The Restaurant at the End of the Universe RP

[Pashunath]

"I'm not sure earthman, but with you around something strange is sure to happen." Slartibartfast said to Arthur.  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

The Heretic 59548

Arthur pushed Ford off of him, turned to Slartibartfast, and said, "What do you think it means?"

Ford's head hit the floor with a thump, jolting him back into a state of semi-(concussed)conciousness. "I love scotch," he mumbled. "Scotchy scotch scotch." His eyes flickered open for a second, but failed to focus on anything, so they closed again for lack of anything better to do.
"Grasshoppers fly banana airplanes," Ford murmured, rolling over onto his side.
He then began to snore.  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

Ford rolled over in his sleep, snorted twice, and awoke with a start. He jerked up into a sitting position and looked around wildly. "Where is everyone?!"
Everyone was in exactly the same place they had been about five seconds ago, but Ford was terribly drunk and this sort of behavior was therefore excusable.
He narrowed his eyes at everyone in the room. "If nobody does anything in two weeks, I'm gonna... um... I'm gonna do... shometing." With that, Ford laid back down, closing his eyes to avoid looking at the ceiling and the mismatched socks all around him.  

[Fearless Trowa]

All Arthur could say was, "Oy."  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

"Which, by the way," cried Ford, springing up into a sitting position and pointing wildly in Arthur's vicinity, "is in fact a word that can be played in Scrabble! It's in the player's dictionary and everything!"
After a brief pause, he added, a bit more calmly, "And for some reason, Arthur, I also found that indescribably hot." With that he collapsed back upon the ground - whether he was unconcious again was anybody's guess.
Some people are honest drunks. Some people are quiet drunks. Ford Prefect was an odd drunk.  

[Yuuki Gunn]

Hey, sorry to interupt your RP and such, but (because you don't have one) could I claim the part of the guide? Unless I'm mistaken.  

[Angilwingz]

He's right. You need a guide.
How else will you receive random information?  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

OOCness: ninja How many of these people are still here is anyone''s guess, but I''ll keep going! I wanna! For god, country, and David Dixon*!
...also adding in another character, since Ford needs someone to interact with, and furthermore isn''t really in any condition to do anything coherent at the moment anyway. sweatdrop

Random stormed back from the bathroom. Once again, due to her age fluctuations, she was past puberty, and just in time for her period. Lovely. And her companions were faring little better: if she was pissy without her period, then she was damned if she was going to let a little thing like menstruation disturb her usual behavior patterns.
So, when she tripped over Ford, it was only natural that she kick him.
"Oh, Minako," moaned Ford as he rolled over slightly, "Quack."
Random rolled her eyes. "Great. He''s channeling penguins again."
Noticing an orphaned bottle of banapple schnapps on the floor, she bent over to retrieve it. She looked around for a place to drink without Arthur seeing, and finally sat on the floor next to Ford.
Not on Ford, of course. That wouldn''t be the right thing to do. Why, he might make a noise and alert Arthur to the fact that his daughter was drinking alcohol. Ooooohh. Whatever. As if she wasn''t old enough! ...well, at the moment, anyway.
Random opened the bottle and took a sip. Pretty good, actually.
Revived by the scent of alcohol, Ford stirred. He opened his eyes blearily, and for a brief, blurry moment, believed that a beautiful angel had come for him, bearing gifts of alcohol and no-strings-attached physical intimacy.
Fortunately he went for the booze first. Had it been otherwise, his injuries could potentially have been fatal.
Ford widened his eyes in terror when he recognized Random - not by her appearance, of course, but rather by the way she had hit him. Hastily he scooted himself to a more easily defensible position - beneath a table.
He almost wet himself when Random joined him under the table a few seconds later. Luckily, she seemed now to be in a much better mood.
"Ford, you''re a genius!" she laughed. "He definitely won''t see me under here. Come on, let''s get wasted." She passed Ford a bottle of Ol'' Janx Spirit, which he happily accepted. He''d sit under a table with the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal if it gave him alcohol.
"Hey Random," he said, swaying slightly.
"Yeah?"
"Your ssss...socksh don'' matsch."
"So?"
Ford had no answer for this.

OOCnessonward: Well? Anyone care to {re}join in? I''ll keep the beer warm for ya! ...or something!  

[Jupiter-X]

(OOC: ASSUMING of course the possibility of the return of the two players of zaphod, there would be no trouble in reenstating them BOTH as his separate heads. works for everyone, eh? wink

also, i think i'll take up the part of an innocent bystander, as I am a compulsive godmodder... sweatdrop )

Arthur (ooc: see?) glanced up from the Shy-Reel t'Mple he had been nursing long enough to see a waiter walk by. The waiter was carrying what looked to him to be a miniture telephone booth, a small, glass toaster filled with an orange syrup, and three oversized, furry clams. The waiter stepped purposefully over the comatose bodies of Trillian, Slartibartfast, Zaphod and the Earthling Alyssa. He then bent low down next to the table under which Ford and Random were hiding.
"Your Prarie Oysters, Sir and Madam." He said in a tired voice.
"I," said Ford, beginning to sober up at the scent of them,"did not order theese."
"Of course not, sir, a being from table 54 sent them to you and madam. He also requested that I give you this," he handed over a small metal object, "and that I tell you that he requests that you join him at his table immediatly."

Before Ford or Random could formulate a response, the waiter dumped the contents of his tray on their collective laps and dashed off suspisiously. ninja

(ooc: oh well. it doesn't really matter if I do godmod, since you and I are the only ones here. xp )  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

{ooc: biggrin heck, the plot's been made a mess of as it is. I can do a little godmodding of my own...}

With a look of serious disgust on her face, Random swept the various fuzzy and gooey foodstuffs away. She tucked the metal object into a pocket without giving it a second glance; it was about the right size and weight to throw at someone later.
Ford looked about quizzically for table 54. Actually, he didn't even know what table he was at. The bottom of the table offered no solution, but did list several phone numbers worth remembering.
"Shall we find table 54?" he said as he rose, offering an arm to Random. Maybe she knew where it was, anyway.
Random took his arm and yanked him back down. "We're in a completely different wing of the restaurant from table 54. There's no way anyone sitting there could know we're sitting here."
"But the waiter said-"
"Excuse me." Random gave Ford a withering glare. "Are you telling me you would rather be swept off on another madcap save-the-universe quest than sit under a table and drink yourself crosseyed?"
Ford considered this. "Well, it would be the third one tonight..."
"You see? If someone wants us so bad, they can come and get us." With that, Random primly took another sip of banapple schnapps.
"I like your thinking." Ford cheerily toasted Random, then proceeded to undo the damage the oysters had done to his blood alcohol level.  

[Jupiter-X]

Random began rummaging around franticly in her pocket. She was looking for a mint, as the banapple shnapps has caused her to develop an undesirable after taste. She happened upon that small metal object. It was about the size of a credit card, only two or three times as thick, and ten times as heavy. Upon further inspection, she saw that on the side was engraved "Another fine product of Sirius Cybernetics Corp. Share and Enjoy!"  

[Yuki-Onna Reed]

Jupiter-X

Random began rummaging around franticly in her pocket. She was looking for a mint, as the banapple shnapps has caused her to develop an undesirable after taste. Ford's breath was approaching the potency of the contents of a small liquor store combined and re-distilled.

( stare Undesirable aftertaste my left head! That's banapples you talkin' 'bout, fool! xp )


Ford managed to decipher the glyphs upon the metallic object in Random's hand (eventually). "Hm," he said.
"Heard of them?" Much of Random's life had been spent around technology that actually worked - thus she had no knowledge of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation, lucky girl.
"Well, they can't make tea, and they can't make robotsh..." Seeing Random's puzzled look, he clarified: "Marvin."
Random immediately flung the object across the room, where it landed in a space hippie's soup.
"A wise deshishun," slurred Ford slightly, "I'd've done it myself."
"I suppose it qualifies as sharing and enjoying," mused Random as she watched the space hippie, who was admiring the pretty reflections made in the metal. "Anyway, here," she said, handing Ford the aforementioned mint.
Ford popped the small, round, white mint into his mouth - and sobered up immediately. "Gee, tha- GGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! What the zark was that?!"
"Peppermint Altoid."
"It burns..." moaned Ford, eyes watering.
"Sissy," said Random smugly as she ate two mints.
Ford eyed her suspiciously. "Why are you feeding me mints, anyway?"
"Because your breath stinks. Why else?"
"And why is this your problem?"
Random stared at him a moment before she answered. "Well, I'm in an enclosed space with you-" she indicated the table above and the tablecloth draped around them "-and, I don't know, I'd like to continue to be able to breathe."
"Oh," said Ford. "So it's not..." he trailed off.
"What?" asked Random testily. She had very little patience left for stupid questions.
"Nothing." Apparently, Ford decided, he wasn't that sober.  

[Yuuki Gunn]

(Unless some one says otherwise, I will begin to Role Play as the Guide)

Being Sober is something that only some species in the galaxy can do, and only some of those want to. For Example the Great Sigs of Siinani will have always have an recently emptied bottle on hand and a hangover for they are one of the few creatures to delvope and immuntie to alchol poisoning, they spent many years on this and have been celebrating this as a hole for almost as long.