Custom Bloodline/Clan Application [O p e n]

[The Wild Hunt]

Holy Rinaku

Seems good, but there's one big issue:

It seems to still be fitted to LR. Like, one of the skills costs 500 chakra. And there's .5 and -.5 increases/decreases, which doesn't exist in NUR.

Change that up a bit and it should be good to go, though I'll give it one more review before approving it.  

[The Wild Hunt]

Eplc Death

Approved if you fix a few issues:

Rustle My Jimmies is like, immunity to all genjutsu. lol
You could just say "so and so vows to use this technique every post" when fighting a genj user and bam, there ain't nothin' they can do.

"I do what I want",

Limitless? When does this technique end? Can it end? O_o

Black magic woman, heal fatal wounds for B rank. Lul
A would be fine.

Acidic Control... I'm iffy on it. If you use it to manipulate people's natural acids then I'll ban it without a second thought. Or even something along those lines. Otherwise it's okay.

"My True Slug Power"

is OP.

It's like a way worse version of the Flower of the Trees or whatever, the SS Mokuton technique.

EDIT: Approved  

[The Wild Hunt]

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Yotsuki:
I read the jutsu and everything else, and thought this was really weak until looking at the cloaks. O_o

The fire one for example...

I'm not sure how I feel about this clan. It seems just like stat/bonus hacking rather than an original concept that adds something to the guild, ya know?  

[The Wild Hunt]

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Sarutobi:

It seems fine.

My one issue is that elemental clones cost 5 CP no matter what the rank. Spam a billion S rank clones for 5 chakra each = GG?  

[theholyest]

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Sarutobi:

It seems fine.

My one issue is that elemental clones cost 5 CP no matter what the rank. Spam a billion S rank clones for 5 chakra each = GG?

you can only make 4 per post, up to 12. i dont mind moving it down to 3 per post, up to 9 if u prefere  

[The Wild Hunt]

TheWingsOfTheGods

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Sarutobi:

It seems fine.

My one issue is that elemental clones cost 5 CP no matter what the rank. Spam a billion S rank clones for 5 chakra each = GG?

you can only make 4 per post, up to 12. i dont mind moving it down to 3 per post, up to 9 if u prefere

Doesn't really fix the issue.

You're getting up to 90CP worth of jutsu casting for 15 every post. lol  

[theholyest]

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Yotsuki:
I read the jutsu and everything else, and thought this was really weak until looking at the cloaks. O_o

The fire one for example...

I'm not sure how I feel about this clan. It seems just like stat/bonus hacking rather than an original concept that adds something to the guild, ya know?

i understand where your coming from with that. the Idea was more of NinTaijutsu bloodline. if you want, i can see what i can do about removing or limiting the stat boosts on the Cloaks  

[theholyest]

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Sarutobi:

It seems fine.

My one issue is that elemental clones cost 5 CP no matter what the rank. Spam a billion S rank clones for 5 chakra each = GG?

you can only make 4 per post, up to 12. i dont mind moving it down to 3 per post, up to 9 if u prefere

Doesn't really fix the issue.

You're getting up to 90CP worth of jutsu casting for 15 every post. lol

I could raise the Cost to 10cp then too, and make S-rank or higher clone jutsu exempt from the ruling.  

[The Wild Hunt]

TheWingsOfTheGods

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Shane-senpai

TheWingsOfTheGods

Regarding Sarutobi:

It seems fine.

My one issue is that elemental clones cost 5 CP no matter what the rank. Spam a billion S rank clones for 5 chakra each = GG?

you can only make 4 per post, up to 12. i dont mind moving it down to 3 per post, up to 9 if u prefere

Doesn't really fix the issue.

You're getting up to 90CP worth of jutsu casting for 15 every post. lol

I could raise the Cost to 10cp then too, and make S-rank or higher clone jutsu exempt from the ruling.

I'll accept that. Tell me when you make the edits and I'll add it to the list.

As for Yotsuki, I don't know. Maybe you should evolve on the cloaks. Make them do similar things, or completely remove the 'elemental' aspect. Give the cloak techniques that make it original. Have it do useful things. Almost like making the clan a mobile Susano'o armor with extra niches.

That's the best way I could see this broad idea getting through without either being too weak, too strong, or just too plain.  

[Cappey-San]

Shane-senpai

The Courageous Wolf

It's perfect to go, but one issue.

It says shadow manipulation techniques are stronger in the shadows.

Need specifics. +1 Rank? o-o

Whoops, sorry i left that incomplete. It was either +1 Rank, or it moved faster through shadows, but I think going with +1 in rank might just be easier.  

[The Wild Hunt]

The Courageous Wolf

Shane-senpai

The Courageous Wolf

It's perfect to go, but one issue.

It says shadow manipulation techniques are stronger in the shadows.

Need specifics. +1 Rank? o-o

Whoops, sorry i left that incomplete. It was either +1 Rank, or it moved faster through shadows, but I think going with +1 in rank might just be easier.

Okay. I'll edit that in and add it to the list.  

[Sorgaren]

Clan or Bloodline: Clan

xxxxxxxxxxKurashi Kaen
[ Living, Fire, Ablaze ]

xxxxxHISTORY
The Kurashi Kaen clan was a well-known, established family from the Land of Fire. For the longest time, they were known for their superiority in the use of Katon, their flames seemingly coming alive. Although the reputation of this clan was once great, the recent rise of Suiton users has given the clan much less to boast about. Each clan member seems to have inherited a special kind of 'flame', and as such, each clan member is allowed [1] custom attribute that makes their fire unique.


xxxxxDESCRIPTION

Members of the Kurashi Kaen are the veritable masters of the fire element. More specific examples will be listed below, but it's generally advised to stay well away from them when they're capable of using fire.


xxxxxRULES
• Fire must be your main element
• Your fire's attribute must be submitted when applying for the clan
• Attributes may not provide rank boosts


xxxxxWEAKNESSES
• The Water Element is strong against their fire.
• Using fire alone gives them limited specialty


xxxxxSTRENGTHS
• Incredibly powerful fire users [+1 rank to fire]
• Has a small, separate reserve of chakra used specifically for Fire Release. Listed in passives.
• Clan members' fire is strong enough to devour fire of the same rank and lower without weakening.


xxxxxPASSIVE ABILITIES
• Fire Manipulation
--- Clan members can create and manipulate fire to an extent of their rank. The fire moves at the same base speed of the user, and can be enhanced further with the single attribute they're allowed to give to their fire.

• Flame Attribute
--- Every clan member can give their flames one special attribute. While this ability is left up to creativity to decide, it is also influenced heavily by this magical thing called logic. Can your fire melt diamonds at E-rank? No. Can you blow up a village with one E-rank jutsu? No. Something like hotter fire than usual requires rank details. For example: Bob's fire is hot enough to burn techniques of one rank higher than his attack's rank, weakening them by two ranks instead of one.

• Flame Chakra
---Clan members gain an additional chakra pool made for using only fire style techniques. It starts off as [15] at Genin rank, and increases by [15] per rank afterward. For example, a Jounin would have [45] extra chakra to use for Katon only.


xxxxxTECHNIQUES


• Pure Flame Sphere Chuunin
A sphere of raw, powerful fire--of whichever color the user's flames are--erupts from the user's body, shielding them for a total radius of 15 feet. The shield is capable of deflecting one attack of Jounin-rank or higher before dissipating. Water of the same rank will destroy the shield.

• Pure Combustion Spheres Jounin
An upgraded version of the Combustion Sphere technique. The user now summons three combustion spheres of Chuunin-rank power, which explode with slightly more power than the single variant of the Chuunin-rank skill.

• Pure Hydra S - SS
The user launches five [or ten] flame hydras, each with Jounin[S-rank] power. With the enhanced technique, the hydras now explode with damage relevant to their rank. After the heads are in the air, the user can freely manipulate their trajectory. The user can also split the heads in two, reducing each head's power by one rank if they split into two.


xxxxxADDITIONAL COMMENTS
Again, Flame Attributes are not meant to be game-changingly OP. They're subtle changes made to tailor the user's fire to their character. They are only used for the flames, and cannot be applied to any other aspect of the character unless it involves their fire.

xxxxxRESTRICTIONS
• Cannot host the Sanbi, or the Kyuubi.
• May not use Curse Marks



xxxxxMEMBERS
Head: HEAD HERE
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[ Created by: Muffin ]

 

[Pandora Green]

Shane-senpai

Holy Rinaku

Seems good, but there's one big issue:

It seems to still be fitted to LR. Like, one of the skills costs 500 chakra. And there's .5 and -.5 increases/decreases, which doesn't exist in NUR.

Change that up a bit and it should be good to go, though I'll give it one more review before approving it.

Edits have been made, using maths!  

[The Wild Hunt]

Holy Rinaku

Approved.

Before putting it on the list however I'll try to reformat it.  

[The Wild Hunt]

-EM- Epic Muffin

I feel like this clan is kind of gamey.

1. Both of the weaknesses are a sham. It doesn't say you can only have fire, it just says you can only have it as your main element.

And water being strong against fire isn't special of this clan, it applies to fire in general. It doesn't imply a special or extended weakness to water.

2. Devouring fire of the same rank or lower without weakening seems kind of unfair to me. It seems like any other fire user, even if they heavily specialize in it but simply aren't a part of this clan, will get absolutely tossed by the Kurashi Kaen without any ability to resist.

3. Pure Flame Sphere. Deflecting one attack of Jounin-rank or higher? Wut?

And water of only the same rank will destroy the shield? What about that water weakness? Water of one rank lower should be able to destroy it. That's how it goes.

4. More chakra efficiency when you already have a lot more with the +1 rank to fire. You gain 30 CP worth for only 20; with a 2 rank boost you're basically spending 20 CP to get 90 CP worth. With a 1 rank boost you're spending 20 to get 60 CP worth.

This ability is a little unfair in my opinion.

5. Pure Hydra is the same as above, except even worse. A lot worse.

6. Most importantly: I don't want to see clans that exist solely for boosting purposes. You should add more techniques and give it more original flare (get it, flare? I'm so funny). Also, the picture is too big. Maybe try and incorporate anime or a gif into it or something instead?