"I'll pray for you."

[Miz Sharpe]

(This mostly has to do with encounters with Christians, obviously. xD;; I've never had this exchange with someone who was pagan or something. But maybe someone else has, I dunno?)

When you mention you're an atheist, and people say this to you, what do you do? How does it make you feel? How do you respond inwardly and outwardly?

It's awkward for me. I'm never sure what to say.

Honestly, it's a well-meaning statement; when you tell a Christian that you're an atheist, a lot of them honestly believe and fear that you're hellbound. Dx There's no way, sans deconversion, to dispel that fear. I've seen this from the other side of the fence.

I feel uncomfortable about it sometimes; I have very close friends who are deeply religious and seem honestly concerned about the state of my soul. I don't want them to worry about it, but I'm not going to pretend to convert or anything just for their benefit. That'd just be dishonest.

I don't want to offend, but such a statement puts me in a weird position. I can't say "Don't worry," because it means nothing to them. I can't say, "Thank you," because that may set a precedent for them to try and re-convert me. I can't say, "Don't say that," because really, it's not like they meant any harm.

On the other hand, I think it can seem a little patronizing, depending on their delivery, like if you've been in an argument and they're trying to sound all righteous and holier-than-thou.

Thoughts? Experiences?  

[dl1371]

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?  

[Radical Hypocrisy]

I've been told this, namely by friends, so I don't have the heart to tell them not to. However, the one time I was going to be prayed for, I said "Don't, if there is a God, he will not help me. Not because he doesn't love me, but because I wouldn't except any help. I need to do this on my own. It isn't supposed to be easy and there are no free passes in life. Just, don't."

That left them relatively stunned.

To put this into context, I was not laying into a guy I had just had a conversation with. I was in a restaurant with a friend, telling him I was trying to quit smoking. This helpful fellow was at the table across from us, and popped that little tidbit into our conversation. I think it was justified.  

[D i v i n i t y]

The only one who ever says that to me to my face is my best friend and he also happens to be the president of the Christian Club at our school. He just says something along the lines of: "I hope you change your mind and have faith in Christianity again. I'll pray for you".
I know he is sincere in what he says even though he can sometimes be a jerk, very unreasonable, and/or annoying when we ever talk about Christianity and my atheism. I wouldn't say that I feel "awkward" or "uncomfortable" or anything though... I think I just don't say anything (I kind of just let it go through one ear and out the other).
It's nice that my friend and your friend are concerned about us and will pray for us (since they actually believe praying will affect us somehow), but I do find it annoying if anyone keeps telling me that. I mean it's nice that you care, but do you really have to tell me it? I mean what does it accomplish? Sure, praying may help and supposedly affect my atheism, BUT does anyone necessarily have to tell me "IMMA PRAY FOR YOU"?
Yeah, I just don't see the need to actually straight up tell the person that you're going to pray for them.  

[D i v i n i t y]

dl1371

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?

Lol, well you have to realize that they really do think there is something wrong with us. They believe that we don't "see the light" and [a good handful of them] think that we're just blinded by naturalistic science and that we are ignorant.
Also, you can't be too harsh on them for praying for you because they honestly believe that you're destined for horrible things and they want to somehow help. Even if you don't want to be prayed for, it's not against your free will for someone to pray for you. I may not want my friends wasting their time praying for me, but it is their own free will to decide to pray for me if they really want to.  

[Prince Rilian]

I'm past the stage of getting all annoyed. I just think whatever.

But I know that they are saying it as an insult. If they just wanted to pray for you, they wouldn't need to tell you that they are doing it. And they know you don't believe in prayer, so they know it won't help to tell you that. They are not trying to help. They are trying to be rude. I'm not sure exactly why they think it is an insult, but they mean it as one.  

[OtakuJeannie]

I'd tell them that any god who thinks I need to be eternally tortured for taking one look at the information I was given and deciding not to kiss up to and follow another path is hardly a god worthy of my worship.  

[Unrelenting Bloodlust]

My usual response is a polite one. Most of the time, there is good intention behind the words. It is awkward though. Sometimes I respond "Thank you..." if it's a family member. Other times I tell them " I know you mean well, but it would be a waste of your time." If someone is being rude about it, I tell them to 'eat s**t and die' or 'go to hell'. If the weren't previously trying to push there beliefs on me, I'm normally nice. They have the right to believe whatever they want, just as I do. One thing I hate is people trying to 'convert' me...  

[Labtech Soosh]

I tell them not to do it.

And if I find out they have, I fight fire with fire.
I bloody say I'll get some of my Satanic friends to perform a vengence ritual or some of my wiccan friends to place curses on them if they keep that s**t up.
That usually shuts them right up.

I don't find it hard at all to go out of my way and be a d**k when it comes to those certain instances.

 

[dl1371]

D i v i n i t y

dl1371

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?

Lol, well you have to realize that they really do think there is something wrong with us. They believe that we don't "see the light" and [a good handful of them] think that we're just blinded by naturalistic science and that we are ignorant.
Also, you can't be too harsh on them for praying for you because they honestly believe that you're destined for horrible things and they want to somehow help. Even if you don't want to be prayed for, it's not against your free will for someone to pray for you. I may not want my friends wasting their time praying for me, but it is their own free will to decide to pray for me if they really want to.

but they also believe that for god, making us atheist was because we are bad people and we deserve to be punished
or if you're from that website(truechristian.com/atheist) then you think that we're demons from satan  

[Miz Sharpe]

dl1371

D i v i n i t y

dl1371

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?

Lol, well you have to realize that they really do think there is something wrong with us. They believe that we don't "see the light" and [a good handful of them] think that we're just blinded by naturalistic science and that we are ignorant.
Also, you can't be too harsh on them for praying for you because they honestly believe that you're destined for horrible things and they want to somehow help. Even if you don't want to be prayed for, it's not against your free will for someone to pray for you. I may not want my friends wasting their time praying for me, but it is their own free will to decide to pray for me if they really want to.

but they also believe that for god, making us atheist was because we are bad people and we deserve to be punished
or if you're from that website(truechristian.com/atheist) then you think that we're demons from satan

TrueChristian is satire. As in, a joke. Not real. xD  

[D i v i n i t y]

dl1371

D i v i n i t y

dl1371

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?

Lol, well you have to realize that they really do think there is something wrong with us. They believe that we don't "see the light" and [a good handful of them] think that we're just blinded by naturalistic science and that we are ignorant.
Also, you can't be too harsh on them for praying for you because they honestly believe that you're destined for horrible things and they want to somehow help. Even if you don't want to be prayed for, it's not against your free will for someone to pray for you. I may not want my friends wasting their time praying for me, but it is their own free will to decide to pray for me if they really want to.

but they also believe that for god, making us atheist was because we are bad people and we deserve to be punished
or if you're from that website(truechristian.com/atheist) then you think that we're demons from satan

Well, I think it's important to understand how you define "bad", or how they define it rather...
I have Christian friends who will often make compliments and call other people "good people" but I have some that will devoutly profess that "we're all bad. Only God is good."
If the latter is the case then I guess it's not so bad if they think we're bad haha.
As for the common definition of "bad", I don't think (but I'm not sure) that many Christians regard us as "bad" people. I think they see us more as "blinded and ignorant" people who deserve to be punished for being, as many of them would say, "willfully ignorant" and/or "defiant towards God".
It's sad that many of them believe that we will be damned to hell for simply NOT worshiping and believing in their God because we sincerely believe that there is no good evidence and that we are simply trying to be rational and pursue objective truth.  

[[-Erik-]]

I simply say "The same will happen in the absence of prayers, but thanks for your concern c:"

 

[Anavis]

Prince Rilian

But I know that they are saying it as an insult. If they just wanted to pray for you, they wouldn't need to tell you that they are doing it. And they know you don't believe in prayer, so they know it won't help to tell you that. They are not trying to help. They are trying to be rude. I'm not sure exactly why they think it is an insult, but they mean it as one.

This is what I run into in high school, and often. The only purpose of telling you that you're being prayed for is either:
1. You believe in prayer and it is supposed to give you comfort (which isn't the case if the other person KNOWS you are an atheist), or...
2. It is a patronizing attempt to say, "Oh, you silly thing, I'll pray for you and be right here when you realize you're wrong."  

[dl1371]

Miz Sharpe

dl1371

D i v i n i t y

dl1371

i hate it when they say that, its like they think that there is something wrong with you
and what if we dont want to be prayed for, ever heard of free will?

Lol, well you have to realize that they really do think there is something wrong with us. They believe that we don't "see the light" and [a good handful of them] think that we're just blinded by naturalistic science and that we are ignorant.
Also, you can't be too harsh on them for praying for you because they honestly believe that you're destined for horrible things and they want to somehow help. Even if you don't want to be prayed for, it's not against your free will for someone to pray for you. I may not want my friends wasting their time praying for me, but it is their own free will to decide to pray for me if they really want to.

but they also believe that for god, making us atheist was because we are bad people and we deserve to be punished
or if you're from that website(truechristian.com/atheist) then you think that we're demons from satan

TrueChristian is satire. As in, a joke. Not real. xD

i realize that, but ive met some people who think its actually not a satire