Epic quotes (Screw cleanliness, it's no holds barred, now)

[ChainsawDooM]

i am about to sell the oldest disks in the world :d
those 5 1/4 inch floppys moses saved the 10 command prompts on?  

[ChainsawDooM]

<@pc|dogg> I'm using a file search engine, looking for the wonderful 6-movement "Dona Nobis Pacem" by Vaughan Williams. The only result it comes up with is (no joke)
<@pc|dogg> "Donald duck gets a blow job.wma"  

[ChainsawDooM]

ie ergo vis-a-vis concordantly ex thusly betwixt!
Chop: You missed a "therefore" and a "etc."
well i didnt miss YOUR MOM WITH A HUGE LOAD OF SEMEN  

[ChainsawDooM]

it's 1:45 am and I swear I just heard somone walking down the street playing a trumpet  

[ChainsawDooM]

lmao, if you search for "porn" in Windows XP's Help and Support program, it recommends the article on how to use Internet Explorer

(holy, s***, it does!)  

[ChainsawDooM]

so you excited for your interview at RIM?
yep
so then you're hoping to get a rim job?
hell yes
*phex waits for the pun to set in  

[ChainsawDooM]

<_Riddler_> i was in the grocery store today
<_Riddler_> and I got this boner
<_Riddler_> I dunno
<_Riddler_> Maybe it was the melons
Riddler: YOU SAW THE CARROTS  

[ChainsawDooM]

you know you've just experienced an odd moment at 3:30am when you're completely naked making an away msg for aim and your dad (clothed only in breifs) strolls by, waves, and says, "i thought i smelled something. oh well, night!", and walks off  

[Kristabelle015]

i like the a**hole one ^^
actually so did my friends ^^  

[ChainsawDooM]

Pardon my spelling... but I'm from Sweden
pardon my accent, i am from southeast asia
pardon my shotgun, i'm from west virginia  

[ChainsawDooM]

what happens if you try to recharge an alkaline battery
blows up
Don't they explode?
I wonder if it's violent or just some leaking battery acid.
i think it's all a scam to get you to pay more for 'rechargeables' and ---
AHHHHHHHHHHH MY FACE
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  

[ChainsawDooM]

i've got nothing against homos
as long as they don't f*** me or touch me
they're alright
what if they c** on you
that's a grey area  

[ChainsawDooM]

at my school.. the cop from DARE passed around 3 joints to show everyone... and he said "if i dont get all three of these back this schools getting locked down and everyones getting searched till i find it.." and like 30 minutes later when everyone got to see 'em and they got passed back the cop had 4  

[ChainsawDooM]

[16:56] btw
[16:56] your gf sucks at cs
[16:57] lol
[16:57] shes better at other things
[16:57] like quake?
[16:57] lol  

[ChainsawDooM]

[reidman ) why is there an ad for Windows Media Player on the Apple Quicktime site??
[|Dan| ) god only knows why
[|Dan| ) and he's laughing