Welcome to Gaia! ::

omg Now I feel old...Thanks Estu. I thought she was still making 'music'! She was around when Jessica Simpson still sang Christian songs and Britney was innocent! xd

I love 'Pale' too!!! >_<

XD no worries ucchan she still does but its played more on spanish station and stuff like that then on regular radio stations

since more of her music had spanish instead of ingles

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25OPlWlKc-w

lol i like this one more

lol!
no ucchan I am spanish!!
hahaha no wonder you thought i sounded more texan
Its one of the reasons people dont understand so much of what i say when i talk

I pronouce my vowels like you do in spanish

You have no idea the torture your people put me through every night!!

Ucchan: "Hi may I speak to Jose Rodriguez?" (Everyone's named that I think. Very original, like a language that consists of two sylables)
Other line: "..."
Ucchan: "Hello...?" o_O
Old woman: "...Bueno?"
Ucchan: "May I speak to Jose Rodriguez please?"
Old woman: *speaking in Spanish* *Clamor*
Brat: "...Bueno?"
Ucchan: "Hi may I speak with-"
Brat: "Bueno?"
Ucchan: "Can you hear me?"
Brat: "Si..."
Ucchan: *sighs* "May I speak with Jose Rodriguez?"
Brat: "Who?"
Ucchan: "Jose. Rodriguez."
Brat: "Which one?"
Ucchan: *holding back a groan and a migrane* "The oldest one..."
Brat: "That's me. There's five of us here."
Ucchan: "I must have the wrong number. Thank you..."

and that's my better days!

@Estu: Pale is a songname.

To us it's only a barrel of laughs when the calls last only a few seconds. Not drag out for ten minutes before someone finally comes on the phone to say what I knew all along; that no one there speaks a word of English.

Here's some more worthy mentions. 100% authentic calls Ucchan had to deal with on only one day:

Starting out a normal day:

SC: Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with-
SC: NO YOU MAY NOT!
Click!

Thank you. Next:

SC: Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with ?
SC: This is her is there a message?
Me: o_O

What did she want me to say, "That's okay I'll call back when all your lights are on?" Anyways, next:

SC: Hi welcome to may I take your order?
Note: We're not supposed to be calling businesses on this program, so whenever we get a business we are supposed to exit the call.
Me: I'm sorry I must have the wrong number.
SC: You called .
Me: Yes, and I apologize for my call. Tha-
SC: You just called so make an order!
Th(thought): You must be kidding me -_-
Me: No that's fine, thank you.
SC: Whatever, stupid b***h.
Click!

Funny, I don't remember seeing that name anywhere in my birth certificate. Next:

SC: Hello?
Me: Hi may I-
Click!
Me: o_O

The usual classics. I get them about 50 times a day.

After about a half hour of this a supervisor tells me she wants me to go on another program. In this program all I'm doing is calling old cardmembers from a company and activating their new cards and reminding them to destroy their expired ones. Easy right? Wrong:

SC(Man with a very thick southern accent): Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with Amber ?
SC: ...
Me: ... Hello?
SC: Do I sooooound like an Aaaaamber to you?
Me: (Startled by the loudness of his voice) N-No sir. May I speak with her please?

That call began promising -_- Next:

SC(man): Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with Heather ?
SC: Okay sure. Hang on a second.
Th: It took me an hour and I finally get a sensible call...
SC: (Same guy, imitating a woman voice) Hi. This is Heather.
Me: -_- I'll call back another time...
SC: GOOD!
Click!

*sighs* Next:

SC(man): Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with ?
SC: Will... you give me... A BLOW JOOOOOOOB?!
Snap! That be my patience
Click! That be SC hanging up
Me: (looking at the address and seeing it's California) You gonna pay for my plane ticket buddy?

At that point I gave up and took a few minutes off. Starting a shift as a TSR is the hardest part of the day.

Puppet you might laugh at this one. I did after the call ended and the aftermath later xd

People:

Me: The victim
Th: What I'm thinking
Mon: The person monitoring the calls and listening in(making sure I'm doing my job)
G: Some innocent girl on the other line
SOB: The other girl that came on after the first one

So I get the call in(automatically thank God!)

Beep!(That be the call coming in)

Me: Hi may I speak with ?
G: Okay hang on *places phone down*
...
SOB: Hello?
Me: Hi may I speak with- *interupted*
SOB: I'M NOT GAY!
Me: ... *Shocked* What?
SOB: I'M NOT GAY!
Me: I didn't say you were, may I spea- *Interupted again*
SOB: ARE YOU GAY?!
Me: Um... no? *still shocked*
SOB: Good. I hate talking to those queers. Anyways, what were you saying?
Me: *regaining posture* Well, may I spea- *interupted again*
G: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!
SOB: Oh my God! Hang on a second! *puts phone down*
Me: *being safe, in case she was still there* Okay ma'am.
*screams stop*
SOB: I'm terribly sorry about that. That was my sister falling down the stairs
Th: You sure you didn't just push the for girl down the stairs? You seem like the type.
SOB: Anyways, what were you going to say, sorry about that.
Me: It's okay. May I speak with ?
SOB: That's me. What can I do for you?
Th: Getting back on due course...
Me: Hi this is Ukyo Kuonji calling on behalf of your .
SOB: Okay.
Th: Well, this could get back to normal.
Me: I'm calling today to wel- *interupted*
SOB: Oh my God! My boyfriend's pulling his d**k out! Hold on one second! *places phone down*
Me: ... *to stunned to speak*
SOB: Oh my! I'm back.
Th: Unfortunately...
Me: Okay. I'm calling today- *Interupted yet again*
SOB: Did you hear what I said?
Me: ... You mean a minute ago?
SOB: Yeah.
Me: ... *Thinking carefully about what to say next* Yes.
SOB: What did I say?
Th: You want me to repeat something like that in a business? No can do.
Me: ... Um... I'm not exactly capable of saying that here... *silence on the other line* It seems like you're busy, I'll call back another time...

Upon saying that I attempt to say what's called a TCPA which is pretty much giving the customer a toll free number in case there were questions. After two attempts and being interupted by sounds of her fondling the phone in a very sexual manner(that I never hope to hear on the phone again I must add), I put the sound as low as I can get it and I said the TCPA over her(Three strike rule baby!). When I finished I rolled up the volume again, to see if she's still there. Unfortunately she was, and still having her fun with the phone. At that point I hung up on her.
A few minutes later a monitor came down and sat next to me with a paper in her hand...

Mon: Take your next call and hang up.
Th: Oh great what did I do wrong?
Me: Okay.
*takes next call, sweating bullets the whole time*
Me: Okay, what did I do wrong?
Mon: Wrong? Nothing. I just wanted to show you how you did.
Th: Sitting next to me and you're saying that? Why don't I believe you?
Me: Well you normally don't sit down like this unless... you know.
Mon: Yup. And here's what I'm here for.
*She passes me the paper*
Me: *Reading report* Oh no...
Th: You HAD to get me on that call! HAD to!
Mon: I wanted to congratulate you. You did a good job.
Me: I DID? o_O
Mon: Yup. That's all. Good night. And since you are our best performer tonight you won $20. *She leaves after getting my signature on the paper and giving me $20 bill*
Me: *Sat down with the headphones in one hand, $20 bill in the other* ... o_O;