Why are people afriad to tell their parents?

[fhbnfghnbfgbsnbg]

I can understand, don't get me wrong.
It just makes me think:
Technically, you're done with them once you graduate.
It's only religion. (Yeah. Sorry, but that's my view. I understand that some people's parents are more... conservative.)

So, may I hear your reasons?
Why were you (are you) afriad of your parents finding out about your atheism?  

[Xiporah]

Most people who are afraid to tell their parents fear homelessness. People can be dicks about religion. That includes ostracizing their own children and throwing them in the streets. It's happened before.

I was never afraid because I was raised in a non-religious household. We didn't pray, go to church, talk about God or anything. Most, however are not as lucky as me to have grown up that way.

 

[ascertain]

I haven't told my parents that I'm an atheist yet because I don't want things to be awkward between us while I'm still living here--and that's almost a certainty with my dad. I won't care once I'm living on my own.  

[JadeDragonSoul]

I don't want to deal with any judgmental thoughts my mom or other religious family members may have once they find out. What they think of me is important to me. If they look down on me how such a thing, then yes, that will hurt. So I'm not going to go out of my way to make it known. I don't know how my mom will react either. Can't be good though.  

[JadeDragonSoul]

Oh, and "it's only religion" is not a good way to view it.

Take a look at the world and see what "only religion" has actually done.  

[Tchaik]

When I told my parents, I didn't know it was viewed as a "bad thing" or even that it had a name. It was just, "you know guys, I don't think God exists." So that's never really been a problem with my parents. (my grandparents are another matter...but I don't care what they say/think of me)

I am afraid though, because the last time I let it slip to the wrong person simply that I wasn't Christian, I lost my part-time job. (or at least, the circumstances were astoundingly fishy. I was good at my job.)

 

[Arios V]

My parents are agnostics/free-thinkers so this was no surprise to them when I told them my religious stance.

However, I think I can understand why so many people are afraid to tell their parents. I think because it generates a rather awkward feeling or because, despite as crazy as this may sound: ridicule, verbal/physical abuse or even being disowned and cast out by the family. We all know that religion is something that you can lose friends and family members over.  

[fhbnfghnbfgbsnbg]

JadeDragonSoul

Oh, and "it's only religion" is not a good way to view it.

Take a look at the world and see what "only religion" has actually done.

Yeah, yeah, I know.
It's not the best mindset to have.

*I guess it's the enviromnment here:
The only time we really ever think of church is when my mother says "Oh, well, I've been thinking about going to church soon." And we go for about a month, then stop.
So it's not a big part of my life.  

[Daffodil the Destroyer]

I'm grown and gone from the house, and I'm still afraid to tell my parents - though I've discussed it at length with my grandfather, who respects my ideas and my right not to believe. Well, honestly, it's really none of their business... it's unnecessary for them to know.

As for why I'm afraid to tell them straight up that I'm an atheist... my dad is one of those people who must be right. You must agree with him or he gets verbally belligerent. I refuse to talk about politics, religion, interracial dating, etc. in front of him; I learned my lesson about that back in high school when I told him I didn't think there was anything wrong with black people dating white people. I just don't care to find out what his overbearing opinion would be if he were to find out I'm no longer a member of the Christian faith, particularly a non-member who doesn't even believe in god.

My mother knows I'm not a Christian; I told her this a long time ago (just as I was beginning to realize I was an atheist, in fact). She knew that my boyfriend is an atheist, and she was all worried about my soul, and she said that she wanted to make sure that I "didn't have a problem with god" or something. Nearly every time I talk to her she goes off on a tangent about church, and I'm never sure if she does this to hint at me or if that's really all she ever thinks about. I'm inclined to think it's a bit of both. I can just imagine how much worse it would get if she knew about my atheism.

 

[Sanguvixen]

In an ideal world, every person could get out into the world once they Graduate from grade school, and be free to believe what they want without back-lash.

However, we don't live in an ideal world. It is becoming harder to get a job, housing prices (in some areas) are going up, and it's becoming more difficult to move out the moment one graduates.

Many people, get stuck staying with their parents until they are through with college, or at least until they work their way up into a good position, or manage to snag a good room-mate to share an apartment with.

When you live in a place where part of your bills, or your secondary schooling is funded by your parents, telling them you are "Atheist" when they are not, is potentially going to cause a lot of problems, and possible loss of funding for schooling, or being kicked to the curb if one refuses to "repent" and "believe".

For those who are still in grade school, this is always the real threat of severe back-lash for telling parents that they "Don t believe".

For those who move out, they still may never tell them because the stress caused would severely hurt the parents, or cause the parents to cut the child off from their lives completely (which can and does happen.)

That pretty much sums up why some people (or many) are afraid to reveal to their parents that they are atheist.  

[Sex! at the Disco]

I'm a whore to religion, quite frankly.

If getting up in a church and singing my heart out in front of 100 people, or teaching little kids in Sunday school is going to keep me out of trouble and money flowing in my direction, I will shout Hallelujah every freakin' morning.

Although I'm extremely smart, caring, sensitive, and reasonable, I'm still too young to have my own bank account in the state of Al; I have no job; I live off my parents/relatives' handouts and graces. Masquerading as a Christian is pretty much my livelihood.


I told my mother years ago that I was atheist, and she cried. It was bad, real bad, but she deals with nowadays. By deal, I mean she takes every opportunity to point out how "God is real" or God is good" and how I should return. Fat chance.  

[Throwaway243]

Well, even though I did decide for myself that I didnt beleive in god, when I told my mom I thought that she would try to encourage me into believing, but to my surprise, all she had to say was that she was an atheist and then she told me that her whole family is comprised of atheists, the earliest being my great grandfather (who was shunned from his family and had to leave his homeland of Scotland), and when I was talking to my dad about it, he said he comes from a religious family but he is agnostic/open minded and he dosnt really know what to beleive.

So it hasnt really been a problem with my immediate family or any of the relatives on my mom's side, but there have been about two or three cases of my friends parents finding out and trying to convert me, or even saying that they didnt want their child hanging around with me.  

[Born Of Ash And Despair]

I haven't told my parents I'm atheist yet because my family is 'super' Christian and it would kill them to know that. I also haven't told them because when my sister told them she was atheist, my step dad freaked out and threw her out of the house, literally. He's a psycho for religion. I've been throwing my mom hints of my atheism, like talking about it and asking her what she would do if I was atheist, and she still hasn't picked up on it. The only people that know are my dad, sis, step brothers and sisters, and all my friends. I'm planning on telling the rest of my family when I graduate high school, which is only a few years away.  

[deactivatedfedcba]

Well, it's not a problem if you have accepting or even atheist parents like me. But if your parents aren't accepting, then telling them could at the very least make life very awkward until you leave home (which isn't a short amount of time for many people). And some parents would be downright hostile toward their kids if they learned they were atheists.  

[Serendipity Splendor]

I come from a religious family. Both my parents are religious: one is Christian and one is Jewish. Both go to services each week, and insisted that I receive the best religious education (Jewish). We constantly talked about God and morals, religious issues......

As soon as I started having doubts I went to my parents. I finally told them, and I must admit they think less of me for it. It's strange because our relationship has changed so much-- I have to be very careful about what I say, or else they get offended. My father especially has given me the cold shoulder.

My family STILL says grace, right in front of me, before dinner every day! They still have Friday night services at my grandparents, holidays like Thanksgiving and Passover are also fun fun fun.... I get glares from my father, and I have no idea how to participate. sad

So, sometimes I wonder, would things be different if I didn't tell them? confused
But there's no way to unring that bell. My family has actually been pretty good about letting me express myself, but other families would be waaaaaay worse.