#TeamHeavenfires Car Ride to WrestleMania

[red_dragon_masta]

10:15pm Saturday

Jack Arson and Angel were driving down I-64 on their road to WrestleMania. Jack was behind the wheel as he began to get off on an exit ramp, Angel began to stir. Looking around, Angel noticed the Arch and was confused as he began to speak to his brother.

"Um...Jack, where the hell are we?"

Jack, not taking his eyes off the road would quickly respond.

"We're in Saint Louis bruh...why?

Angel shook his head, and let it fall against the headrest.

"Jack, why the ******** are we in St Louis..You're going the wrong damn way. "

Jack looks confused.

"We're going to Texas aren't we?

"Why did you think that?

"I heard you saying that WrestleMania was gonna be the biggest thing Madisonville had ever seen. I'm not sure why WWFG is going to a town where the population is only 3600 but who am I to ask questions??"

"Well maybe you should have, because WrestleMania isn't in Madisonville, Texas...Its inside Madison Square Garden Jack. But it seems that your inability to use a map has placed us in the stomping ground of our WrestleMania opponents. Head out to the airport. Lets ******** with some people.

11:20am Saturday

Pulling up outside a very lavish house near the airport, Angel and Arson would cut the lights off their car, and Arson would look at Angel, not quite sure if this was the best idea. Angel was clutching a brown paper bag that had the top of it folded over. and a lighter. looking at Arson, Angel would speak,

"Just wait here...I'll be right back."

Then Angel would get out of the car and would make his way toward the door. He would carry the bag and place it on the Welcome mat, before lighting the corner on fire and pounding on the door. Angel would then sprint toward the car and dive in Luke Duke style. From here...Team Heavenfire waits for the hilarity to ensue.  

[Drako Damone]

the door to said house opens, and a tall dark skinned African american man steps out. Fans would have no idea who this man is, though guesses can be made.The guy is dressed for work, wearing a suit. He might even have been on his way out. Spotting the bag on fire, instinct comes in and he looks to stomp it out. Doesn't take long to realize something isn't right here.

"Um, is this what i think it is?" He looks down at his shoes. "Wife of mine, I believe someone has decided to do the old lighting a bag of dog crap on fire trick on us."

Into view comes a far more familiar face, Janelle Damone.

"I didn't think kids still did that. It's so old school." She looks outside and spots the car. "Oh, well, maybe because it wasn't kids. Go clean your shoes and clean that up. I'll take care of it."

"Is this a work thing?"

Janelle pulls out her phone. "Of course it is. Biggest show of the year is coming up and my brother picked the absolute biggest assholes he could find to challenge, and they put their careers on the line. Now, move along. I've got this."

As the man in question does what he's told janelle snaps a picture of the car, followed by some maneuvering clearly indicating sending a message.

"That was disgusting. Haven't seen anyone do that since I was a kid."

Her phone goes off as her husband returns to clean up the remains of the mess.

"Aren't you going to do something, or should I go have a word with the gentlemen in the car?" He asks

Janelle doesn't look up from the phone.

"Trust me, I've got it handled," she answers. "Besides, no need for you to go getting your a** kicked by a sledgehammer wielding maniac/pyromaniac and his lunatic brother. Now hurry up before you're late for work."

Janelle steps outside and looks directly at the car. No wonder she'd never been a housewife. Thinking quickly, she picks up a rock.

"Hey, assholes, next time, drive faster."

With that she launches the rock at their back windshield  

[red_dragon_masta]

As Janele's husband stomps out the bag of feces Angel and Arson are rolling laughing inside the Corvette, and Angel yells out of the car.

"Hey buddy, that ain't dog crap either...Jack ate 25 White Castle Burgers and filled that up just for you at the 7/11 down the street."

Having got their laughs in Arson begins to drive away when suddenly.

CRAAAASH!!


The back window of Angels Limited Edition Corvette is shattered by a rock that was sent hurdling through the air with nasty intentions. Furious, Angel would hang his head out of the window and scream.

"b***h I'M TAKING THAT $5000 WINDOW OUT OF YOUR BROTHERS a** SUNDAY...BELIEVE THAT!!"

Jack would pull his brother back into the car before the lunatic decided to jump out and take his frustration out in what would quickly become a domestic disturbance. Tossing Angel back into the seat, he would speak quickly.

"Angel, relax..I know the perfect place for you to let off some steam after having your window smashed...and we can get smashed in the process.

Angel would nod, and as Jack began heading toward their next destination, the thought would enter Angels head for the first time that this might be his last road trip to WrestleMania, so they may as well make it count.

"Yeah ******** it, I could use a drink...let's go man."

To Be Continued...  

[red_dragon_masta]

2:15am Sunday
Penthouse Gentlemen's Club, Sauget, Illinois.
After a few hours of winding down from having the back glass of his Corvette smashed by Janelle Damone, the camreas come back on as we continue the coverage of Team Heavenfires car ride to WrestleMania! Inside the beautiful Penthouse Gentlemens club, Angel can be seen by the stage, handful of dollar bills and several empty glasses around where he was sitting. Arson was not in the shot, which means he's probably in the back trying to catch a venereal disease from one of the strippers. A man comes and has a seat next to Angel, and after a double take speaks to The Celestial One.

"Hey aren't you the man they call Angel?"

Angel diverts his attention to this man only briefly to reply.

"Yeah, that's what they say, what's it to you?

The man is a bit off put by Angels sarcastic response.

"Oh I was just wondering, there's someone here looking for you and he sent me over here to see if you were the guy he was looking for..carry on."

The man would quickly get up and leave, making his way to the VIP section and out of sight. Angel wondered just who the ******** was looking for him in the middle of nowhere..but figured it really didn't matter and went back to what he was doing.

About that time, Jack came out from the back, making his way over to the stage he would have a seat next to Angel by the stage. Smirking he would joke with Angel

"You know Angel, right amount of money and that pretty girl on the stage will take you to the back and touch your junk."

Angel laughed, and looked over at Arson.

"You know Jack, right amount of GAME and you don't need money. I'm just throwing this poor girl a little bit of cash to pay her tuition..I don't pay for disease ridden p***y..."  

[Drive Type Wild]

"You shouldn't talk bad about strippers," a familiar voice says. "After all, I paid for my in-ring training as a bouncer. Matter of fact, I just so happen to be in charge of this club."

The camera pans out to reveal none other than St. Louis' own Shaman of Sadism, the Snypa Rifle, face painted but wearing a black blazer over a black tanktop and jeans. It was no secret he owns a strip club in East Saint Louis. He takes a seat on the stage and waves for the girl to get off, which she does.

"Too bad about your car, really. I mean, what with the broken back window and the windshield that was taken out a few minutes ago."  

[red_dragon_masta]

"There better not be anything wrong with my windshield, or there's gonna be hell to---'

Angel began turning around as he spoke, only to stop as he made eye contact with the demented genius of extreme. A smile came over his face as he spoke.

"Well if it isn't Jarel's little b***h? You own this place? I was wondering why it had a stink of mediocrity from the second you walk through the door...but now I see why. So, to what do I owe this interruption, young Cassie up here on the stage is trying to make enough to pay for her Chemistry books next semester and talking to you isn't making me want to tip her another cent.

The stripper on the stage looked offended, and yelled at Angel.

"My name is Carrie, you piece of s**t!"

Angel would speak over his shoulder as something told him taking his eyes off the Ryfle was a bad idea.

"Yeah of course Christy, sorry I get you all mixed up. You should really pick stage names that don't sound alike.

Jack was laughing at Angel botching the strippers name, and laughed even harder when the second botch caused CARRIE to storm off to the back in a fit of stripper fury. Then someone caught Jacks eye, a women by the bar who Jack thought couldn't be who he thought it was.  

[Drive Type Wild]

"Just wanted to offer you my condolences this Sunday when the Damones bust your sorry asses up. You think the pain Jarel inflicts when his Streak is on the line is something to behold? Take his career being up for grabs and multiply it by fifty."

In that moment Angel turns away from him, Snypa stands and readies himself to possibly spit his borrowed Black Mist into the eyes of the Celestial One should he turn around.

At the VIP bar in the VIP section, which costs $2500 to enter, is a former Women's Champion around the world. She has strippers of every ethnicity gathered around her and is throwing fifties like candy. She's essentially the only female high roller that comes to visit both Penthouse and Country Rock Cabaret. In Damita's hand is a bottle of Patrón XO and she's pouring glasses for all the girls she wants to do private dances with. She has little to no idea two of the most hared guys in all of wrestling are in the club right now.  

[red_dragon_masta]

Angel, who had never took his eyes off Snypa because he knew all to well that the demented genius never went into a fight without that Black Mist, would smile at Snypa and make the remark.

"Ya know, you should probably stop letting Shadow blow loads in your mouth, all that black s**t is gonna stain your teeth...but hey then you'd fit in REAL nice amoung all these trashy strippers you manage. Jack lets get the hell outta here, I suddenly feel like vomiting and it's probably got something to do with the stink of failure coming off of this guy."

Angel would turn to see that Jack was nowhere to be seen. Jack had made his way over to the VIP to get a closer look at the women clutching the Patron bottle. He hadn't seen Damita in years and truth be told, there was always something inside of Jack (or inside his pants at least) that really wanted to get inside Damita and see what she was all about.

Realizing that Jack had left him to deal with Snypa alone didn't bother Angel, what did was seeing who just walked through the door...  

[Drako Damone]

through the door comes another familiar face, the youngest Damone sibling, Drako. He looks around and spots exactly who he's looking for. Time to join the party

"Bro, you started the party without me? Thought we were better than that."

The Soaring Dragon turns his attention to Angel.

"Well, will you look at this? It's my brother's next victim. How's it feel knowing that in roughly 24 hours you'll no longer have a career in the wrestling business?"  

[red_dragon_masta]

Angel looks at Drako and smiles.

I don't know this club was where all of wrestling's irrelevant losers congregated. I'll have to let Jed know the next time I see him. Tell him what a s**t hole WWFG has became since he left while I'm at it."

Angel sure knows how to make friends doesn't he? Grabbing his glass off the table behind him as he stood up from his stool, he would hold the glass out to his side as he would then continue to fire on the two people he had just pissed off to no end with his smart a** mouth.

"But lets be serious here guys. I know Janelle called you two clowns because of the flaming s**t we left on her porch. But lets be serious, we both know that even two on one with me drunk...I'd kick your asses and embarrass you right in front of the sexually frustrated crowd of disgusting filth that you cater two. How's it feel to know I might not have a job next week? How's it feel to know that neither of your pathetic excuses for careers ever really mattered?"

Angel would then look to smash the glass against the side of Snypas head, and this was going to be ugly because...


...Jack was fully distracted, just coming off of $2500 of the advance that he had been given by Miranda to take the match....the rest was more then your heads could even begin to understand and he would get that after WrestleMania. Jack was making his way over to Damita Ace, arguably one of the greatest to ever compete in the Womens division..although she really haden't tested herself against some of the newer women in wrestling today. Jack had no idea his brother had just pretty much wrote a check his a** couldn't cash and Jack for some reason left his brother out to dry.  

[Drive Type Wild]

Snypa looks up to see the youngest male Damone, only to find himself stumbling backward after said glass has hit him in the side of the head. He's been through worse but he's down for now as the patrons turn to watch the ensuing brawl.

Damita looks up at the mirror behind the bar and sees an unexpecting patron headed toward her and the other ladies. She turns up her nose but turns around in her stool.  

[Drako Damone]

well, since Angel went for Snypa, Drako figures he might as well go for Angel, looking to punch him right in the side of the head. All's fair in war and barfights you know  

[red_dragon_masta]

Angel was hit right in the temple by the right from Drako and was sent stumbling backwards, flipping over a table as he did so. Drako really hadn't punched Angel all that hard but The Celestial One had been a bit too friendly with his bartender this evening and was a bit smashed. He would scramble to his feet and one of his hands would go up he knew this wasn't gonna be good.

Meanwhile Arson had made his way over to the bar where Damita was sitting and would lean on the bar next to her and speak just above a whisper.

"You know, there are many reasons why I'm called a Wrecking Crew..care to find out one of them?

Wow. If that doesn't get Jack slapped I don't know what will..but stranger things HAVE happened.  

[Drako Damone]

Drako grins.

"You being drunk almost takes the fun out of this. Almost."

The Soaring Dragon quickly fakes a left but really throws a right, aiming to hit the Celestial One right in the nose. Should this work, he'd attempt to send Angel on a little ride across the bar, face first and there's probably going to be some pissed patrons  

[Drive Type Wild]

Damita turns to Arson and looks him flat in the eye.

"Sorry, unless you're female, I'm not interested."

Snypa touches the side of his head and it come back red. He fumes and stands up. Should Angel get sent along the bar, Snypa will look to boot him in the side of his head.