• It’s laughable you know… I didn’t see it coming
    It just….. Happened
    This curse of mine, I did not see
    I did not suspect anything to be wrong you know
    Until I could not take it no longer
    I had to break hiding so much it was bound to happen
    You wondered why I seemed so distant even as I screamed without screaming because my body has betrayed me.
    I relished emotion ANY emotion because I need to feel alive…
    These walls I’ve built between me and the world
    My clever mask so deviously donned
    For my own protection they are to keep you out
    Or to keep me in?
    Stupid Questions deserve stupid Answers or else you would not ask “how are you”
    Oh how I wish to tell the truth…
    But I can’t because you won’t understand
    Sadness so deep even tears forsake you
    Apathy so binding, even life can’t make you
    You wonder why I hardly sleep
    Sleep has no sweet embrace for me
    You wonder why I’ve become naught but skin and bones
    Sustenance has no appeal for me
    I want so desperately to live
    As life passes me by
    You wonder why I no longer care about my appearance
    Because I can no longer live this lie
    So much at once
    My mask it relaxed, my walls they cracked
    At last my tears they flood
    I want to be loved
    I don’t need nor want your pity
    I need compassion
    Do you truly know what it is to feel to be in a room filled with people
    And yet be so utterly alone?
    I want to be held just once
    by anyone

    Anyone at all