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Whoever said "Life Sucks" was an a*****e.
Life doesn't "suck", nor does it "blow", or any of those other ******** cute things professional cynics like to say.
Life just "is".
Life just is what it "is", and nothing else, and no amount of bitching will make it any different.
However, despite this train of thought, Jason Leventhal couldn't figure why it never seemed to work out for him. Yes, he had good days to counter his bad days, and yes, he had a wife, two sons, and a well-paying job; all of these things didn't make things any better when it came to how he felt on the inside.
"Mr. Leventhal, there's a Mr. Alehandro here to see you."
"Send him in Sheila."
Mr. Alehandro was one of the weasly looking men who, if rubbed the wrong way, would unhinge their jaws and attempt to consume whatever was offending them.
It seemed that Jason had rubbed him so far the wrong way that he had, in fact, inadvertantly managed to rub him the right way*.
"Mr. Leventhal, what a pleasure it is to finally meet you."
Jason stared numbly at the man standing in front of his desk.
"How uh... How can I help you?"
Mr. Alehandro smiled** and pulled a chair up, his knees cracking as he sat down. "Let's discuss things."
"What type of things?"
"Things involving what will happen to your youngest son if I walk out of this office unhappy."
*Assuming you follow the theory of the curvature of the universe, imagine a coward running so far way from a conflict that at the end of it all he's managed to gallop bravely from the direction of the battle, hailed as hero and rather confused as to just how he managed to put that sword in the heart of the very same dragon he'd been trying to avoid all day.
**Like a shark, if a shark was missing most of his teeth and smelled a bit like the hindside of a sick walrus***.
***There's a story about the origins of the walrus, not your typical evolution story, but instead a bit more interesting, involving angry Gods, and an unpleasant but very romantic romp between a seal and a lion.
More to come later, I will miss Terry Pratchett when he dies.
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