You're Asked To Say Grace... What Do You Say?

[PathlessPlot]

Teoka

I don't say it, which provides for a bit of awkwardness with my boyfriend's family. I keep to myself, wait until they're done, and then eat. *shrugs*

I often eat with my boyfriend's family and they always grab hands and say grace. I just take the hands I am supposed to and let them bow their heads. I don't think they've noticed yet that I never bow my head, close my eyes, or say Amen. Or they may not care, but I doubt that because they are always nagging Donald to go to church with them. I don't know.  

[Henneth Annun]

"Thank me, for working hard and earning money so I can afford the delicious Chinese food I have delivered to the house. Writing down that phone number was a really good idea."

"Thank you enzymes, for always digesting the nutrients I injest swiftly and expertly. May my stomach ever have a PH below 2. Amen."

"One of these days I will work a Voltaire quote into grace. Hopefully it will be sometime soon. Amen."

"Thank you. Or if you prefer: Merci beaucoup. Danke schön. Muchos gracias. Tack så mycket. "

"TY man! Let's eat!"  

[Mistress Autumn Carlotta]

Usually Idk what to do! I'll take whoever's hands and kinda keep quiet or mumble along.  

[Alloflifedecays]

I use that Simpsons one "Dear God, we paid for this food, so thanks for nothing."  

[Atheistic Sunday]

"May I be excused?..."

 

[Paraldehyde Kool-Aid]

Hm. Y'know, I might actually have to face that one at some point. Last several times, I've been able to pass the buck. But, there's a large chunk of me that would really like to make my Pentecostal missionary step-aunt squirm. Thankfully, I have not actually seen her in the better part of a decade, but that may shortly change. Sigh.

1. To all those fine hard-working folks in the agricultural, transportation and food-distribution industries: Huzzah. To the cooks of this fine meal: Wassail. To us: Dig in. Food's getting cold.

2. Edeturi te salutamus. (We who are about to eat salute you. It's a spoof off the old gladiatorial salute.)

3. Well, I would say grace, but I don't think God's gonna like it very much. I mean, this isn't goat meat and you didn't even burn it properly!  

[=X-Sparker + AquaKiller=]

"Grace... Dibs on the chicken leg (or whatever the hell I want)!"

 

[Labtech Soosh]

I too have had to face this dilemma at a certain point, but you want to know what I did? I ignored them and started eating. Food is food, and they're talking at the dinner table. If they want to say grace it's all fine by me, but I'm going to eat my food while they do it. Food is made to be eaten, not made to be thanked for.

And if you're wondering, that time was at Thanksgiving.

 

[Apocryphal Quintessence]

I simply do as I was asked and say "Grace" ;D That's all there is to it.  

[KCXerro013]

true story

my friend came out of the kitchen with a plate of chicken and vegetable stir fry . i asked for some and he said " you have to say grace first ... bless the food and thank god for it an ill let you have some "

i said " ******** that ... its not worth it "

he laughed and gave me some anyways

hes semi religious and im very .... not

and he knows it  

[Athena_Ritashe]

I think it would depend on the people asking. If it was family I would tell them to do it instead since they know I'm not christian. If it was a family I didn't know I guess I would do a brief "thank you for the food god thing"  

[Shounen-Ai Fangirl Moegi]

Dear white male God, thanks for the food, but meatloaf isn't my favorite. Could you possibly make ravioli an item for tomorrow night? Amen.  

[Prince Rilian]

"Dear God, thank you for making lasagna taste so good to us."

No wait, that's what a guy actually said once. Everyone in the room started laughing and one guy was like, "What the ******** kind of prayer is that!?"

I have a better idea. "Dear Santa, please bring me a bike this year, and please bring all of my family members whatever they desire. Yours truly, Rilian."

Alloflifedecays

I use that Simpsons one "Dear God, we paid for this food, so thanks for nothing."

That's amusing, but it reminds me of the Veggie Tales thing about the guy who never worked for anything in his life and never asked for anything, except to pray to God, and then a milk truck would break down in front of his house, or the baker down the street would give him surplus bread. Those are the fine christian morals: Never work for anything.  

[migoto-kami]

It gets kind of awkward when my own family knows that I'm an atheist and they ask me to say grace. So I just use the "God is great, God is good let us thank him for our food. Amen." I find it easier to go along with it than fight it.  

[SpontaniousSteve]

im really rude about it, i stare at the wall and start eating.