• The days pass slowly
    And the weeks creep by
    I find myself obsessing
    About ways I could die

    I lay awake at night
    Thinking of my pain
    There's not way it could get any better
    I have nothing left to gain

    Suddenly thought of death
    Are controlling my every move
    And every battle with my mind
    I seem to loose

    I no longer want to be around
    The people that I love
    All that I care about
    Is waiting up above

    I cut my arms with razor blades
    To dull the pain inside
    But that can only last so long
    I don't want to be alive

    I manage to keep my composure
    When people are around
    They wont understand me
    So I don't make a sound

    I smile when I have to
    I break down when I don't
    But I also know I wont

    So I may plan to take some pills
    It shouldn't be long
    I write out notes to all my friends
    To read when I am gone

    I ask my mom to understand
    That life is just to hard
    My mind cant fight it anymore
    My heart is far to scarred

    I plan it out so perfectly
    I even set the date
    I'm pretty sure I'm ready
    I know this is not my fate

    All that I cant think about
    Is how I'm letting go
    And how much I love you
    I really hope you know

    My eyes are getting heavy
    My body feels so weak
    Everything inside is so numb
    This isn't that way it had to be

    I'm glad your not here
    To watch me slowly die
    But I wish I could say
    "I Love You and Good-Bye"

    I give into the darkness
    I slowly slip away
    I hope I go to Heaven
    When dark nights turn to day

    Each tear is like a knife
    Stabbing at my soul
    I let the pain and suffering
    Blind me from my goal

    To love you~