[FIN] Too Cold

[Suudonym]

"What exactly requires your family's backing?" he pursued. "Obviously I don't know everything you do in Kodo, but I know that you've joined the fight against Team Rocket at least once and that you train pokemon. Just from that alone I would bet that the League's Special Operations department would accept you without as much as asking your parents' names."

He inhaled a breath and exhaled it as a quiet sigh, removing his chin from his hand and straightening his posture. It was becoming increasingly evident that his words would have no real effect. "It sounds to me like you didn't actually want advice… It sounds like you just wanted to feel better about your own resignation by arguing with someone who's trying to convince you otherwise." It was frustrating, most likely to her just as much to him, and he couldn't see any benefit in continuing. And so he stood, reaching for the scarf waiting on the back of his chair, and paused to speak just once more - though he had little hope that the words wouldn't just bounce off of her the same as all the others.

"You might not care, but I'll give you one more piece of advice. If you're genuinely more afraid of living a life based on your own merits and choices than you are of being bound to a life was that decided against your wishes, then go ahead and go back. But if you have any respect left in your heart for your own rights as a human being, don't back down. You're the only person who can live your life; whatever happens, you're the only person who can feel your own suffering or comfort."  

[Tori Honoo]

His question seemed somewhat rhetorical, and though she opened her mouth to respond, she hesitated, deciding just to listen instead, nodding when he finished. "I've considered it..."

By this point, his entire demeanor betrayed his irritation and she felt herself slowly withdrawing yet again, knowing it was no fault of his. She paused, her brows furrowing as she debated if he was right nor not; it was far too easy to second guess everything at this point, a trait she likely wasn't even aware of, or if she was, refused to admit. He was right. He had to be right. Everything he had said so far was reasonable... When he stood, she looked up with a slightly shocked look, almost as if she were about to protest, but instead fell silent, listening instead again.

The words he said stung, and she felt herself tensing a little as if bracing herself for more. When no more came, she looked up at him, still tense as the words had certainly left their impression. The choice was ultimately hers...the aftershocks of her choice, however, were what she feared on both sides. Respect...At this point, she wasn't sure she even deserved any, the feeling only amplified as she realized she was letting herself slip deeper into the pit she had created.

Forcing herself to relax, she nodded. She would have a lot to think about... "Thank you, Luke...For the advice, for listening.... just, thank you..." Another question pressed at her tongue, but she held back. She didn't need to burden him with any more.  

[Suudonym]

He gave a short nod and a quiet "good luck" as he departed from the table and the cafe, forgoing the drink he had earlier considered. He assumed she probably wouldn't want him to linger for that.  

[Tori Honoo]

She watched in silence as he walked away, her mind going blank as the door finally shut behind him. Once he had disappeared, she pushed her tea away, and in a childish and uncharacteristic display of hopelessness, crossed her arms on the table and promptly buried her face in them.

Stress and time were quickly overpowering her, and she decided then and there that she was possibly the most undeserving person in the world.