Things Resident Evil characters would NEVER say

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Merchant: 'Ello Stranger, do you want a cell phone? It's got unlimited texting for only 2400 pesentas a month.  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Merchant: You like these products, huh? Well, how you YOU like to become a merchant? What you have to do is fill out this form and they'll send all the weapons to your place. Now, you have to sell them by the end of the month, and then they'll send you another case! It's as simple as that!  

[NotteRequiem]

Biohazard EXTREME

Merchant: You like these products, huh? Well, how you YOU like to become a merchant? What you have to do is fill out this form and they'll send all the weapons to your place. Now, you have to sell them by the end of the month, and then they'll send you another case! It's as simple as that!

celestial fox frenzi

Merchant: 'Ello Stranger, do you want a cell phone? It's got unlimited texting for only 2400 pesentas a month

Leon: Oh, okay.... :: Digs deep into his pockets....::



Oh wait...  

[Duke Rion]

ANY RE character: I wanna make love to that zombie  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Duke Rion The Emo

ANY RE character: I wanna make love to that zombie

You never know.  

[A5116278]

Wesker: That pink tutu looks rather nice.  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Alice to an Alice clone: If you only knew what it's like to be me.  

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Kevin: Wow, I'm the ONLY cop to survive this mess?
Leon: Nope, I did too.
Kevin: Well that's cuz you had a secret agent help you.
Leon: So? You had seven other people!
Kevin: ...  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Kevin and the seven survivors meet up with Leon and Ada.
Kevin takes a look at Ada.
"Trade you all of them for her."  

[Canas Renvall]

xd Niiice...

Sergei: "I'm not crazy! Really! You're crazy! Mwahahahaha!"  

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Biohazard EXTREME

Kevin and the seven survivors meet up with Leon and Ada.
Kevin takes a look at Ada.
"Trade you all of them for her."

What if the story progressed onward like that!? It would be one helluva different game...  

[UmbraGallus]

Umbrella Chronicles with Chris and Jill:

Chris: Jill, the ladder

Chris: Jill, the Chandeliar

Chris:Jill, SANDWICH!!!  

[UmbraGallus]

Leon to Saddler

*leon walks in to the final fight*

Leon: Die monster, you don't belong in this world.

Saddler:...?

leon:You steal men's souls, and make them your slaves.

Saddler:...uh...

leon: your words are as empty as your soul. mankind ill needs a savior such as you.

Saddler: *finally gets what's going on* What is a man!? a miserable little pile of secrets. but enough talk, have at you! *transforms*  

[Vankala]

In-Umbrella-We-Trust

Leon to Saddler

*leon walks in to the final fight*

Leon: Die monster, you don't belong in this world.

Saddler:...?

leon:You steal men's souls, and make them your slaves.

Saddler:...uh...

leon: your words are as empty as your soul. mankind's ill needs a savior such as you.

Saddler: *finally gets what's going on* What is a man!? a miserable little pile of secrets. but enough talk, have at you! *transforms*

Castlevania meets Resident Evil!!! xd  

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Ark Thompson to Chris and Leon on a gameshow.

Ark: For the win.... What was the name of the song that had to be played in the first resident evil so you could find the golden plate?

...
BZZT!
Ark: Chris?
Chris: Frank Sonatra!
Leon: Pfft, I believe the title was 'Fly me to the moon light sonata!'
Ark: You're both idiots, but Leon is closer... Which is odd, because he wasn't even in that game.