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Posted: Sat Feb 02, 2008 9:50 pm
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Posted: Sun Feb 03, 2008 7:04 pm
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Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 2:53 pm
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Posted: Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:52 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 1:57 pm
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Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 3:05 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 9:39 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 10:40 pm
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Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2008 1:23 pm
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I have this one guy in my group who constantly plays ridiculously. Typically he either ends up raped, with his genitals cut off, deemed retarded, etc. I usually allow it since I like the levity in my serious DMing style.
Here's an example: His character had walked into a farmer's house which had invited him and another character, a female's who's race allowed them to shapeshift into a bear at will, to stay for dinner. So he walks in, and his first instinct is to have sex with the farmer's wife. Then the kids. He was only kidding, but I was kind of getting tired of the humour, so the next time he said something about having sex with the female character I took that as an action. So she turned into a bear and killed him.
Not quite a quote, but I found it funny, although it was kind of sad since that was just at the beginning of the adventure.
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Posted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 1:40 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 3:55 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 6:52 pm
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 3:19 pm
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We have doozies from ours. The permanent cast, so you're not confused as to who is what, is as follows.
A former hobgoblin, now dragonborn, cleric of Lathander and Tamara A half-silver dragon kobold vassal of Bahamut A warforged drunken master, who has a portable hole installed in his chest cavity. He is our Bender. A lesbian whisper gnome rogue, who has a penchant for sun-elves. A former halfling, now bugbear, rogue, clearly Chaotic Stupid.
Dragonborn: "This is the point where the DM starts hitting the hard liquor and starts statting out Ninja Nazi Chickens." Kobold: "Farspawn Ninja Nazi Chickens."
Bender: "Yay! Splatter-happy fun time!"
Gnome: "Oh, you're Smokey the Bugbear!"
Kobold: "The best way to run away from a displacer beast is to run right where you last saw it."
DM: "No fewer than seven chests of different sizes." Kobold: "I call the double Ds!"
Gnome: "If you can't hit the broad side of a barn, you're screwed." Bender: "Or a Stormtrooper."
(The Bender looks at the Gnome's player's shirt, a glow-in-the-dark skeleton shirt from Halloween.) Bender: "You're wearing a a skeleton shirt...it doesn't get more pornographic than that."
Bender: How does true-seeing work with beer goggles?
DM: You'll have to teach them common, they only know Draconic. Kobold: There's nothing wrong with Draconic, it's the language of the Dracons...
(The party is in a forest, with trees oozing some nasty-looking sap. The Bender wants to ferment it to make an alcoholic beverage.) Bender: It's black and oozing already! DM: It's more Guinness than Guinness?
DM: What's the Konami code for Warforged sex?
Gnome: Hey [dragonborn], I need to be bonked! Dragonborn: How much do you need so I know when to stop? (in reply to needing to be whacked with a wand of cure light)
Elemental Savant: And let the power of Cthulhu console me! Gnome: Dude, Cthulhu won't console you. He'd eat you instead.
Bugbear, on starting his new religion: "I can write some salvation IOUs..."
Our game is obviously a bit towards the mature end of things, but it's pretty bad. And, with a revolving door of PCs, things can get quite interesting.
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