Corrupt A Wish (C'mon... you know you want to...)

[Randomly Gone Insane]

Granted.
The eraser doesn't work. Rather than erasing your mistakes, it just blackens the paper.

I wish my office chair would stop hurting my back.  

[Zahzi]

Granted. NOW SPIKES ON THE SEAT MAKE IT HURT ON THE BOTTOM!!

I wish I had more blackening pencils!  

[Sielent]

Granted. But now all the paper you can find is black paper.

I wish I had the cat that goes "Ohhhhhh!" from the movie Puss in Boots  

[Zahzi]

Granted. BUT IT NEVER SHUTS UP!

I wish I had a white pen now.  

[Randomly Gone Insane]

Granted. You're given white paper to write on with the white pen, as your black paper is taken away, along with your stupid pencils.

I wish I could see my LIVE friends again. emotion_0A0  

[Zahzi]

Granted. But we're ALL WATCHING NETFLIX!  

[Randomly Gone Insane]

You mother ******** grant you a wish but it's my turn.

I wish I had NetFlix.  

[Zahzi]

Granted.
BUFFERING...........BUFFERING...........BUFFERING............LOST CONNECTION!

I wish turtles could fly.  

[Sielent]

Granted. But because they're bad at it they keep falling on property, denting cars, breaking windows, etc.

I wish my food would arrive already!  

[Randomly Gone Insane]

Granted. But it's covered in maggots.

I wish I wasn't sleepy.  

[Sielent]

Bleck!

Granted. Your computer gets taken away so you'll go to sleep.

I wish I didn't have such a forgetful brain.  

[Zahzi]

Granted. You now recall exiting the womb. TRAUMA EMINENT!

I wish I COULD sleep!  

[Sielent]

Granted. You now fall asleep in the worst moments.

I wish magical powers were real.  

[Zahzi]

Granted. But your powers SUCK!

I wish for matches!  

[Sielent]

Granted. But they're all used so you can't ever use them again!

I wish I didn't have work tomorrow.