The D word

[All We Know Is Failling]

Divorce....

I think my parents are getting a divorce. The past couple of days it's been non-stop fighting. My dad even said "Why don't I just leave it's crossed both our minds." I'm not too sure. I'm kinda nervouse sad, happy, and mad. Any advice? Anybody here ever been divorced or parents are divorced. Well I want to live with my mom if it happens. But, then agian I want to live with my dad. My dad is never home. My mom always is. My dad never grounds me or yells at me. My mom does all the time. My dad doesn't cook. My mom does. I'm really nervouse if the divorce does happen... Who should I live with?


:/  

[zomgwhee]

Divorce isnt the end of the world. And you never know they might not get a divorce at all (trust me my parents have been like that and are still married). I know many friends who have gone through divorce and they dont seem to mind and they just have joint custody. But if you had to pick a side i would go with mommie... Its just what symplistic said. Also she gives you life expreances  

[DumberDan]

Alright first step to this kind of s**t...INTERVENE! Say a bunch of lovey duvy stuff...just so long as you can stop the fighting! Get them to understand the stakes and what will happen if they do get a divorce. Tell them how you would feel if they would get divorced. They'll listen. My mistake when my parents were arguing I didn't say anything since I didn't want to express how I felt. Having divorced parents isn't a nice feeling especially when they start seeing other people. It just irks the hell out of you especially if you don't like the person they're seeing. Stop the madness now and prevent the divorce. You can do it bro. I have faith with a little intervention you can turn the tides. About the mommy daddy thing, you won't give a damn about that when they're divorced, you'll just want the desire to have two parents under one roof. It is a HASSLE. You know all your family on one side? Well you aren't going to be seeing them if you let this thing happen. Think of it. Trust me, once you're informed of the divorce, punishment is gonna be the last on your mind. Take it from me. Parents have been divorced since 10. I'm 14 and I've gone through countless hours of counceling. All you'll have is regret for what you could've done.  

[dan d lyon]

Well yeah i had an experience like that. It was horrible listening to their arguments. gonk Well actually it was my step-father and my mom. He cheated on her and physically abused her. They got separated buy not divorced, hes right now living with his "other" wife. Like my mom had to go through that when she has gone through so much before. She had been abandoned by her first husband, who is that father of my elder brothers and sister, and he had died as well by murder. Then she was abused by my father who left her and me. So then she moved on to my step-father who is a complete a**. I mean i think the worst part is seeing her depress and crying. I try to make her feel better but i cant do anything.

So yeah try to top that kiddo. :/

Well other than that you should live with your mom, i mean she might yell at you and such but its for your own good. And i mean your dad is never around so what can he do?

 

[All We Know Is Failling]

Thanks for the advice it really helps.  

[s4mgir1v3rsi0n]

I called her on the phone and she touched herself...

My parents separated when I was a year and a half old. They only married because mom was pregnant with me and dad's family didn't want me born out of wedlock. rolleyes I'm glad they did divorce though, Mom raised me a lot more than dad did and I'm a lot like her. I'm GLAD I'm more like my mom. If they would have stayed together then guaranteed there would have been fights all the time and things would have been a lot worse off, so they did it at a good time. I didn't have to remember any of the drama that must have gone on.

But anyways, I agree with everyone that suggests joint custody if they do divorce. Live with your mom primarily but go to your father's place for weekends and share holidays between the two families. Things might be hard at first but once things are settled it will probably be a heck of a lot less stressful than if they stay together and continue fighting all the time. If they've just hit a bumpy part in their relationship it'll work itself out but if they're truly unhappy together then maybe they should divorce and in the long run they'll be happier for it.

...I laughed myself to sleep.

 

[Shadow fox Azumi]

well i doubt i can be much help, i didnt like my dad and naturally stayed with my mom, i was happy about the divorce, and my life is better because of it. But if i were you i would go with mom, you can have visiting days and weekends with your dad, unless he's to far away for that.  

[SmithPresea]

I remember that! I was 16 when my poor unsuspecting mom very seriously came into my room and said: "Your father and I are getting a divorce." I looked at her and asked "What took you so long?" She slammed me into counseling so fast! rofl 20 mumble years later it's still hilarious! She was so disappointed that I didn't react in the drama-llama fashion of my older sisters. In front of the counselor I told her that she had been miserable ever since I could remember and that I was fully aware that dad was cheating on her. So when my dad went into counseling with me (without her of course) I was again bluntly honest: he was cheating on her and I didn't blame him! I knew and understood what she was all about: the drama, the living her life through my sisters (she waited until my older sisters had married) while neglecting me but keeping me quiet (children should be seen and not heard). blah, blah, blah! Break out the violins!

Moral of the story: everyone can serve as a bad example! My parents taught me everything of what NOT to do in a marriage. Here I am: happily married almost 19 years and in no hurry to go anywhere.

Their marriage is their business. Do you want them to interfere in your love life? Not! So don't try to interfere with theirs. Let them know that the fighting is tearing you up and to either s**t or get off the pot. Keep it simple, state your piece and let nature take it's course whichever way it goes. It's not doing your family any favors to keep fighting. Besides, is what they are fighting over really that important? I've noticed too many people have the weirdest priorities...as long as you can keep a roof over your head and food on the table everything else can work itself out somehow.  

[Yatsunaka]

Well my parents divorced when I was 5 but back then my opinion didn't.Now it does. I would try to talk to them and ask why. If that doesn't work then maybe you should just tell them how you feel. And in some cases if they really are miserable together then it's better to divorce instead of making the child suffer because your staying together yelling at each other.  

[Blueblerry --]

Os iusti, meditabitur....

Me 'as the same problem. sad

Let's just hope your parents never divorce..

sapientiam...

 

[s4mgir1v3rsi0n]

-_-Atomic Eclipse-_-

Os iusti, meditabitur....

Me 'as the same problem. sad

Let's just hope your parents never divorce..

sapientiam...

I called her on the phone and she touched herself...

Why? If they can't resolve their issues and be happy it's better for them to separate.

...I laughed myself to sleep.

 

[Moonlight_Bella]

I wish I could relate to you..though I've never been in the experience of one, I can wish you best of luck and to keep you and your family in my prayers.

 

[DumberDan]

s4mgir1v3rsi0n

-_-Atomic Eclipse-_-

Os iusti, meditabitur....

Me 'as the same problem. sad

Let's just hope your parents never divorce..

sapientiam...

I called her on the phone and she touched herself...

Why? If they can't resolve their issues and be happy it's better for them to separate.

...I laughed myself to sleep.

See here's the thing about it. It's harder when there's a child. Like myself, we don't always accept it like that. Sure they're happy, but that doesn't mean things work out too well for us. We're mainly the ones who suffer. How do you think it feels knowing that you won't be able to attend Christmas day with your mother or not attend Thanksgiving with dad and the family? Not that great I'll tell ya.