untitled

• Artist: Buffing Daddys Pickle
• Description: well it sums up my depression and what my love life has become i got to write it like how it is from my favorite poet edgar allen poe. i could never understand the whole how you write it with the lines im going it by sentence
• Date: 12/06/2008
• Tags: untitled pain love

in pain i found darkness in my darkness i found solitude in solitude

i found nothing but the beating of my heart i

i searched my heart for my morales

all i found was a broken love a broken dream

there were some joy inside that pain but nothing more but nothing more

i looked for love i found despair

i lost again in this game called love

it finally broke inside my heart it finally could not be put back together

then she came built it up i tried to stop but i wanted it fixed

hoping she would men this broken soul

i was told many things about this one i loved

that she dug for my gold they

said at christmas it would be done the end of the one i loved

that she'd leave and forget i even was real

go again and find a steal another rich desperate man who would only want one to love...

Comments

[Sonomi0186]

Just like that ShadowFalkon guy, and maybe Kaliedo Ruby, (I couldn't really tell what se was agreeing on), you should use punctuation. That's what will bring most aspiring poets or people just writing for fun down. You should put punctation in and let your reader(s) know when to stop and take a breath! You write excellent poetry. Honestly. Without punctuation, though, you'll lose your reader(s) halfway through it. -Sonomi Moonbeam Luxi. (Same as SOnomi Moonbeam Lux)

[bobodia10000]

For the line setup, there's lots of different formats but you usually go by the amount of syllables in a line.

[x_Kaleido Ruby_x]

I agree, shadowfalcon. But, my fave poet is also edgar allen poe

[xShadowFalkonx]

That was pretty good. I wish people would use proper poem format and punctuation, though :-S Just one of those things that gets to me..