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 Posted: Sat May 02, 2009 2:02 pm
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Posted: Mon May 04, 2009 11:35 am
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Posted: Tue May 05, 2009 11:47 pm
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Lolz I found this in someone's profile and thought it was funny!
Quotes/ words that should be in Harry Potter but Aren’t:
- “Geez, Voldemort, stop acting so gay!”
- Fabulous
- “Bellatrix, stop groping me. Just…just…go stand over there.”
- “Tell me Lucius, who’s the prettiest ballerina of them all?” Voldemort gave a cold smile at the clearly horrified man.
- “Sooo, what’s REALLY going on between his lordship and that snake, hmm?”
-“Wait a minute,” Harry said. “You want me to put this Snitch where now?”
- “What we need,” Voldemort mused, “is some sort of sign that people can rally around. To keep the masses happy and unrebellious.” Snape gasped. “You mean-” “Yes.” Voldemort allowed a vicious, cold smile to play upon his lips. “What the Death Eaters need, is a theme song.”
- “NO, DAMMIT! I DON’T CARE IF THE POTTER BOY’S BEEN FOUND! AMERICAN IDOL IS ON!”
- “One of you go see if the boy is alive. No, don’t poke him with that, Fenrir!”
- Flirtatious
- Glittery
- ***** that Malfoy boy is sexy.” “GINNY!” “What, I was just saying-”
- Hoshit!
- “Harry Potter, you pathetic twit. Come here so I can smack you properly.”
- “GODDAMMIT, now is not the time for that! We are out here, risking our lives and fighting off Death Eaters, and they are making-out in a girls’ restroom?”
- “Sucks for you, Harry!”
- “Well, the mushrooms looked edible!”
- “Kreacher, how exactly do you snog a pair of trousers? Wait-Don’t answer tha-KREACHER, NOOO!”
-“My Lord, with all due respect, if you do not undo whatever you did to my hair in the next FIVE SECONDS, your eyes won’t be the only things that are slitted.”
- Freaking
-Voldemort rushed on through the night towards his last Horcrux, a crazed look in his eyes. Potter had gotten the ring, he had gotten the locket, but Voldemort would be damned if the blasted boy was going to lay one finger on his bunny slippers!
-“Perhaps Draco will baby-sit the cubs!” “Does Lucius Malfoy have to curse a b***h?”
- “Screw guarding Sirius Black’s old house; let’s go get drunk!”
- “What are you doing here?” Harry asked, bewildered. Draco spun around, did a double-take, then glared at Harry and made an obscene hand gesture.
- “HERMIONE! HERMIONE! HERMIO-” Ron was cut off suddenly when Harry smacked him and yelled “For God’s sake, SHUT THE HELL UP!”
- “I’ll get you, Harry Potter, and your little owl, too!”
-“Snape has a female patronus? Alright, Severus, what aren’t you telling us?”
- Voldemort glared angrily at the house-elf carrying the offending meal. “The Dark Lord,” he explained slowly, “does NOT eat muffins!”
-“Why? Why isn’t it possible?” The Dark Lord raged at his cowering victim. “Tell me WHY!” He snarled as he paced furiously. “My lord, have you considered the possibility that you’re taking your loss to this muggle game a bit too seriously?” Lucius Malfoy offered meekly. “NO I’M NOT TAKING IT TOO SERIOUSLY!” Voldemort roared. “IF I AM TO HAVE A WEAKNESS, IT IS NOT GOING TO BE DDR!”
- “Kreacher angry! Kreacher SMASH!”
-Ron, Hermione, and Harry all stood around the body of their fallen foe. “So, whadda’ya reckon?” Ron asked, gazing at the lifeless form of Voldemort. “Boxers or briefs?”
- And thus, Harry never did get a high school education.
- Victor Krum was one sexually frustrated Quidditch Champion.
- The Boy Who Continued to Live nearly died with laughter when the Malfoys turned up to their disciplinary hearing. Lucius Malfoy was wearing a tux, complete with top hat and cane, while his wife wore a pale blue satin ball gown with elbow-length gloves. Draco was wearing blue jeans and a black tee-shirt that said “I was forced to try and kill Albus Dumbledore, I had to put up with Snape for seven years, the Ministry raided my house more times than I have fingers, I couldn’t get away from Delores Umbrage, Death Eaters moved into my house, Voldemort made fun of me and my family, I had to hurt people to stop my parents from being killed, I watched my Mom and Dad tortured, my wand was stolen, I still haven’t won a Quidditch game against Harry Potter, and all I got was this lousy tattoo, and even that went away after Voldemort’s downfall.” It was the start of a long and lasting friendship.
- Harry felt a shiver run down his spine as he listened while the Order discussed Voldemort's new plan of capturing him: hordes of fangirls.
- "Well how was I supposed to know that that Voldemort was a bloody bare-knuckle boxing champion?" said George as he watched the lifeless body of The Boy Who Lived get carried away on stretchers. "I was betting against him you know!"
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Posted: Wed May 06, 2009 6:59 pm
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Posted: Wed May 06, 2009 7:10 pm
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Posted: Thu May 07, 2009 10:15 pm
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Posted: Fri May 08, 2009 12:03 am
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Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 12:49 am
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LOL Here's the most akward-est moment in Scrubs:
J.D.: Look, uh... Janitor...
the Janitor rolls his eyes
J.D.: ...I'm gonna be straight with you: I saw your p***s, and I noticed a possible melanoma that you should really have checked out.
Janitor: When did you see my p***s?
J.D.: Last night, when you were showering.
Janitor: Where were you?
J.D.: Oh, I was outside, in the bushes.
the Janitor takes a second to process this answer
Janitor: Uhhh...
J.D.: Look, it was just a coincidence, man - I mean, i-i-if you had looked out the window, you'd have seen my p***s, you know!
Janitor: What? Why?
J.D.: Because I had it out while I was looking at yours!
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 10:16 pm
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More ridonculus Resident Evil Quotes:
"No way, Leon." "Way." -Leon and Ashley, being totally lame.
"Do you get all of your ideas from comic book villains?" -Chris, stating the obvious.
"Alfred! Cross dressing freak!" - Claire, stating the obvious (it must run in the family or something).
"You were almost a Jill sandwich!" -Barry, and the most (in)famous Resident Evil quote ever.
"Jill, here's a lockpick. It might come in handy if you, the Master of Unlocking, take it with you." -Barry, with the most WTF?! quote of all time.
"I found this weapon. It's really powerful, especially against living things!" -Barry. rofl
"Oh my gawd! Look how big it's beeecome..." -Steve, being... a creep.
"Jill, have you found anything interesting?" -Barry, shortly after entering a room containing the sizzling corpse of a 50 foot snake on the floor.
"What, did you forget your makeup or something?" -Random Policeman, clearly unaware of the fact that Leon keeps his makeup neatly organized in his briefcase, right next to his guns.
"I know, you want to ask me out. All the foxy ladies love my accent. It drives them crazy." -Carlos, and one of his many cheesy advances on Jill throughout a zombie infested hellhole. xd
"Cli-are." -Steve, and his adorable/annoying mispronunciation of Claire's name. heart
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Posted: Sat Jun 06, 2009 10:31 am
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Posted: Wed Jun 10, 2009 11:17 am
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Posted: Tue Jun 16, 2009 10:49 pm
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Portal Quotes:
"The cake is a lie."
"Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test."
"Uh oh. Somebody cut the cake. I told them to wait for you, but they cut it anyway. There is still some left, though, if you hurry back."
"That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans. Nice job breaking it, hero."
"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the weighted companion cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak."
"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the companion cube cannot speak. In the event that the companion cube does speak, The Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice."
"While it has been a faithful companion, your companion cube cannot accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk, and The Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that it cannot, it would tell you to go on without it because it would rather die in a fire than become burden to you."
"Although the euthanizing process is remarkably painful, 8 out of 10 Aperture Science engineers believe that the companion cube is most likely incapable of feeling much pain."
"I'd just like to point out that you were given every opportunity to succeed. There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to. I invited your best friend the companion cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn't come either because you don't have any other friends. Because of how unlikable you are. It says so here in your personnel file: Unlikable. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikable loner whose passing shall not be mourned. 'Shall not be mourned.' That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official. It also says you were adopted. So that's funny, too."
"Didn't we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I was like, "Goodbye" and you were like "NOOO WAAAY" and I was all "we pretended we were going to murder you". That was great..."
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Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:18 pm
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Posted: Wed Feb 03, 2010 9:33 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 05, 2010 8:46 am
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Reply
