[Fin] Home for Christmas

[BlackFireKitsune]

Unbeknownst to him, Abel had the same idea as his friend; he scooted a bit to a more comfortable position, settling down for as long a conversation as Zevran wanted to have. Hay crinkled beneath him as he shifted. "Yeahh, that's so true. Texts and pictures are nice, but they don't really convey tone or anything, and plus sometimes it's good to just talk, or listen." Especially when it was someone he cared for, when it was one of his best friends. That was all it was, obviously.

Except it wasn't.

"Is something wrong?" No, everything was probably just fine; Zevran would've contacted him immediately and told him if anything had happened, or if anything was seriously wrong... So everything was probably okay. Maybe something was on his mind, keeping him up, or maybe he was just restless for some inexplicable reason like he himself was? "Is anything bothering you and keeping you from falling asleep?"  

[TawnyAngel]

Zevran nodded against the pillow, a small soft smile still playing on his lips. "You have the right of the right of that, there is much that cannot be said in text no matter how many emotioncons you use." He also found it a little more difficult than speaking, his written English was good and autocorrelation usually helped but it never felt quite natural...

And he just liked hearing Abel's voice.

"Also no, nothing is wrong," Zevran replied, and it was true wasn't it? He was not ill, injured, or anything so unpleasnt; it was just that, "My mind simply does not wish to go to sleep tonight it seems. Yourself?" There was a tinge of concern in Zevran's voice as he asked after Abel in turn, had he asked because he was troubled himself?  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"Exactly! Like flirting, it's so much better talking on the phone than just texting. Of course in person is the best, but..." He trailed off with an internal shrug. In person wasn't an option just at the moment, as much as he wanted it to be - which was much more than he really should - so he'd have to settle for a phone call. At least he could hear Zevran's voice.

Even though he figured nothing was seriously wrong, he still felt relieved to have it verified. His smile renewed and he relaxed a bit more, already feeling more comfortable than he had for the past few hours. "That's good. That nothing's wrong, I mean," he added quickly. "And I think my mind's just the same as yours. I don't know why I can't sleep. But I can't really complain, because it meant I could talk to you for a while instead." And oh how badly he'd wanted to talk to Zev, how he'd wanted to hear his voice... He wanted to do more than just that of course, but again, that wasn't really possible so far away.

He remained quiet for a moment or two, marveling at the fact that even the silence was comforting -- perhaps because he knew Zevran was on the other end of it. Just his presence was comforting, even if neither of them spoke. But then he promptly broke the silence to ask, "So what'd you do today?"  

[TawnyAngel]

"Ah yes, flirting by text does tend to be a little unsubtle." Zevran chuckled and huffed slightly as he shifted position before adding; "Not that I mind a little crudeness but that too is better done orally don't you think?" He had missed this, missed Abel terribly and it had only been a few days. What was wrong with him? "I am glad that you are the same." Had that sounded to sincere, not light hearted enough?... It probably didn't matter, especially if he continued right away.

"Ahh, we have had quite a busy day today as it happens. In the morning I took some of my pokemon training, we won a couple of battles and lost a couple but I came out ahead in cash by - oh - five dollars?" Zevran laughed briefly at the absurdity of it, all of that effort for so little reward! It had been good for the pokemon though and that was the point of it really. "Ah, and Vision mastered a new move but I have forgotten what it is called, I will have to look it up. In the afternoon I attempted to make some of your mother's Mago berry jam but alas it has not set. I have poured it into jars in any case, it will be a pleasant... ah..." Zevran mumbled a mild curse in Spanish, "I have forgotten that word again; sweet gravy? For things like oatmeal and pancakes. What have you done today?"  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Abel couldn't help but chuckle. Ohh, how he'd missed flirting and exchanging witty banter with him... He'd missed that, he missed hearing his voice, he missed seeing his face, seeing him, holding him, hanging out and having fun with him -- he missed him. s**t, there was no way out of this, was there? Did he even want there to be one? No, not really. Besides, crushes didn't always amount to much of anything - if anything at all - so he set the matter aside to contemplate some other time when he wasn't quite so tired and restless late at night. That was the worst time to think about things, anyway. "Either too subtle or crude, yes; and I agree completely. It is much better when performed orally. Especially in private places, although it is fun to do it in public places sometimes too. It can be a fun challenge." A poignant pause. "Flirting, I mean." Of course.

It was nice listening to Zevran talk about his day. Actually it was nice just listening to Zevran talk. He had such a nice voice. It was pleasant to listen to, and attractive -- just like the rest of him. While he still didn't understand any Spanish, Abel always enjoyed hearing his friend speak it regardless. He didn't have to understand it to appreciate it. "That sounds like a productive day," he said with a chuckle, his eyes sliding shut as he quietly enjoyed the sound of his friend's laughter, however brief. "Training's always good, whether you make money off of it or not. You can't really buy experience." Hmm, what move had Vision learned? He was curious to know, but as Zev said, later. "Oh, did you? I'll have to let her know - or you can tell her yourself actually - either way she'll be pleased to hear it. She mentioned wanting to try one of your recipes tomorrow, but she won't tell me which one it is," he went on somewhat ruefully. He was so curious to know, but no; 'it's a surprise' she'd said. Bah. Oh well, he'd find out tomorrow.

The foreign curse brought an amused smile to his lips, but rather than chuckle at it, he hummed thoughtfully instead. "Sauce? I think that's what you're thinking of, and either way it'll taste just as good. And we haven't done a whole lot today, mostly just spending time with everyone. Taavi's always outside with all the pokemon or helping in the barn any chance he gets; he's pretty much in heaven here." Fond amusement tinged his tones as he went on, "Dad's already asked Mom if they can keep him; he loves having him around to help out with stuff. I think tomorrow or the day after Taavi and I might head down to Lake Valor or something, or go check out the ruins outside of town. I've gone plenty of times since I was a kid, but he's never been and I figured he'd enjoy both. If I can tear him away from all the pokemon here on the ranch first, of course," he added with another chuckle.  

[TawnyAngel]

"Sauce!" Zevran laughed and then groaned. "The simple ones get away sometimes. Yes though, I shall email your mother tomorrow to see if she knows what might have happened and to ask how her own cooking turned out; I know what she is making!" There was a teasing lilt to Zevran's voice as he announced this last fact, and he quickly followed up with; "But I shall never tell! And I am too far away for you to tickle it out of me, or to persuade me by other means."

It really sounded as though they were having a wonderful time, hearing that in Abel's voice warmed his heart yet at the same time it made his stomach twist. He wished he was there too. "It sounds as though you may have trouble persuading him to come back again," Zevran chuckled. "What is this lake valour you speak of?"  

[BlackFireKitsune]

His smile widened as he chuckled again, thoroughly enjoying the tone Zev took. "Aww, come on! You won't even give me a hint or anything? Man... I'll just have to tickle you when I get back then." It was good that Zevran was emailing his mother though; she seemed to be enjoying their exchanges a great deal. Plus he was excited to have her take on one of Zev's recipes tomorrow. Not because he missed him or his cooking or anything, of course.

"I might," he went on with another chuckle, settling more comfortably in the hay and trying to ignore the bits that poked into the back of his head and neck. "I might have to drag him by the leg out of the barn. He won't have to drag me out though. Ah, Lake Valor is one of the three lakes in Sinnoh that's said to have a legendary pokemon inside that's a guardian of the surrounding areas. Lake Valor is the closest one to the ranch, and the legendary that watches over the area is called Azelf."  

[TawnyAngel]

Ahh, Legendary pokemon, yes Taavi would be very keen to go there! The ranger still sometimes seemed to get lost in just staring at the Articuno which in turn seemed quite happy at the attention, vain thing; he himself would not know anything about enjoying being stared at of course.

"That sounds like a trip he will enjoy very much, on top of how much he is already enjoying himself," Zevran agreed with fond amusement. "I am surprised that you shall not need to be dragged back here though, I have half been expecting to hear that you plan to spend another week there with your family." It had been so long since he had seen them and they meant so very much to him, surely he wanted to remain?  

[BlackFireKitsune]

"Right? I thought so too." It was soothing, listening to Zevran's voice and knowing he was on the other end. His presence, however far, was comforting. "I figured he'd love to go check it out -- and Valour too. And nah, I couldn't spend another week here. I mean I'd love to, of course, but I have to get back to work, I can't just stay here forever, as much as Mom wants me to. Plus I miss you too much as it is."

...he just said that out loud.

He just said that out loud.

The warm, fuzzy feeling that covered him like a blanket, guiding him towards sleep, vanished abruptly as soon as the words left his lips. He hadn't meant to say that out loud... s**t.  

[TawnyAngel]

...He missed him? Truly? His absence was so important? He had noticed that Abel had been sending longer messages than he usually did but he had thought, ¿what, that Abel was simply indulging him perhaps? But he really missed him.

In the silence that followed it felt as though the world were holding its breath; he could play the comment off lightly or he could say what he really thought, felt. Would that really be so terrible? His mind and instincts resisted the idea and yet-

"I... I miss you too Abel." Zevran managed after several tense moments and though his words came out haltingly his sincerity was clear. He missed Abel. Abel missed him. That was... Was that good?  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Why did he feel so cold all of a sudden when he'd felt so warm and comfortable up until a moment ago? Why had he started saying what came to his mind first without thinking about it before saying it? Why had he said that?

Because it was true.

But he hadn't meant to say it; it had slipped out before he'd even realized what he was saying, and now he didn't know what to do, what to say. Should he apologize? Should he try to redact it? But why should he? Maybe he should--

Zevran broke the long silence first, voicing a simple phrase with that uncertain sincerity of his; it made his heart flutter and stole his breath at the same time. Zev missed him too. Abel licked his suddenly dry lips as he tried to think of what to say. "I... I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable, it just... slipped out. I meant it of course, I do miss you," he added hastily lest Zev think otherwise, though his usual casual, easy tones were absent, instead replaced by uncertainty. "I didn't mean to say it out loud -- I didn't think I should, I..." And there he trailed off before his uncertainty grew too much, instead silencing himself to try and think.  

[TawnyAngel]

"No! No, I was not uncomfortable," Zevran replied quickly. It wasn't that at all but articulating what it was was not easy. "I was just... surprised," he began slowly, curling himself around Abel's pillow a little as he tried to think his way through a response. This would be a lot easier if he knew what actually had been going through his mind or what was now in fact, a lot of it didn't seem to agree or make sense. "I am... glad? Not that you miss me. Though I am glad that you miss me. Ahh... I am not explaining myself well. Do you understand though?" Could he feel both ways at once? It seemed silly to him but humans were full of contradictions so perhaps it was not as strange as he thought.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

Ah, good, it hadn't made him uncomfortable. So he... didn't mind it, he missed him too -- and it sounded like he felt the same conflicting things he himself was. Even with how uncertain he felt, how much his stomach churned and his heart fluttered in his chest, he couldn't help the quirk of his lips as he asked in slightly teasing tones, "So you're glad but you're not glad?" Setting that aside, how should he phrase a response... "I think I understand, yeah. I think I understand really well actually, because I think I feel the same. It's like... I feel bad that you miss me - I don't want you to feel anything bad because of me - but it's... it's nice to be missed." Of course his family always missed him, and he them, but this was different. Very different. "Is that how you're feeling?"  

[TawnyAngel]

Abel was capturing his feelings very well tonight, very well indeed. Zevran found himself smiling as he rolled onto his back; he felt light and airy but somehow nervous too, his gut twisted and fluttered and yet he was still smiling. "Yes, that is exactly how I feel," he agreed. After a moment of silence he added; "I did not expect to miss you this much." He had expected to miss his company and all of the wonderfully fun things they did together but not like this, it felt as though... He wasn't even entirely sure but he didn't like the feeling, a yawning yearning sensation that he was unfamiliar with.  

[BlackFireKitsune]

A smile curved his lips when Zevran responded, softened his expression and caused a feeling of warmth to bloom in his heart. Zev felt the same. He shouldn't want him to, shouldn't be so glad to hear that he did, and yet he wanted him to and was so, so glad that he did. It was such a strange feeling; his mind and heart had never disagreed so strongly before, and he wasn't sure what to really do about it. No, he knew what he should do, but he couldn't convince himself. He couldn't even come close to considering convincing himself. "I... I didn't expect to miss you this much either," Abel admitted after a moment or two, hugging his free arm around his midsection. "I wish I brought you too; I'm sorry I didn't. I didn't want to impose on my parents too much at first, and then when I really wanted to impose anyway it was too late, it would've been too selfish to ask then. Next year," he said in a more decisive tone, "you can come next year." After a pause he added quickly, more hesitantly than before, "If you want to, that is."