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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:26 am
-Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- You know what? I'm not gonna bother posting any more. Every time I do, someone takes me seriously and gets butthurt. Even when I try to be funny or civil, someone gets offended. I'm ******** sick of it. Because ragequitting will show us all. This seems a little familiar. I'm not quitting, I'm just gonna start lurking. I think it's a smarter move. >_> Oh yeah, that IS one of the first rules.
LURK MOAR
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:28 am
-Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- You know what? I'm not gonna bother posting any more. Every time I do, someone takes me seriously and gets butthurt. Even when I try to be funny or civil, someone gets offended. I'm ******** sick of it. Because ragequitting will show us all. This seems a little familiar. I'm not quitting, I'm just gonna start lurking. I don't want to fight anymore. I'm done. Whatever. We both know you're too invested in doing stuff for the lulz to quit. That's how you got yourself in this position in the first place.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:35 am
Allegro -Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- You know what? I'm not gonna bother posting any more. Every time I do, someone takes me seriously and gets butthurt. Even when I try to be funny or civil, someone gets offended. I'm ******** sick of it. Because ragequitting will show us all. This seems a little familiar. I'm not quitting, I'm just gonna start lurking. I don't want to fight anymore. I'm done. Whatever. We both know you're too invested in doing stuff for the lulz to quit. That's how you got yourself in this position in the first place. Whatever; it's too late to play the pity card, so I'm not going to bother telling you why I don't need this right now. I'll be posting a lot less from now on. Judge me for it how you will, because I've never cared and I'm not about to start now. End conversation.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:41 am
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:45 am
-Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- You know what? I'm not gonna bother posting any more. Every time I do, someone takes me seriously and gets butthurt. Even when I try to be funny or civil, someone gets offended. I'm ******** sick of it. Because ragequitting will show us all. This seems a little familiar. I'm not quitting, I'm just gonna start lurking. I don't want to fight anymore. I'm done. Whatever. We both know you're too invested in doing stuff for the lulz to quit. That's how you got yourself in this position in the first place. Whatever; it's too late to play the pity card, so I'm not going to bother telling you why I don't need this right now. I'll be posting a lot less from now on. Judge me for it how you will, because I've never cared and I'm not about to start now. End conversation. It's not worth it to tell you what a hypocrit you're being right now. I'll just wait until you get insecure and need compliments from nerds to feel better. So, see you in 2 days. Bye.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:59 am
Allegro -Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- Allegro -Zephyrotica- You know what? I'm not gonna bother posting any more. Every time I do, someone takes me seriously and gets butthurt. Even when I try to be funny or civil, someone gets offended. I'm ******** sick of it. Because ragequitting will show us all. This seems a little familiar. I'm not quitting, I'm just gonna start lurking. I don't want to fight anymore. I'm done. Whatever. We both know you're too invested in doing stuff for the lulz to quit. That's how you got yourself in this position in the first place. Whatever; it's too late to play the pity card, so I'm not going to bother telling you why I don't need this right now. I'll be posting a lot less from now on. Judge me for it how you will, because I've never cared and I'm not about to start now. End conversation. It's not worth it to tell you what a hypocrit you're being right now. I'll just wait until you get insecure and need compliments from nerds to feel better. So, see you in 2 days. Bye. Since when do you guys compliment me? If anything, you make me gradually feel worse about myself till I need to go out and bang an otaku to make myself feel even the smallest bit wanted. Some days it makes me sick to my stomach. Today it all hit me and made me cry. I don't feel like I belong here; I feel alone and unwelcome, but if I leave it means I'm just angry? Come on, Allegro, you're not Kuzo. Think outside the memes. I want to change who I am. I don't like myself, and I don't want to be myself anymore. But if you guys don't believe I can change, then I either can't change, or have to find people who will believe I can, because I can't ******** do it on my own. I'm not in a mental state to keep up this 'i'm a hardass b***h who doesnt afraid of nothing' attitude. In short, I'm trying to grow up a little. Stop trying to bring me back down, because it will work.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:04 pm
If you want to grow up, how about trying to connect with us instead of leaving us? Yes, you're active, and yes, you're funny, and yes, I enjoy your company, but do we even know each other? I don't even know your first name. You probably only know mine because of Max.
I get it. Part of what you do is a way to shelter yourself from anything negative. I've done that. While it felt good in the short term, long term you're going to neuter your growth.
I flunked out of college because I didn't want to take chances. Don't leave us because you don't want to take a chance. neutral
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:09 pm
@ LPS- > heart ? Hugz? sad
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:09 pm
You've all got good heads on your shoulders.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:09 pm
TtheHero You've all got good heads on your shoulders. Why, thanks T!
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:22 pm
To be honest, I feel intimidated by all of you. I hold you in much higher regards than I do myself, and sometimes I don't even think I'm worth your guys' time. It sounds kinda dumb to say it out loud, but I've kind of put the people I like most up on a pedestal.
I've dealt with social anxiety my whole life (it was once so bad I couldn't even walk into a convenience store and buy something), and my coping mechanism has been the aloof and uncaring mask. I push you away because I'm scared of you finding flaws in me. It's the same reason I can't keep a man, or a job, or have anything stable in my life.
I'm afraid if I keep going on like this I'm going to turn into a hiki... hiko... that long word that Hash used for hermit.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:25 pm
-Zephyrotica- To be honest, I feel intimidated by all of you. I hold you in much higher regards than I do myself, and sometimes I don't even think I'm worth your guys' time. It sounds kinda dumb to say it out loud, but I've kind of put the people I like most up on a pedestal. I've dealt with social anxiety my whole life (it was once so bad I couldn't even walk into a convenience store and buy something), and my coping mechanism has been the aloof and uncaring mask. I push you away because I'm scared of you finding flaws in me. It's the same reason I can't keep a man, or a job, or have anything stable in my life. I'm afraid if I keep going on like this I'm going to turn into a hiki... hiko... that long word that Hash used for hermit. D:
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:26 pm
Not you Cheesio. You're British. The only thing that scares me is your teeth. xd heart
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:26 pm
Zeph, you just described what i was like before I started going to therapy. Honestly, i'm not trying to say this...well, I don't know what i'm saying. Here, let me try again
You might want to consider therapy. It's a great way to overcome that stuff. Without it, I don't know if Allegro and I would still have that trip to Venice coming up.
(lol get it because its almost like we're gay)
But really. I think you're funny. Just be yourself. You don't have to hide.
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Posted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 12:28 pm
-Zephyrotica- I've dealt with social anxiety my whole life (it was once so bad I couldn't even walk into a convenience store and buy something), and my coping mechanism has been the aloof and uncaring mask. I push you away because I'm scared of you finding flaws in me. It's the same reason I can't keep a man, or a job, or have anything stable in my life. None of this is news to me, I figured that out a long time ago. xd Listen, I've dealt with SAD all my life. But what helped me was reading things like Kierkegaard, who believes that the value in our lives is found through our experiences and the connections we make. When I was in AmeriCorps, I was constantly in a vulnerable position, but the experiences I went through shaped me into who I am: more confident, more able to accept my flaws. We're nothing like that kind of experience, but we can help. The worst thing you can do is deny yourself that.
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