For The Boy Preparing to Escape.

[Tak-Jak]

If I could penetrate your sufferings
and prevent the threat of the clock,
I could stop those electric paintings
from gushing through your labyrinth.

This is not a heroine fatigue,
but rather it is me saying:

It is not my task to dissolve your costume;
you must invent your own mandala.
Your current interior reminds me of an ant
unaware of the shoe looming above him.
The mirror proportions you weigh your tasks by
is not a true reflection of the spark I see
hidden just under that rust. And the patterns
of today are sewn with a thread so frail
it diminishes underneath the sun's rays.

It is up to you to peel back the layers,
find that little boy that could never stand tall
at the sight of his Father's shadow.
Wrapped up in the hues of your tragic solitude,
you cannot see the Achilles within.
And that heel is moments away
from the tip of Memory's arrow.  

[KirbyVictorious]

That was amazing. I loved it.

Can I ask, who are these written about/for? They all seem to be about the sam e person.  

[Serenity Reed]

Wow. If someone gets the award for best way to say crap, it's you!
rofl  

[Tak-Jak]

It is truely an art form isnt it? xd

And who it is for, does not matter.
Because knowing does not influence the words.  

[Serenity Reed]

Wow. We really should make that award.  

[BlackHawkGS]

And the patterns
of today are sewn with a thread so frail
it diminishes underneath the sun's rays.

I really really liked that line. I adored that line. If I ever actually get around to my Wingless novel, I just may have to steal it, since it seems to fit a certain situation perfectly...

Overall, good stuff. This sounds like something I tried to write awhile ago. I think you and Kirby are invading my brain eek  

[Tak-Jak]

Can I invade other things too?
Oh that was bad! Bad Remy.

xd

Anyways, you are more then welcome to that line.
Just because I love the Wingless series.  

[KirbyVictorious]

Oh sure, NICK gets a straight answer. crying

Meanie.  

[Tak-Jak]

He gets a straight answer, because I am straight.

The only person I curve for is skittles. wink  

[Xahmen]

I have no idea what anything you wrote in this piece meant. That said, it sounded pretty. Why do you use Greek mythology so much? STUDY NORSE ALREADY!  

[Tak-Jak]

Thanks Damien.

I'll look into it.  

[KirbyVictorious]

No fair, that is discriminatory. gonk so only straight guys get straight answers? Laaaame.  

[blu_sour_skittle]

I like her greek mythology references. . . mostly because I get them

it diminishes underneath the sun's rays.
I think it would sound better as "beneath" rather than "underneath" but that's just my opinion. Underneath seems like it has too many syllables for that line. . . but whatev.

cool I'm already curved for you, hon.

 

[Tak-Jak]

Hmmm, I think you may be right Skittles.
I will think on it. Maybe change my draft.