Welcome to Gaia! ::

Thanks for the offer, but I can't. I've already joined too many guilds, and really with my college work I shouldn't be opening up any more distractions.

God Gaara's english voice is depressing...

Oh s**t, my bad crying

*gives a chocolate chip cookie*

there ya go.

yay!

@claru: I could have some fun....

I bet a good joke will breathe some life into this place...

Alright once upon a time (its one of those long story jokes) there was a hunter named John. Now, John loved to hunt, but because of a shoulder injury he couldn't aim the gun very well. It was for this reason that John kept a pet parrot on his shoulder, as the extra weight let him aim.

Anyways one day John was hunting in the woods when he saw this great big buck. John thanked God for blessing him with this kill and aimed his rifle at the buck. He fired, but missed and the buck ran away. "BULL s**t!" he shouted, and the parrot on his shoulder said, "Braawk, BULL s**t!" Disappointed, John went back to his truck and started driving back to down along a dusty country road. Suddenly a great big bird flew over his truck and took a dump right on his windshield and then landed on a nearby branch. Well John stopped his truck on the spot, got out, and aimed his rifle at the bird. He shot, but missed and the bird flew away. "GOD!" he shouted, and the parrot on his should chirped "Braawk, God!"

Anyways John got back in his truck and took off down the dusty country road. He kept going until he saw a great big bull standing in the middle of the road. John beeped his horn, shouted at it, pushed it, but it wouldn't move. "Oh man, what am I going to do he won't move, he won't budge." he said to himself. Then an idea popped into his head and he said, "I know! I'll stick a stick up his a**, he'll move!" and the parrot on his shoulder chirped, "Bwaark stick a stick up his a**, he'll move!"

Finally John made it back into town, and realized at that moment that it was Sunday and about time for church to start. Well, John hadn't been to church for a long time, and with his recent bad luck he decided to attend. As soon as he got in the preacher greeted him with open arms and a large smile, saying things like "Oh John you're back! Bless the heavens. Oh John you shouldn't miss a church session ever again. If you do that you'll go to heaven and obtain love, peace, and eternal salvation forevermore! Suddenly the parrot on John's shoulder chirped, "Bwaark BULL s**t!" Everyone in church gasped and the preacher's face instantly grew red. "Who told you that!?" he shouted at the parrot, who pleasantly responded, "Bwaark, GOD!" The preacher fainted and all of the people in church rushed to his side, shouting "Oh no, the preacher won't move, he won't budge!" The parrot chirped again, "Bwaark, stick a stick up his a**, he'll move!"

lol

Wow just wow


A guy walks into a bar and asks for a glass of beer, and the bartender says, "That'll be four cents, please."

The guy nearly spits out his beer. "Four cents?!" he says in amazement. "How much for a plate of fish and chips with extra mashed potatoes and gravy and a side order of peas?"

"Eleven cents," says the bartender.

The customer says he's going to recommend this place to all of his friends because of the low prices. "Wow!" he exclaims. "Where's the manager so I can thank him for these low prices and shake his hand?"

"Upstairs," says the bartender, "with my wife."

"What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" the customer asks.

"Same thing I'm doing to his bar and his money," the bartender calmly replies.

OR

A Scotsman, American, and an Irishman are in a bar.
They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place.

Then the Scotsman says, "Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Glasgow, there's a better one. At MacDougal's, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will buy your third drink!"

The others agree that sounds like a good place.

Then the American says, "Yeah,that's a nice bar, but where I come from, there's a better one. Over in Brooklyn, there's this place, Vinny's. At Vinny's, you buy a drink, Vinny buys you a drink. You buy another drink, Vinny buys you another drink."

Everyone agrees that sounds like a great bar.

Then the Irishman says, "You think that's great? Where I come from in Dublin, there's this place called Murphy's. At Murphy's, they buy you your first drink, they buy you your second drink, they buy you your third drink, and then, they take you in the back and get you laid!"

"Wow!" say the other two. "That's fantastic! Did that actually happen to you?"

"No," replies the Irish guy, "but it happened to me sister!"