• it makes my ears ring
    you outburst
    your boiling screams

    a fetish for your own body
    a fetish you dread to have
    scraping and skinning away the evidence

    a phobia
    but knowing you can't escape
    you just keep tearing

    you tell me I have to stay
    "I want you to see.
    You have to
    WATCH."

    and you pierce away
    mezmorized
    eyes following each drop

    they slide down your arm

    TAP...
    ...
    TAP...
    ...


    accumulating a puddle
    seeping a little into the ridges of the floor

    you watch ripples form
    around the landing point
    "It's like water, but just a little thicker."

    TAP...
    ...
    TAP...
    ...
    TAP...


    knees collapsing from under me
    snaps up your gaze
    your eyes are scared now

    "You can't be like me. This isn't you.
    You can't follow. Stay here.
    It's safe here."


    and you smile

    i'd beg you to stop but
    "We've been through that," is all you'd say
    "Besides, I'll be too tired to finish soon enough."

    so i wait