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 Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 7:33 am
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Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:02 pm
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OK, this is TOTALLY random. But, methinks RE has - as NotteRequiem said it - taken over my Gaia Xmas Event! XDDDD
I just got paired with the orphan named Patches, and later one named Buttercup, and they did nothing but make raccoon (like the animal) references the entire time. But some of them are PRICELESS.
Patches :
*hack* *cough* Owie, I'm having a hard time breathing. It feels like Mr. Raccoon is sitting on my chest again.
T-Virus, anyone?
Patches :
Sometimes Mr. Raccoon will just stare at you for hours with his little red eyes.
So THAT'S what little kids call Wesker...
Patches :
Mr. Raccoon is proud of his opposable thumbs.
When I look at a Tyrant, I don't exactly think THUMB.
Patches :
The orphanage is home to diverse wildlife.
Cerberus, Hunters, and Neptunes - Just to name a few!
Patches :
Mr. Raccoon always hangs out with Mr. Skunk, but I think he's a bad influence.
Hear that, Birkin? You're a bad influence!!
Patches:
Once one of us stepped on Mr. Raccoon's tail. We had to offer Billy in repentance. Poor Billy.
Well, that explains why he hasn't been in any sequels!
Patches:
If Mr. Raccoon finds out I'm leaving the orphanage, he'll be mad!
Orphanage, Spencer Estate; same difference...
Patches:
Some people will tell you that a raccoon can't take control of a small building.
Wanna BET?
Patches :
I... I can't remember the last time I've been this happy! I think I'm ready to leave Mr. Raccoon behind and get adopted!
Have you had all your shots, Patches? I mean REALLY??
Patches :
Wow, this has been the best Xmas ever! Not even a rabid racoon could ruin it. I think I'm ready to be adopted now!
Give 'em time, Patches. Give 'em time...
Patches:
We once had a rug, but Mr. Raccoon decided it'd be his bathroom. I wish I had a rug to play on... even just a little...
Wow, I didn't know Wesker wasn't toilet-trained...
(From NotteRequiem) Patches :
Ms. Cooper tried to get Mr. Raccoon out of the attic, but when she came back she was a different person. She seemed broken, somehow.
Woah, since when did Lisa change her last name to Cooper??
(From NotteRequiem) Patches:
I was scared of Mr. Raccoon until he saved me from that rabid tapir.
Tapirs - The natural enemy of the great Weskness.
Buttercup :
Mr. Raccoon punished us most dearly when we tried to offer him hardtack. I miss those tooth-breaking biscuits *grumble*
What's the matter, Wesker? Super-powers, but brittle teeth??
Buttercup :
I wish I had some hardtack from the orphanage. We used to have soft cookies, but Mr. Raccoon demanded all the chewy food.
MAKE UP YOUR MIND, WESKER!!
Buttercup:
I've learned to sleep with my eyes open.
I'll bet you did, kiddo.
Buttercup:
I sure wish I had that Hoop and Stick again. Mr. Raccoon ruins all of our toys.
Now, Albert! Play nicely with the other children!
Buttercup:
I could entertain myself for hours with a Hoop and Stick, and defend myself against future raccoon attacks!
Don't you mean attacks ON raccoon??
Buttercup:
Sometimes I think I hear weeping in Mr. Raccoon's attic, but it must just be the rain.
Yeah, Lisa WAS pretty traumatized...
Buttercup:
The other orphans pretend that Mr. Raccoon doesn't exist just to get by.
Now why would you pretend Wesker doesn't exist?!
Buttercup:
Ms. Cooper says I've developed an acute case of agrizoophobia. What does that mean?
It's a fear of wild animals, dear. So, best to avoid Doctor Marcus!
Buttercup:
We had a Hoop and Stick at the orphanage. We broke the stick fighting off Mr. Raccoon when he had that bout with rabies...
Wesker never did get over that...
Buttercup:
Mr. Raccoon bit me once, but only because I disrespected him.
Wesker loooves children...With salt...And butter...
Buttercup:
Mr. Raccoon isn't so bad, if you don't look at him directly in the eyes.
Yeah, something about cat eyes on a human just...Ain't right.
Buttercup:
You should see Mr. Raccoon's human tooth collection. It's very impressive.
Wesker likes to keep a little piece of his experiments around. ...For sentimental reasons, of course!
Buttercup:
Brrrrr. I haven't felt this cold since Mr. Raccoon made be give up my blanket. I think I'm sick.
ALBERT! What did I say about playing nice?!
Buttercup:
Mr. Raccoon lives in the attic. He controls the orphanage from the kitchens to the common areas.
Today, ze orphanage! Tomorrow, ze vurld!
Buttercup:
One time, Mr. Raccoon and Mr. Skunk cornered me and stole my shoes.
Look at this, Albert! Now you've got William helping you!
Buttercup:
If the orphanage wasn't so poor, we could get rid of that pesky raccoon! (Oh no, don't tell him I said that!)
Pesky...? You dare call the great Weskness PESKY?!
Buttercup:
I used to have a teddy bear, but ever since Mr. Raccoon moved in, I've been afraid of small mammals.
Hey, the great Weskness isn't SMALL either. I guess he IS a mammal though...
(From NotteRequeim) Buttercup:
Only Ms. Cooper's ever been in Mr. Racoon's attic.
Umm...I'm thinking..."EWW!".
Buttercup:
Wow, this has been the best Xmas ever! Not even a rabid raccoon could ruin it. I think I'm ready to be adopted now!
Poor rabid Wesker...So unloved...
I dunno why I find this so stupidly amusing. XD There was another about "getting rid of that pesky raccoon", but I didn't get to copy it...
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Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:19 pm
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Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 9:27 pm
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Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 11:15 am
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Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 11:18 am
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Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 1:11 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 10:51 am
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 11:31 am
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 12:01 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 6:23 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 7:08 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 8:28 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 9:05 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 9:25 pm
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Reply
