Things Resident Evil characters would NEVER say

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Biohazard EXTREME

Jill: Hey, Wesker, where's Chris?
*runs out the door* *sounds of dogs roaring could be heard, then sound of Jill screaming as she gets torn apart by the cerberuses*
Wesker: *casually* That's a shame.

Ya know, I wonder what kept him from letting Jill go back out? He was supposed to kill them anyway...  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

He probably needed test data on the Hunters, and the Tyrant, and he figured, if everyone gets slaughtered by the Cerberus right away, then that'd be kinda impossible.  

[MadamTarantula]

Biohazard EXTREME

He probably needed test data on the Hunters, and the Tyrant, and he figured, if everyone gets slaughtered by the Cerberus right away, then that'd be kinda impossible.

He might've made a bet with William over how they would die. *smirk*  

[Celestial Fox Frenzi]

Wesker: I ain't leavin' without you b***h!
Alexia: o.o

*Total Eminem rip off*  

[Krav3n88]

*Jill see brad's brain blow out by Nemesis's Tentacle.*

Jill: "My, what thick strong tentacles your have. Mine if I try some of that?"
*She gets on her knees in front of Nemesis.*

And This was the begining of The Jill and Nemesis hentai lol  

[RoninFox]

*In Code Veronica, Chris finds that Wesker has grabbed Claire.*

Chris: Let her go, Wesker! You don't want her!
Wesker: Oh, actually, I do. *makes out with Claire*
Chris: eek scream  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

I bet Claire would like it, too.  

[Canas Renvall]

Of course she would. Claire's a bad girl. :XP:

Leon: Ashley, omg! Do you need help?!
Ashley: Actually, I'm quite capable, thanks. As a matter of fact, may I borrow your gun? *runs off and backflips, shoots, and kicks her way through a village of Ganados*  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

No, no...

Ashley: As a matter of fact, may I borrow your gun? *grabs the gun from Leon and shoots him down*

Now THAT would be something I'd want to see.  

[NotteRequiem]

Biohazard EXTREME

I bet Claire would like it, too.

I think I wouldn't mind seeing that.

Nemesis: S.T.A.R.S!!!!
(Translation: Does this Bazooka make my butt look big?)  

[Katrina Blackwater]

Alfred: Its all a lie! My grandfather was just the janitor at the first Umbrella Inc. headquarters! crying  

[RoninFox]

The Deranged Hatter

Alfred: Its all a lie! My grandfather was just the janitor at the first Umbrella Inc. headquarters! crying

That one made me LAWL!!! rofl I'm still laughing!!!

Barry: Blood! I hope this isn't Chris' blood! That son of a @#$%^ still owes me $50 from our last poker game!  

[Biohazard EXTREME]

Barry kneels down and dabs his fingers in the blood, he then proceeds to taste it.
Barry: Eewww!!!
Jill: What is it?
Barry: Blood! It's stale!  

[RoninFox]

*Wesker encounters Alexia in Code Veronica.*

Wesker: Alexia! ... Would you like to go to dinner and a movie with me?
Alexia: Hell yeah! blaugh  

[REaceofclubs]

Rodriguez[chief of village in RE4]: I AM CHIEF BIG NUTS! scream

(That's I call him. o_O)