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Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 9:11 pm
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Posted: Wed May 11, 2005 9:41 pm
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Eambar Imperial Gardens:: Approaching Numenor Lindon
Faithful Steward's marvelous, if not also uncomfortable flourish shocked the Dark Lord of the Sith, who had been interested only in a peaceful waltz through the submarine's beautiful Imperial Gardens, with its shrubberies and chipmunks and foxes and trees and ferns and oxen and sloths and breakfast cereals and statues of Lust and...
Nonetheless, Lord Vader listened intently to Faithful Steward's story, as all good lord's unwillingly do. And when the tale of lollipops and gumdrops was finished, the Lord Vader composed himself and offered his most sage advice. "Faithful Steward," said the armored Lord, "that made no sense at all. And there is not a bug in your teeth.
"Five, actually. I will have to spray the Imperial Gardens with pesticides, I see...
"But it matters not. Ill-tidings have reached me. But that must wait, for at the moment I must know! Yes, know this I must: Why the Udun were you using my prized three-tiered shrubbery, with its beautiful path down the middle, as a bed?"
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Posted: Sun May 15, 2005 1:59 pm
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Posted: Sun May 15, 2005 2:34 pm
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Eambar Imperial Gardens:: Approaching Lindon
"I am glad you asked, Faithful Steward!" said the Lord Vader in his I-shall-now-begin-a-long-sermon tone of voice. "Faithful Steward, thou may hath wondered where we are currently located; and this I tell you: we are but ten miles or furlongs or whatever measurement we Numenoreans use from the coast of Numenor. Yet I should declare that Numenor is no longer our destination!
"Nay; for I have ordered Random Henchman to turn to Lindon. In that place I shall bow before the Elvenqueen Daerorchalmeluirin, and beg that High Elven lady render me aid in a quest that I deem most crucial. For you see, Faithful Steward, it hath come to my attention that a sinister plot is a'brewin' in Armenelos! A sinister plot so sinister that it's sinisterness shall make your sinuses ache in sinister pain!
"Hear now my story, Faithful Steward! For a great long while, I hath been concerned with Tar-Calion, or Ar-Pharazon in our Adunaic tongue. You see, Faithful Steward, not once has he posted in this RP, and that is a dreadful realization to realize! For what is Numenor without its King; a King of the high and noble Line of Elros! Nay; do not speak, for I shall tell you! Numenor without a King, a King of the Line of Elros, is a Numenor Downfallen! And that is something in which we simply cannot abide!
"Surely, Faithful Steward, you wonder of what it is that I speak. Know thee now that the Counselor Palpatine has secretly seized the Sceptre of Armenelos! Gasp, you say, and indeed you do say it with good reason! For Counselor Palpatine was beloved by all Men of Westernesse, and none suspected that he was actually Darth Sidious; except for just about everybody who saw the first three movies. And that, Faithful Steward, is everyone! Except, perhaps, the same freaks who have never gazed upon the Holy Grail of the Lord Python; but they are underserving of their lordly lineage. In this, I am sure you agree.
"But I digress! You see, Faithful Steward, there is a Shadow cast upon Numenor, and it can only be cast aside with a great strength of arms, provided to us by the Elvenqueen Daerorchalmeluirin and her High Elven High Elves. Do you understand this counsel? Indeed; we arm for battle, and if need be, a coup d'etat!"
And finally he shut up. For a second.
"...did you need me to repeat any of that? Because I can."
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Posted: Sun May 15, 2005 10:05 pm
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Posted: Mon May 16, 2005 4:03 pm
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