmured. "Anyway," he added in a firmer voice, "I know you have no wish to do anything that might seem disrespectful to Kurenai-san's memory, so you'll stay right here and leave her team alone to say goodbye as they wish to."
"You have no right to interfere with my clan," Hiashi hissed under his breath.
"No, I don't," Kakashi agreed. "But I do have a right to share any jutsu I've acquired. You know, 'Copy-Cat Ninja Kakashi' and all that. Bingo book says I know over a thousand." He shrugged eloquently. "I know of at least two dozen that can neutralize or otherwise bypass eye bloodlines… like the Byakugan. Iruka's always after me to contribute some jutsu to the Academy curriculum, especially for their advanced jutsu workshops."
Hiashi froze in place. He turned his head fully toward the former ANBU Captain. "That's treason," he said harshly.
"No, not at all. I'm providing these to the village as a whole. Just because everyone else in the village learns how to fight against the Byakugan – if they have to – doesn't make it treason against Konoha, does it?"
"I don't have anything half so elegant," Asuma added. "I'll just kick your a** if you take one step towards those kids."
Hiashi turned toward the more direct threat. "Do you really think you can do that?" he asked with a sneer.
"A few days ago," Asuma replied in a low tone as the rear ranks of the assembly slowly departed, "the two of us were fighting two of the most dangerous missing-nins in the world. We were out of position or too slow to save a valued comrade from being killed. Now here you are, someone she clearly despised, trying to make an a** of yourself and disrupt her funeral." He paused. "How can we not?"
Hiashi barely stopped himself from lashing out at the fool and making an even bigger spectacle of himself. "You haven't heard the last of this," he snarled.
Kakashi merely nodded thoughtfully.
"Come, Neji," Hiashi commanded, and stalked toward the back of the Memorial Square.
Neji nodded and followed. His expression did not change as he caught the eye of his own sensei, who had a somber expression, but still spared his student a nod.