• tab She's small, not much taller than five feet. Her thin legs tremble slightly, wobbling as she pulls herself into the worn leather saddle. Her limbs are always a little off just-so; her arms never quite fully straightened in front of her, and her back often fending off a painful hunch. As they walked beside her, her helpers often had to push her legs back into position and help her stay tall. Now she sits regally, albeit a little crooked on top of a scruffy little white pony, with all the elegance of a twisting tree. Nessie* is her name; a name which traces its roots back to a Hebrew original meaning of 'princess'. She was much like delicate nymph surrounded by the stronger foliage of her fantasy court, like a forest of powerful oaks guarding a shy little sapling. Or at least this is what one would have initially concluded.
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    tab In fact, her helpers were no different from her: two high school students still singed from the suicide of a classmate. While Maria* stood taller, branching out to support her with strong knowing arms, Pia* twisted, like Nessie*, unsure of the correct placement. In fact Pia* wasn't much taller than Nessie*, only five foot four and barely one hundred and nine pounds of next to nothing. As Nessie* twisted herself around in search of the illusive stature of the forest of other equestrians riding around her, so too Pia*. When Nessie* was able to find that core position, the base for herself to root firmly and grow more comfortable with herself: that was the moment Pia* was able to take more comfort in her knarled arms, and help Nessie's* roots stay strong.
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    tab Pia* and Nessie* grew together, even though they only saw each other on weekends the two felt a bond that liberated them both. For Nessie*, the ability to ride just as gracefully as the other girls at the barn enabled her confidence and grace. For Pia*, the ability to touch another life was overwhelming, exhilarating, and real. Pam Brown once said that, "A horse is the projection of peoples' dreams about themselves - strong, powerful, beautiful - and it has the capability of giving us escape from our mundane existence. " In many ways, little Snowy the pony symbolized Nessie's* dream of becoming a talented equestrian and strong individual, and allowed Nessie* to escape to a place where being 'like everyone else' was not only tangible, it was easily possible. But Pia* had dreams too, dreams of escaping the helplessness she was feeling through helping another. Sometimes Snowy would take a step that was too big or too short, setting Nessie* off-balance. Each time, a small rush filled Pia* as she felt Nessie* lean into her hands for support; a reaffirmation of the bond they shared.
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    tab Pia* wasn't anyone special really; she and Maria* simply drove out every weekend to walk beside children. First to the left, then to the right, then they might interact here and there, but otherwise they more or less just followed the motions of horse and rider. Pia* was a senior, a competitive rider who was highly involved in band and chorus, but for the most part curled into herself; a defense mechanism she had learned early on to defend herself from the usual bullying and unacceptance of her surroundings. Maria* was a junior, a more confident honor student who was somewhat competitive but devoted more time to her studies than to long hours on the road chasing after riding qualifications. Pia* hadn't anticipated Nessie's* effect. It wasn't until she auditioned for a solo in a school concert that she realized how much she had been leaning on Nessie*. Normally, on stage she would cave into herself; twist and turn in discomfort, in search of someway to hide within the blinding wash of the spotlight. But on that chilly November, she stood tall, rooted firm despite her awkward stance. When she sang, she often sang in shy airy notes, unsure of the key, afraid of the melody slipping her up: afraid of her slipping on herself.
    But as she opened her mouth, something alien came out: a powerful shot of Soprano C: 1046.502 Hz of full-bodied sound. The piece had been an excerpt from a heavily spiritual masterwork: Faure's Requiem, more specifically the Pie Jesu soprano solo. The note nearly knocked her to her feet. Not even that religious, she felt as if something had just commandeered her body and delivered that note; surely she hadn't sung it. A bit unsettled, she continued with the piece, only to be greeted with cannon blast after cannon blast of deeply religious Latin; she hated Latin, and yet as each word left her mouth she nearly broke into tears. Just as she had held Nessie* steady, Nessie* had steadied her from start to finish. She didn't get the solo, it went as usual to the conductor's favorite; she instead got a round of applause from her section of fellow sopranos, and a dropped jaw from Maria* complete with hysteric clapping and a sudden flood of tears.
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    tab Now she watches in awe as Nessie* sits on top of Snowy confidently, with no further need for her supporting hands. Both she and her friend feel a chill run down their spine as Nessie* loses balance, but are quickly relieved and amazed when the little girl rights herself with a quick shift of her hip. She turns left, she turns right, and each time steadies her seat without the slightest fear of falling off. Each time she passes, she lets loose a huge grin, her blindingly white smile shining like a star. Even as she signals the trot, the canter, the halt: they gape in amazement, and revel in the fact that they helped plant the roots that hold Nessie* firmly in her seat. Later, at another lesson, she is put on a more difficult pony, Shamrock*. With her improved balance and control, Nessie* looks gorgeous; it is impossible to tell that she'd ever had trouble before. The little sapling has blossomed, as Pia* has, into a gorgeous twisting tree.
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    tab The true elegance of the twisting tree doesn't expose itself in the same manner of say, a regal oak or gentle willow. Instead the true beauty of the tree is unlocked in the awkward grace of its contorted branches. It exudes a sort of quirky composure that sets it apart from the 'typical' tree. In many ways children living with disabilities personify the same tangled grace, and on horseback unfurl their twisted limbs and complexities whether they are mental or physical and reclaim the beauty that the enabled enjoy every day. Nessie* suffers from epilepsy, and prior to riding for therapeutic benefit was barely able to walk or stand steadily. Her two helpers still volunteer at therapeutic riding centers; one is still helping Nessie* each day at the barn, while the other helps to spread awareness for the benefits of therapeutic riding every single day at her college. After that final lesson together, Pia* quickly managed to take one photograph with her little film camera, and printed it as soon as she got back to school. Today, that photo sits on Pia's* shelf; a reminder of the gift of confidence Nessie* gave to her.