The Temple of the Sheol God

[Sheol Zone]

Bow your heads in reverence to the Sheol God. This is his temple. By the way, he likes cookies.

The temple itself is a stunning design, from which many cultures can be seen embedded into its structure.

Across the walls, one would notice the material changes from marble to sandstone to pure ivory or jade in places, etched with scenes that resemble that of the Egyptian heiroglyphics.

The columns are made of obsidian and are of the Greek style doric, stretching a vast 40ft up to the pyramidic ceilings.

In the five corners of the temple stands a building similiar to the Gopuram of India.

At each main doorway or entry way are the marble beasts gilded with gold in places, most like the beasts guarding the "Spirit Way" in China's Forbidden City.

In the very center of the temple is a straight staircase which leads to the Main Temple, reminscent of the Mayan temples and would be entirely if not for the Japanese touches all across this core Temple. The temple is 200ft up, and this is where the Sheol God resides. The disciples have their own rooms throughout the surrounding temple and the five Gopuram.

About the hell-maze. This is just a large labrynith with no ways out, the walls being of solid black diamond that rises straight up for 30ft with oil coating to make them even more slippery. Despite the walls being made of diamond, they are not transparent. The maze stretches out to be comparable to five football fields in length, and near the size of Texas in width. Of course, the hell-maze is mostly located in a sub-dimension so it cannot interfere with current geography.

Rumor has it that in the center of the maze.. there is a door. A door that leads down into Disciple NG's room! Horrors!

While in the maze, watch out for matches.




Temple Directory

1- Here
2- The Divine Laws
3- The Bible (So Far)
4- The Disciples of the Sheol God
5- The Worshipping Rituals
6- The Many Forms of the Devil



Watch out for my guard! <3 His name is K'wai, and he eats devils! 'Cept the cutie Ka'ai. I like that devil. twisted  

[Sheol Zone]

The Divine Laws of the Sheol God

Law One:
"Thou shalt worship only the Sheol God, and no less than twice a day."

Law Two:
"Thou shalt have naughty deeds with thyself or with others at least once a day."

Law Three:
"Thou shalt pay respects to those that the Sheol God finds kinship with."

Law Four:
"The divine foods are spaghetti, pocky, cookies, peener and tuna. Thou shalt eat nothing else."

Law Five:
"Thou shalt expose thyself to thy friends every day."

Law Six:
"The holy weapons are named as a butterknife and a spork, thou shalt use these tools with the utmost respect."

Law Seven:
"Thou shalt use nothing else to eat but sporks and chopsticks."

 

[FogSage]

"In the begining, there was nothing. Not even bacon. BUT THEN! Sheol woke up."

"Sheol saw the nothingness and was sad. 'Jeez, so empty!' Sheol remarked. And so he created the world. It was round, with many pointy mountains and pine fresh forests and rivers and lakes and streams. But.....where was everyone? Sheol took a lump of kitty litter, put some water on it, and molded it into the first furry of the world."

"Sheol made the furry a male. and thus named him Kitter, which means "Kitter" in the sacred language. He got ready to make him a mate, but then Kitter said, 'Sheol, I don't want a girl.' And Sheol was confused, but made another male. He named this one Fog."

"Sheol got busy getting food and stuff ready for the pair of furries, and He told them that they were permitted to go wherever they pleased, except the building marked "ALL FEMALE REVUE." 'If you go in there, you'll wish you hadn't!' he warned and the pair were quite happy to oblige."

"However, one day, Kritter had to go to the bathroom, and everywhere else looked too pretty to go in, so he ran into the Female Revue. When he came back out, he had a furry girl on his arm and looked pretty sleazy. "Come on Fog, come in here, it's awesome!" he said. Fog came in and suddenly Sheol's voice said 'HOW DARE YOU DISOBEY ME?!' The two male furries quaked in fear. Sheol expelled them from the paradise they had lived in, which had been called the Garden of Schmeeden, and were sent out into the cold, cruel world."

"Kitter was so ashamed, he left Fog and ran into the eastern deserts with his new floozy, never to be heard from again. He and his "wife" did reproduce at a shocking rate, having over 50 children in a span of 10 years. It was no surprise that Kitter's wife died after delivering the last. child. He remarried and the whole process started over again. Unknowingly, he played a important part in populating the eastern part of the world."

"Fog was so ashamed that he dedicated his life to serving the God and eventually became His first disciple. Sheol forgave him for going into the forbidden building with Kitter, because he acted out of ignorance. 'I need more disciples.....twelve more.' Sheol told him one day. 'Yes, God, but how will I know them?' Fog asked. 'You will know because when you speak of me, they will jump up and start making monkey noises.' Sheol replied. So Fog treked across the world to find some people."

"Fog walked and walked and walked and became very thirsty and hungry, for he had brought nothing with him. Suddenly, he came upon a oasis and there by the small pond of water was a raccoon. Fog instantly was smitten and walked over to talk up the furry. His name was Kuri, and he belonged to someone. 'Why not become a disciple?' Fog asked. 'I don't want to be a disciple. I just want to be left alone.' Kuri said. Fog was sad and after refueling left the oasis, never to return again."

"Fog walked right across the desert in three days and three nights, each night walking back from the edge of the desert and stopping to rest at the Holiday Inn, which was a great hotel at a modest price. After doing this three more days, the cleaning staff got anxious, because Fog kept using up all the good towels. They went to the manager, who compromised by arranging a shuttle bus to ferry Fog to the edge of the desert. Fog consented, and all the cleaning staff did funny dances and sang songs about having kinky sex. In the morning, Fog was carted off, with many stolen pens, paper pads, and soaps in his pockets."

"It came to be that once Fog was out of the desert, he could see a city in the distance. He walked towards it and by the end of the day, he was there. The first thing he noticed were three female furs beating up a male bull furry. They were screaming at him about how mad they were that he had told their husbands that each was being untrue to them. The bull sat there, miserably, as the women continued to rant and beat him with brooms. Fog took pity and thundered, "BE STILL AND OBEY! Has not the God always forgiven you for being such scandalous whores? So you should be thanking this bull for telling your husbands what you've been up to, so that you may reform your wicked ways." The women stopped beating up the bull and ran towards Fog, screaming obscenities and promising he'd be crapping into a bag when they finished with him. Sheol saw all this and became enraged. He took a massive flyswatter and simply skooshed all three of the ho's in one go. "Make this bull my disciple." He commanded Fog, and it was so. His name was Megido, but Fog called him Megido the Honest. And there was much rejoicing."

"Fog and Megido continued across the desert, and presently came across a gypsy settlement. The leader of the gypsies welcomed them with open arms, for these gypsies were the great-great-great-ubergreat grandchildren of Kitter, who had still worshipped the God while in exile. The leader of the gypsies said that they were regular in their worship of Sheol, and that nothing would please them better than to house the pair of disciples for the night and give them provisions enough to see them to the next stopping point. There was a small catch, though, he said. "I am worried about my son, Af Mas. Lately he's been very unhappy and confused about what will happen to him later on in life. Could you somehow ask the God if He could possibly take him on as a disciple? You would be doing both me and my son such a big favor." Fog agreed, as there was no harm in asking, and asked the God if He would do as the gypsie leader had asked. "But of course. If he will faithfully serve me, I will readily take him on." He told Fog, and he relayed the news back to the leader. There was much rejoicing that night, dancing and feasting and a rather large orgy in which Fog lost his best pair of sandals. In the morning, all three disciples left and went on their way to the next city, Shickabambam."

"But on the way to the city, it came to be that there was a disagreement between Fog and Megido, concerning what was the better baked good, Pocky or cookies. Fog, of course, leading the way, said that Pocky was a holier food than regular cookies and thus infinitely better than cookies. Meg retaliated by saying that Pocky was ******** stupid and who the hell wouldn't eat a cookie? Affy kept his mouth shut, he knew better than to get between the two of them. The pair of disciples bickered back and forth for at least five hours, until Sheol became irate with the both of them and gave them each thirty smacks with a newspaper, until they both fell on their knees and begged the God to forgive them. He did, and thus proclaimed:

"IN THE EYES OF THE GOD, ALL THINGS ARE AS EQUALS. Excepting hotdogs, for I am highly fond of them."

And so the three of them agreed on this and continued on the way to Shikabambam."  

[Sheol Zone]

The Disciples of the Sheol God

There are but 13 Disciple positions, and these are Sheol's favored. His kin, his companions, remember the Third Divine Law!

Fog
Megido
Affy
NG
Slavkei
Shadow
Diana
Rainey
Sphyxie

 

[Sheol Zone]

The Worshipping Rituals

Refer to the First Divine Law, thou must worship a mininium of twice a day. To worship, one must sacrifice their beloved belongings to the Sheol God.

A List of His Preferences:

Hotdogs
Bulls
Badger peener
Cookies
Pocky
Noobs

Another way to worship the Sheol God is to slay as many noobs as possible. Every noob counts as one worship session.

 

[Sheol Zone]

The Many Forms of the Devil



The Sheol God is distraught that his followers' lands are filled with demons. <3 Do him a favor and smite these infidels.

First Form of the Devil: Noobs.
Second Form of the Devil: Flamers.
Third Form of the Devil: Prejudice.
Fourth Form of the Devil: Depression.
Fifth Form of the Devil: Sauceless Spaghetti.
Sixth Form of the Devil: Blasphemy.

 

[Sheol Zone]

The Temple is Open to Worship! <3  

[FogSage]

*comes in and worships by throwing hotdogs on altar and burning them*

YES! BE REVERENT, ALL YOU MASSES! domokun  

[Sheol Zone]

<3 I like that. Kitty litter furry. I shall name him Kitter.  

[FogSage]

Also........if you are too poor to give offerings to Sheol, merely give the disciples tummy rubs. The disciples will give offerings in your name. razz  

[Champagne A pornstar Fox]

FogSage

Also........if you are too poor to give offerings to Sheol, merely give the disciples tummy rubs. The disciples will give offerings in your name. razz

woot *gives you a tummy rub*, i think i found a religion for me ^^ or a cult, ahh what the catnip  

[FogSage]

Champagne A pornstar Fox

FogSage

Also........if you are too poor to give offerings to Sheol, merely give the disciples tummy rubs. The disciples will give offerings in your name. razz

woot *gives you a tummy rub*, i think i found a religion for me ^^ or a cult, ahh what the catnip

OMG, you totally copied my clothes. T.T

*throws some pocky on the altar*

*chants* This offering made in the name of Champagne.........*rocks back and forth*  

[Araclast]

^^ throws a crate of poky into the offering thingamagiger  

[UglyCoyoteNG]

ohgodimadeciple! .:.worship.coughs up hotdogs and bulls.:. ^_^  

[Sheol Zone]

Yay! ~Claps~ Worshipping!

~Flops onto a pillow and curls up, giggling.~ Let the chatting of the people commence! <3