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Artist Info:
Hi there! My name is Elizabeth Boleyn. <br />
<br />
Interesting facts about me:<br />
<br />
►I like typing lowercase L's instead of uppercase I's because it makes me feel sneaky.<br />
►I'm allergic to chocolate.<br />
►I constantly try to be vegetarian and fail miserably at it. <br />
►I love reading. I often avoid it just so I can get work done.<br />
►My dream is to work at an art museum.<br />
►I listen to really bad cookie cutter American pop music and I'm proud of it.<br />
►I also really like 80's rock.<br />
►Owls and cats are frickin' adorable.<br />
►Grammar is the sexiest thing in the world.<br />
►The future scares me.<br />
►Perry the Platypus is cool.<br />
►My bedroom looks like a 3 year old's best dream.<br />
►I love Vincent van Gogh. Thus my obsession with sunflowers.<br />
►I like videogames.<br />
►I am really bad at videogames. <br />
►Except I kick butt at Sticks and Stones. Cross bow ftw.<br />
►Curiosity killed the cat, but PM for a pic, if you're cool like that.<br />
►Dr. Seuss is my bro.<br />
►I hate coffee.<br />
►I'm addicted to procrastination. <br />
►"You can sleep when you're dead."<br />
<br />
<br />
The History Teacher by Billy Collins<br />
<br />
Trying to protect his students' innocence<br />
he told them the Ice Age was really just<br />
the Chilly Age, a period of a million years<br />
when everyone had to wear sweaters.<br />
<br />
And the Stone Age became the Gravel Age,<br />
named after the long driveways of the time.<br />
<br />
The Spanish Inquisition was nothing more<br />
than an outbreak of questions such as<br />
"How far is it from here to Madrid?"<br />
"What do you call the matador's hat?"<br />
<br />
The War of the Roses took place in a garden,<br />
and the Enola Gay dropped one tiny atom on Japan.<br />
<br />
The children would leave his classroom<br />
for the playground to torment the weak<br />
and the smart,<br />
mussing up their hair and breaking their glasses,<br />
<br />
while he gathered up his notes and walked home<br />
past flower beds and white picket fences,<br />
wondering if they would believe that soldiers<br />
in the Boer War told long, rambling stories<br />
designed to make the enemy nod off.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
If you are interested in avvie art, PM me, I'm opening a shop some day. - Avg. rating:
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a short story
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