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Whispered Words
By N.A. Triantaffelow
Whispered words in the night,
Words so weary, filled with fright,
Desperation, though she might,
Truth be told I hope I'm right.
So you see,
I'm not free,
Walking so carefully,
Because I do so care for thee,
Slip of the tongue, hopefully,
Words so whispered, thought to be,
Words so weary, not to be,
Desperation, not for me!
Truth be told, happily.
So you see,
I am free,
Walking so carefully,
Because I do so care for thee,
Slips no longer, we are right,
Whispered words in the night.
- by Agrikar the Hidden |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 12/12/2008 |
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- Title: Whispered Words
- Artist: Agrikar the Hidden
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Description:
The third. This piece is written with the writer pondering at night, thinking and speaking quietly to himself. A very shy fellow, the writer reflects on whether or not he should ask a girl he likes out on a date, in fear of being rejected and having his timid hopes crushed.
If you notice, half way through the poem it becomes a bit happier, and thus is because he'd accidentally said his feelings aloud around her, only to find out that she felt the same way about him.
Hope you all enjoy. - Date: 12/12/2008
- Tags: whispered shiness love words natriantaffelow
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Comments (7 Comments)
- Fake Silence - 08/24/2009
- Nice one. But it took a while for me to understand, 'cause i missed out reading your description first. 4/5
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- Diosa de Armarrio - 07/17/2009
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I love it! You really used repetition to your advantage. Also, it flows together wonderfully.
And of course, the story behind it is absolutely adorable. - Report As Spam
- God_of_Skills - 05/25/2009
- I'm not sure how this poem goes with the first 2, but I really like it.
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- Alibis of the Heart - 12/27/2008
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The flow throughout the poem is nice and steady. Good job^^
If you don't mind, could you check out come of my stuff? Thanks smile - Report As Spam
- Gray Seraphim - 12/16/2008
- They rhyme is good and it has a nice rhythm, but that can be better if you look at the measure in the first and last stanza, it may be intentional , but keeping a heptameter might make it more consistent.
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- XxxBananasxxX - 12/16/2008
- the word flow together so gracefully
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- dreamerlette - 12/13/2008
- Amazing, it flows well and I love the way you turned it around in the middle.
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