[FIN] Precautions

[BlackFireKitsune]

Usually the large box remained in its place on the floor of his closet always, but for the demonstration it'd be much simpler, much easier to have it out in the open... which required a bit of dragging due to its weight and size. Not that it was difficult for them, of course.

Abel's rather distracted manner continued through the beginning of Zevran's explanation, but the Spanish caught his attention and he blinked a few times as he looked over at his love. "Ah, sorry, I was just.. thinking about something," he said sheepishly, then pressed a kiss to his boyfriend's temple before he sank down to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of the box. "So," he went on, looking keenly at his boyfriend and endeavoring to remember what he'd just said - he had to pay attention, he had to, and not even just because he'd requested to be taught - and grasped at least one word he remembered, "you were saying -- about pins?"  

[TawnyAngel]

"Something?" Zevran prompted gently as he started to sketch out the shape of a padlock on the notepad. Was Abel thinking about the Crows again? He was trying not to do so himself.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"Something else," he elaborated and then shrugged, as if to dismiss it with the gesture. Then to verbally dismiss it he added, "It's nothing really." Padlock sketches were much more interesting than his own personal worries and insecurities though, so he eagerly leaned over to peer at Zevran's drawing.  

[TawnyAngel]

What was the right thing to do in this situation? Should he press Abel to tell him what was the matter or should he let it go? Zevran's brow creased slightly and studied Abel's face intently as he turned that question over in his mind but this brought him no closer to an answer. He looked down at the page again and continued sketching, now drawing in the mechanism with neat strokes of the pen. "I don't know whether or not I ought to keep pressing you on this something or to let it go," he admitted with slightly awkward honesty as he worked, he felt that he ought to know or at least that other people would know but he simply did not. "I suppose all I can say is... well however small a thing it is if you wanted to tell me I would listen. You told me once that talking helps?" Perhaps it really was nothing and he was just looking for more than was there because of the worry gnawing away at his own gut.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

As Abel slowly traced the sketchy lines of Zevran's work with his colorful eyes, his previous worries slowly slipped away.

Until Zev's words brought them back to the forefront of his mind again. The taller blond's gaze flicked up to his boyfriend's face for a few moments, but he was still focusing on his sketch and so didn't meet his eyes. It was probably for the best at the moment, really. Abel hummed thoughtfully, then slipped an arm around his love and pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder, doing his best not to disturb him and mess up his work. "I did tell you that before, didn't I? Well, I... was just thinking about.. my own past I guess," he admitted after a moment or two, struggling a bit to get the words out. To anyone else he'd never admit such a thing because that would hint there was much more there than he let on -- but Zevran already knew that. He already knew bits and pieces of it but he had never really talked about it before, even though Zev had shared a lot of his past. How was that fair?

Abel licked his suddenly dry lips and leaned his cheek on his boyfriend's shoulder instead, still gazing down at the sketch in his hands. "You've shared a lot of things with me that were awful, or difficult - or both - and I.. haven't really. I know I've told you a few things but not nearly as much, and I.. I want to, but I'm just... ah..... worried, I guess," he admitted finally, his voice quieting over the last few words. Why was it so difficult to admit he was worried?  

[TawnyAngel]

Zevran completed the sketch slowly while Abel spoke, and when his friend-and-boyfriend fell silent he waited a moment or two in case there was more to come. When Abel didn't add any more he reached for the heavy padlock, snicked it closed, and then reached for his pouch of tools. "¿Worried about what I will think?" he asked softly, his accent thickening as his mind wandered back to the past, to those parts of it that he had related to Abel; awful indeed, and beyond awful.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"Well..." Abel fell silent again as he watched Zevran click the heavy lock shut and fetch his set of picks. "...well yes, I-- yes. I've never told anyone else before, never so much as breathed a single word of it before, not until what's-her-face showed up and even then I still tried my damnedest not to let anyone find out anything, or at least as little as possible. I just.. I always assumed I would take it to my grave, that I'd never talk to anyone about it, because why would I?" He straightened back up and shrugged a little, his gaze shifting down to his fidgeting anxiously in his lap. "Now, though, it's.. different. I want to share because you've shared so much with me, but I'm just.. yes, I'm worried."  

[TawnyAngel]

He listened quietly and fetched the clever picks out one by one. They looked strange laid in a row atop the soft covers of Abel's bed, out of context.

"I love you," Zevran said quietly, stroking his fingertips along the most used of the dull-coloured little tools as he spoke. "I am your man, without question or need for explanation. You are... you are secretive, I have always known this and I will respect it if you prefer to keep those secrets but I would like to know if you are willing to tell. If you choose to tell me I swear I will not judge you; void take my tarnished soul if I speak a lie. After all you have done for, after all you have accepted in me how could I do less?"  

[BlackFireKitsune]

His colorful eyes drifted over to the set of picks laid out in a neat row, and despite the anxiety gnawing away at him he couldn't help the soft smile that curved his lips at his boyfriend's words. "I love you too, I.. I know." He licked his lips and went on, hands still fidgeting a bit, "I've always been secretive but I.. I think I'd like to share them, I'm just... worried. I can't help it," the taller blond said with a frustrated sigh. Zevran loved him, wouldn't judge him and he believed him - he did - so why was he so worried?

No, nevermind, he knew why.

"Sometime," he went on after a moment or two, the brief show of frustration gone just as quickly as it had flared up, "I'll talk about it.. sometime. Not yet."  

[TawnyAngel]

Not yet?

Zevran looked up at last and searched Abel's expression carefully with soft warm eyes. "Sometime," he agreed, "when you are ready to talk, I am ready to listen." It didn't have to be now, they had all the time in the world. If he lived. He had to live. Abel needed him to live.

"Now as I was saying, these pins..."  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Abel relaxed a bit, enough to offer his love a small, furtive smile. "Thanks."

He listened closely to Zevran's explanations, watched his demonstrations with interest and did his best to remember what he could. It seemed like very delicate, fiddly work -- and it was, he knew, when he switched spots with his boyfriend and tried to pick the lock himself. It was.. a lot more difficult than he'd anticipated, and he frowned thoughtfully as he tried to carefully unlock it without accidentally breaking any of Zevran's tools. "This is more difficult than I thought it'd be," he admitted in thoughtful, somewhat distracted tones. "I mean not that I thought it'd be easy or anything, but definitely more difficult than I thought." Not that he wanted to give up or anything, of course. Not a chance.  

[TawnyAngel]

"Mmmh." Zevran had shifted to sit behind Abel and now gave him a companionable squeeze with both arms and thighs. "Really this is not the place to start even with my assistance. There are clear plastic locks you can buy so you can see what the picks are doing, that is where I began. If you like though I could guide your hands? Not quite the same as doing it yourself but I would not expect such from a first try and..." Zevran paused briefly as he groped for the right phrasing before continuing with; "And so even guided it is good practice, if you will close your eyes and focus you will feel the shift of the pins."  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"I like these kinds of hugs," he said with a smirky sort of smile shot over his shoulder at his boyfriend, then turned to focus back on the lock again. "Mm, those definitely sound really useful for learning... I s'pose I could always go try and find one or two sometime to practice with, maybe." But at the moment the locks before them were the only ones he had to practice on, so they'd have to do... though Zevran's suggestion sounded nice. "That sounds like a good idea," he said as his colorful eyes slid shut. "Guiding my hands, I mean. I like it when you do that anyway, of course," he added with another smirk.  

[TawnyAngel]

Ah, why was he so endearing?

Zevran huffed fond amusement and kissed the curve where Abel's neck joined his shoulder. "I very much enjoy doing so! Your hands are lovely when put to a proper task, but this will be even more finely detailed than usual. Are you prepared? Just hold the pick there loosely and relax for me."  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Abel chuckled a bit, his expression somewhere between a smile and a grin. "I kind of figured. Or at least, you've never complained. But yeah, I'm ready," he agreed with a nod, closing his eyes again and doing his best to relax to allow Zevran to guide his hands easier.