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 Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2012 7:08 pm
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 10:20 am
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I got another military joke off a website.
Comparison of military operational tactics (Snake model)
Infantry:
Snake smells them, leaves area.
Airborne:
Lands on and kills the snake.
Armor:
Runs over snake, laughs, and looks for more snakes.
Air Force:
Has exact GPS coordinates to snake.
Can't find snake. Returns to base for refuel, crew rest and manicure.
Ranger:
Plays with snake, then eats it.
Field Artillery:
Kills snake with massive Time On Target barrage
with three Forward Artillery Brigades in support. Kills several
hundred civilians as unavoidable collateral damage. Mission is
considered a success and all participants (i.e., cooks, mechanics
and clerks) are awarded Silver Stars.
Special Forces:
Makes contact with snake, ignores all State
Department directives and Theater Commander Rules of Engagement by
building rapport with snake and winning its heart and mind. Trains it
to kill other snakes. Files enormous travel settlement upon return.
Combat Engineer:
Studies snake. Prepares in-depth doctrinal
thesis in obscure 5 series Field Manual about how to defeat snake using
counter mobility assets. Complains that maneuver forces don't
understand how to properly conduct doctrinal counter-snake ops.
Navy SEAL:
Expends all ammunition and calls for naval gunfire
support in failed attempt to kill snake. Snake bites SEAL and
retreats to safety. Hollywood makes fantasy film in which SEALS
kill Muslim extremist snakes.
Navy:
Fires off 50 cruise missiles from various types of ships,
kills snake and makes presentation to Senate Appropriations
Committee on how Naval forces are the most cost-effective means of
anti-snake Force projection.
Marine:
Kills snake by accident while looking for souvenirs.
Local civilians demand removal of all US forces from Area ofOperations.
Marine Recon:
Follows snake, gets lost.
(Might be hard to understand for some...)
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 5:37 pm
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 9:02 pm
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dragonf121 rolled 20 100-sided dice:
42, 67, 37, 5, 69, 10, 60, 43, 33, 39, 70, 100, 33, 24, 58, 36, 28, 86, 65, 67
Total: 972 (20-2000)
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 2:37 am
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Cinna101 dragonf121 (God don't let me make a fool out of myself with a bad joke) An Air Force cargo plane was preparing for departure from Thule Air Base in Greenland. They were waiting on the truck to arrive to pump out the aircraft's sewage holding tank. The aircraft commander was in a hurry, the truck was late in arriving, and the Airman performing the job was extreamly slow in getting the tank pumped out. When the commander berated the Airman for his slowness and promised punishment, the Airman responded: "Sir, I have no stripes, it is 20 below, I'm stationed in Greenland, and I'm pumping sewage out of airplanes. Just what are you going to do to punish me?" lol took me a minute to get this one but its funny >_<
Lol i got plenty more where that came from so if you want more just say so |
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 10:23 am
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Rexxie Alex What do you call someone with only one eye and one leg? ...... ...... ...... An IHOP. |
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 2:55 pm
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Cinna101 Rexxie Alex What do you call someone with only one eye and one leg? ...... ...... ...... An IHOP. haha quick and hilarious. very nice ^^
This joke always makes me want pancakes. x3 |
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 3:22 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 3:34 pm
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Jonstalker62 Halcyonic Wolf I got another military joke off a website. Comparison of military operational tactics (Snake model) Hahaha, Oh my god, you don't know how on the dot this joke is.
I'm glad someone got it ^^
My favorite was the one about the SEALs. I will never understand why some people worship them. |
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 6:44 pm
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Halcyonic Wolf Jonstalker62 Halcyonic Wolf I got another military joke off a website. Comparison of military operational tactics (Snake model) Hahaha, Oh my god, you don't know how on the dot this joke is. I'm glad someone got it ^^ My favorite was the one about the SEALs. I will never understand why some people worship them. |
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 6:48 pm
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dragonf121 Cinna101 dragonf121 (God don't let me make a fool out of myself with a bad joke) An Air Force cargo plane was preparing for departure from Thule Air Base in Greenland. They were waiting on the truck to arrive to pump out the aircraft's sewage holding tank. The aircraft commander was in a hurry, the truck was late in arriving, and the Airman performing the job was extreamly slow in getting the tank pumped out. When the commander berated the Airman for his slowness and promised punishment, the Airman responded: "Sir, I have no stripes, it is 20 below, I'm stationed in Greenland, and I'm pumping sewage out of airplanes. Just what are you going to do to punish me?" lol took me a minute to get this one but its funny >_< Lol i got plenty more where that came from so if you want more just say so |
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Reply
