10/4/12

• Artist: caprizant
• Description: A poem I wrote, kinda inspired by my recent melancholy. c:
  Read, enjoy, boo, fangirl, throw tomatoes at it, do what you want.
• Date: 10/06/2012
• Tags: crows marigold sadness lonely alone

the air is cold
but the sun is warm.
wrapped up and folded;
inverted, diverted, perverted
into, within myself.

petals of yellow-orange marigold
scattered on the floor
careful steps, like walking on water.
i can talk to birds,
i can talk to birds.

i feel the chill in my toes
my hands, my fingers, my bones.
save me winter, I've been so alone
i am wandering, i am lost...

cawing as they scatter,
watch the crows.

Comments

[NihilistX]

You should spend more time with capitalization and punctuation so the reader understands better where the emphasis is, where the pause is and for how long. Other than inconsistent punctuation it was alright though I dont follow much of the symbolism, it seems unfocused to me (which could very well be something you are trying to convey)