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Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 11:36 am
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The following works of writing are for those who wish to excel further and develop their skills of language better.
To start off, I'd like for someone to criticize my poem, "You Treat Me Like I'm No One"
I feel like it's missing something so input is greatly appreciated ^^
You Treat Me Like I'm No One
You treat me like I'm no one. No heart, no voice, no head. And to the world that's out there, I guess I'm just walking dead.
Without the fear of being myself But yet I still wander alone Because of that day, you left me for her, Turning fire into stone.
My heart took all the fury and hurt. My eyes blocked out the sight. And dreams went like unguarded horrors That frigid winters' night.
Yes, you told me forever. Spoken on the common day. And now it seems like yesterday, You took that all away.
Did forever really come that soon? Only time can tell, I'm sorry I left in the afternoon, My little "vacation" to hell.
I might not ever return But who is full of tears? And to you, my one lost love, You'll see me in your fears.
Lost agony, but found again, One dead winter's night. He's there alone, he'll try again To die before morning's light.
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Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 6:29 pm
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Spreading The Word Vice Captain
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Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 4:56 pm
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