• Life is done.
    that is a relief like no other, a giant weight off of your no longer tangible shoulders
    i do not have a body, yet i feel as if i am alive, only i feel nothing,
    it is quite an indescribable experience
    as if my thoughts are just floating around in the giant ocean of eternity,
    and i gather them together like sticks, creating a raft to float across,
    my personal thoughts are all that i have to stand upon, without them i would sink
    i vaguely remember feelings, faint memories of times forever gone
    they seem so light-hearted, but yet so vain at the same time,
    as if, looking back, i can see that none of it really mattered,
    none of it amounted to anything.
    the successes that seemed so important on the other side,
    are now nothing but jokes to laugh about on this never ending path to infinity
    i kept waiting for the split.
    i figured, well, heaven will be the next left,
    there's gotta be some sort of notice or something, or possibly in my case,
    a "do not enter" sign. but no, there is no cut in the road, there is no road, really,
    just darkness, and the urge to keep going, like a penny just out of the reach of a magnet, twitching and twisting to satisfy the need to be a part of the pull,
    i get caught up in a flashback, another scene playing backwards in my mind,
    as if it held some sort of vague importance.
    i feel that maybe my whole life was not even my own
    just skits played out in black and white, with horrible actors, and a low budget script
    maybe it was the director's fault, maybe it was my fault, maybe it doesn't matter
    it really doesn't. i am here, here is now, now is gone.
    there's nothing more, nothing less.
    only darkness, and eternity's cold embrace