New Character Designs

[Light of Nuitari]

I'm starting a story. But I need some opinions of one of the main charaters' design. I haven't decided for sure on her name yet (leaning toward Eris), but she's the Nightmare Queen. Sister of Death himself. Unlike her brother, though, she is flesh and blood, but no less immortal.

"They say that from Nothing came Existance and from that was born Life and Death. From Life sprang Hope, from Death, Fear. From Hope came Dreams and from Fear came Nightmares. Well, perhaps that is the way it came in the mortal psyche, but not in the order of our existance. In reality, Death is my brother. I am the Nightmare Queen."



It's a rough sketch. I'm still playing around with it. Plus it looks weird, 'cause my scanner eats pencil. But because it's rough, don't bother correcting me on the technical stuff. I just want opinions on overall character design please. Anything you have to say (except flaming) is appreciated.

To add a little more detail, she hides her eye with her hair because that eye sees into the nightmares. It is black where normally it would be white, a deep red in the iris, and the pupil an even deeper red (at least for now, anyway). Because it looks freaky, so to speak, it's easier just to keep it hidden. Few have ever seen it.  

[DarquePinkPaper]

I like it.
For me though, I just think her hair should be more smooth and slick looking, not so rough.
Having hair like that would suggest she's somewhat uncivilized, or uncontrollable...unless, that's how she is. Then totally leave it that way. sweatdrop  

[[Mariko]]

I really like that sample of writing. It's quite nice :3

I agree with Darque's assessment of the hair. Try smoothing it out a bit and see how that works :3
 

[Light of Nuitari]

Hmm. That makes me wonder. She's not necessarily uncivilized. But she does have an imposive, wild-ish personality. Uncontrollable is a definite. She's not insane...but she has her crazy moments... sweatdrop

But I'll give it a try, and play around with different hair.  

[Light of Nuitari]

Oh! And thanks for liking it. xp  

[I_R_Supper_Nub123]

I think it's alright so far, but she looks a tiny bit bland. Try changing her eye shape a little, to something more exotic, something...Iunno. I really do like the writing piece that goes with it. ^^;;;

 

[black_knightj]

Not to bad all together rather then the drawing I would try to deepen the meaning in the writing. ( sorry im a stickler for good writing. )  

[Light of Nuitari]

Okay, how about this?

 

[DarquePinkPaper]

Nice!
That's what I was thinking when I was reading the post you said about not really uncivilized but uncontrollable.

Giving her smooth hair in the back and frayed hair for the front is a good way to do that! =D  

[Light of Nuitari]

Awesome. Thanks Darque.  

[I_R_Supper_Nub123]

Tis much better now. ^_^ Just a few small changes can change a drawing so much, it's amazing. ^_^  

[Twilight Falcon]

Just passing through, sorry *meaning no time to read it*  

[Light of Nuitari]

Okay, I've been bored and playing around with this stuff a little more... I have some more sketches for ya to pick at. Yayness...?

Okay, first of all, for those of you who wanted to see her right eye, this is my current design for it all. Keep in mind it's still a rough sketch (meaning I know the right eye is not perfectly centered with the other and whatnot.)



K, next, just for the hell of it, chibis!



And next, the brother. My version of an old design:



Well?  

[Valoheart]

That sounds like a really good story!!  

[Light of Nuitari]

Thanks. I'm still brainstorming on it. Hopefully, it'll be one I can stick with long enough to finish.