Biohazard EXTREME's New Caption Contest

[Alkaizer87]

Neptune: Heeeeeeere's Neptune! With the new T-tuna by Umbrella. Make sure you eat tuna sandwiches with the contaminated flavor.  

[King of Paradise]

Damn Bio, I wanted to make a Shining reference...I still can, but I don't like to steal other people's thunder...So...

Neptune: Heeeeeeere's Neptune! ...You're probably wondering how I can talk...Well, the answer to that is rather simple. You see, there is a saying, well, more like a common phrase that states "Fish food is brain food". Well, me being a shark and all, you can imagine that I consume massive amounts of fish daily...Especially dolphins, which are supposed to be some the smartest creatures on the planet, though I don't necessarily think that's true. I was able to outsmart those narcissistic buttholes before I became super intelligent...Well, to get back on track, from consuming massive amounts of fish daily, I absorbed and distributed all that keen intellect. Normally, sharks don't become smart from consuming all these fish, but that's where the T-Virus comes into play. Although I don't understand the concept myself, apparently the T-virus I was infected with not only sped up the decaying process, but also quickened the distribution process. So, in a funny way, I was losing my mind as fast as I was expanding it. Though this should have kept me in a neutral state, I was able to adapt more cunningly. This included learning how to speak so that I could confuse and lure human human pray. Understanding the human language has some other benefits as well...I found that I'm rather good at impersonations, such as the Jack Nicholson from The Shining one I just did. Pretty good, no? Well, I'll let you go...TMZ is on, and I like to keep up with my celebrity news...Like, did you know that Kanye West came out of Davey Jone's closet and outed himself as a gay fish? Too bad...I would has so loved to tear that a** up...Sexually, that is...But now that I think about it, I'm going to go find him and eat his a**...How will I do that, you ask? Well, I also learned how to walk. The details behind learning how to do that are much more fascinating than as to how I became super smart....Woah! Look at the time! I'm sorry, but ever since I've learned how to talk, I've become a little of a chattermouth. Sorry, I'll let you go now. Bye!  

[Garcian Smith]

Shark: Fancy some sashimi?
(imagine a shrill British accent, like the "I didn't vote for 'im" lady in Monty Python.)  

[Canas Renvall]

@Garcian: Like Bio said, the idea is to start off with the caption I give you and expand on it. razz  

[zaploid]

Ok I think I'll give it a go.....

Neptune: Heeeeeeere's Neptune!
Chris (off screen): Oh, wow,now the shark is talking...Guess I shouldn't have mixed those green, red, and blue herbs together.....  

[King of Paradise]

Bumping to remind people to submit...DEAL WITH IT. scream ... lol  

[Canas Renvall]

Oh dear... I forgot about this... sweatdrop Well, I guess Sunday I'll choose the winner to let any last-minute submissions come in. razz C'mon, people, you can do eet!  

[Alkaizer87]

wiah...you forgot about this place? Did I try reminding you waay back. Oh well...  

[Canas Renvall]

Well, it's that time. razz

Third place: Zaploid
Second place: Biohazard EXTREME
First place: Chase Me To The End

Anyone who can put that much thought into a response and make it that funny deserves it.

You're up, Chase!  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Hey! I put a lot of thought into mine!  

[zaploid]

Wow...I actually got third! eek  

[taylortenacity]

well since theres no new caption up and i'm really bored

Neptune: Heeeeeere's Neptune!

Jill: Alright, so the shark is here, but how did that safety rail go through his head?  

[King of Paradise]

I don't have a photobucket account, nor do I plan to get one, so you guys are just gonna have to deal with the link. Sorry. Deal.

Also, to keep this thread in a fluid motion, I'm making the deadline for submissions to be in just two weeks.

Anyways, here you go:

http://fast1.onesite.com/capcom-unity.com/user/mikeeb13/resident_evil_2_art/93427b7bd1ffe7f7b70657e678da36bd.jpg

Leon: No no NO! That's not a cool pose at all, Claire!  

[Canas Renvall]

Leon: No no NO! That's not a cool pose at all, Claire!
Claire: Maybe not, but it proves mine is bigger than yours!
Leon: ...What?
Claire: The gun.
Leon: Oh... right... *sigh*  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Leon: No no NO! That's not a cool pose at all, Claire!
Claire: Why not? Chris does it. After suddenly increasing his muscles, he says that it's the only way he can feel like a real man.