• I keep telling myself I have the strength
    That one day I wont feel this pain
    That the voices are all just in my head
    And they ring with no truth at all
    But still I lay awake in my bed
    Tears streaming my face trying so hard
    To lock all these demons away
    And searching for the sound of acceptance
    In her pained speech
    All she gives me is these insecurities
    And doubt in all of my abilities
    Sometimes I wonder if I’m strong enough
    To make it through this hell
    My minds created for me
    Aided by those who only want to see me fall
    Away into the pit of darkness
    I hide inside but it’s starting to consume me
    I’m not sure what is to be
    I keep looking to the future
    But it’s clouded by my past
    But with his smile lost from me
    Burned away into the darkest ash
    I thought it was the end of it all
    The final scar I would ever see
    But hope found me
    I’m not sure if I’m ready
    Not sure if I want to smile again
    My hearts still heavy
    And I’m still drowning in the sin
    So will I lock myself away for good
    Cut off all the ties to this world
    As a way to cope with this pain
    Or will I open myself up to it
    And let sunshine in
    Or will I find comfort in this noose
    And trust the unknown
    I’m not sure which path ill choose
    Because this world is far too much for me
    But no, I cant be weak
    But oh god I feel so ******** weak
    What strength is left in me

    I hear him yelling, taunting me
    Trying to steal myself from me
    I keep hoping one day he’ll see
    All the pain and destruction he leaves
    But he is far to selfish to care
    And I’m far to selfless to stop loving him
    The words they never seem to leave
    Just open wounds that refuse healing
    And I keep pouring on the salt
    I guess I’m the one at fault
    I can never just let things go
    Never let them free
    I guess I’m too sensitive
    And I guess I just love to bleed
    I just want to feel anything
    Because above all I fear the numbness
    That life sometimes brings
    But at the same time I beg for it
    As a change for all the pain

    ‘She’ll never accept you’ my mind screams
    And as I try to fight the thought away
    I know in my heart it’s true
    And I’ll just have to learn to live with the fact
    She can’t love all of me
    And that he only sees through a fogged glass
    And they will never understand me
    And it’s all my fault
    For being so ******** different
    And walking down this twisted path of insanity
    My mind I beg please let me breath
    Just let me breath
    I’ll close my eyes for tonight
    But I’ve never known sleep
    Because my mind never rest
    It goes on forever