I was lurking in te internets

[FuzzBall 005]

And found this. Thought everyone else thought it might be funny. Im thinking it might be off topic but Idk...oh well if it is whats done is done.

Drama-generating Techniques
1.Question the Bible.
2.Ask what year Jesus was born.
3.Ask if he's a b*****d child.
4.Ask how many people were at his tomb.
5.Ask why a crucified criminal was put in a tomb instead of a mass grave. Fun-fact if they can't answer: One of his followers paid for the tomb.
6.Make note of their homophobia.
7.Remind them of their latent homosexuality.
8.Remind them if that they truly beleived in Jesus, they wouldn't argue about it.
9.Ask why the talking snake is literal but Jesus' command to sell everything they own is metaphorical.
10.Give an intelligent, well-researched explanation of Einstein's views on religion.
11.Give an intelligent, well-researched explanation of Hitler's views on religion.
12.Give an intelligent, well-researched explanation of anything.
13.Give unintelligent, poorly-researched explanations of everything.
14.Ask if Cain and Abel had sex with each other or Eve to make more people.
15.Point out that, based on the appearance of every other individual in the area he was born, Jesus was clearly either black or brown.
16.Point at the gold cross dangling from their necklace and accuse them of worshipping a graven idol. (A golden one, no less!)
17.Explain to them how they would worship an electric chair or a poison gas chamber if Jesus died 20 - 50 years ago.
18.Say that Christians are tools of the Jewish-dominated Neoconservatives in control of the Republican Party.
19.Say that Mary was likely only a technical virgin, considering that Jews circa 5 BCE were highly patriarchial.
20.Say that Christianity is nothing but Judaism, version 2.0...
21.... and thus, Islam must be Judaism, version 3.0.
22.Gently wipe the tears that begin pouring from their eyes.
23.Proceed with ******* their virgin mothers.
24.You can also place bibles from your local library or book store in the "fiction" section for added bonus.
25.Make a point that Jesus had two fathers.  

[Captain_Shinzo]

Common sense but works.
Don't forget to add a "Warning: Work of Fiction " to all hotel books and to censor the work God on any literature you can. ( G*d )  

[=X-Sparker + AquaKiller=]

25 mega-watts of burn burn burn!
rofl

 

[[-Erik-]]

Nubmer 24 is ******** win.

 

[brainnsoup]

lol @ 10-13.

 

[dl1371]

brainnsoup

lol @ 10-13.

yeah