It seems as though few people have posted in this forum for a little while, so I think I will~ I hope it's in the right place, though. It may be suited to another forum perhaps.
I want to tell everyone about my little crush! This is gonna get pretty long as it is a recount of my entire nonexistent relationship with a boy I like. redface
There's this boy, who is (as far as I can tell) as straight as an arrow, whom I have "known" for a little more than three years. Now, I say "'known'", because I don't necessarily know him... considering I've had very limited interaction with him, and yet I know quite a bit about him sweatdrop Hehehehe.... I admit, I've done a little facebook stalking... and I may have followed him around school once... or twice....
Okay, I admit it. I'm a bit creepy. But I can't help being so infatuated, it's in my nature!
Anyhoo, in 7th grade, I sat next to him in my [generic] science class, and from there we became acquaintances. This was around the time that was horribly, horribly shy, AND I just come out of the closet. So, even though it was impossible for him to know (considering the girl behind me kept asking me all the questions about my homosexuality stare ), he never mentioned it. I still felt extremely awkward around him, considering I was just starting to crush on him. I learned that we both had a lot of the same interests (including drawing, our love of anime, our love of Hayao Miyasaki, and more), although I completely blew it because I was also a compulsive liar, and he pretty quickly figured that out. No joke. 7th grade was my problem year.
Anyhoo, it was super obvious that I had a crush on him, considering I'm a blusher and he is... well, he has a dirty sense of humour redface redface redface ...I'm also a starer. So after that things got a little bit awkward, but he was still really friendly and sweet, and I was glad that I could be with him, even if it was for only an hour a day.
Of course, then I told my 'friend' about my little crush. I'm sure you can guess what happened next. Pretty soon, everyone knew about it (or at least it just proved what they were thinking was true), and although no one was making a huge deal out of it, I was freaking out! After that, I couldn't even look him in the eye, and things got REAL awkward. So, I rarely had any interaction with him after that. The following year were in only one class together, but he sat very far away. He has attempted to make a joke once in a while or start up a conversation, but I would get nervous and either end the conversation with a nervous laugh and "yeah", or I would find a reason to walk away.
Terrible, right? Although I'm sure the fact that he teased me about a few times makes up for it. It was lighthearted and once he noticed that I didn't find it funny, he stopped. It was really embarrassing, though.
I think that the worst moment that I regret not talking to was in art class of 8th grade. We were working in groups of two to create... some sort of box... thing... who knows? We sat a large tables so two groups would work on their projects on at each table, so, since I refused to move from my table, my friend came to work with me. Unfortunately, he came to work the friend whom I had previously shared the table with. So I had to keep my eyes glued to our project the entire time.
Then... my partner had to leave to get some more paint, while continued to hot glue random pieces of wood to our box in the name of surrealism. Even though, it meant nothing. (Me and my friend are lazy and know nothing of symbolism.) And so, since his partner had left as well, that left me alone with him. It would've been fine had he not ask what our project was supposed to represent.
I'm sure you can guess what happened next. I mumbled something random about it, but apparently that didn't satisfy, so he had to ask a follow up question. I looked at his face, turned beet red, and made up an excuse to go help my friend with what she was doing.
Irk...
However, present day (9th grade), I've been making some progress, due to the help of my new friend in my lit class that I complained about in the school related forum just a few hours ago. She thought that the whole thing was just adorable, and so she pushed me try saying hello to him once in a while. The first time I managed to do it was in my classic style. Yelling "HELLO!" at him and waving from about thirty yards away on top of a hill.
Note: I'm much less inhibited now.
He waved back, too!
Hehehehe....
Although that was in the beginning of the year when it was still warm out... and I haven't said hey to him again, since we're not allowed outside and I can't muster up the courage to say it to him up close.
But now, I've decided that tomorrow, (well, today, really... it's 3 in the morning), I'm going to say hello! I'm serious! I'll do it! It may just be a mixture of two Monsters and sleep deprivation, but I've convinced my self. I'm come back after school and post what happened.
If none of you think my infatuation is creepy, as I do, then maybe I'll update frequently, hehehe...
I want to tell everyone about my little crush! This is gonna get pretty long as it is a recount of my entire nonexistent relationship with a boy I like. redface
There's this boy, who is (as far as I can tell) as straight as an arrow, whom I have "known" for a little more than three years. Now, I say "'known'", because I don't necessarily know him... considering I've had very limited interaction with him, and yet I know quite a bit about him sweatdrop Hehehehe.... I admit, I've done a little facebook stalking... and I may have followed him around school once... or twice....
Okay, I admit it. I'm a bit creepy. But I can't help being so infatuated, it's in my nature!
Anyhoo, in 7th grade, I sat next to him in my [generic] science class, and from there we became acquaintances. This was around the time that was horribly, horribly shy, AND I just come out of the closet. So, even though it was impossible for him to know (considering the girl behind me kept asking me all the questions about my homosexuality stare ), he never mentioned it. I still felt extremely awkward around him, considering I was just starting to crush on him. I learned that we both had a lot of the same interests (including drawing, our love of anime, our love of Hayao Miyasaki, and more), although I completely blew it because I was also a compulsive liar, and he pretty quickly figured that out. No joke. 7th grade was my problem year.
Anyhoo, it was super obvious that I had a crush on him, considering I'm a blusher and he is... well, he has a dirty sense of humour redface redface redface ...I'm also a starer. So after that things got a little bit awkward, but he was still really friendly and sweet, and I was glad that I could be with him, even if it was for only an hour a day.
Of course, then I told my 'friend' about my little crush. I'm sure you can guess what happened next. Pretty soon, everyone knew about it (or at least it just proved what they were thinking was true), and although no one was making a huge deal out of it, I was freaking out! After that, I couldn't even look him in the eye, and things got REAL awkward. So, I rarely had any interaction with him after that. The following year were in only one class together, but he sat very far away. He has attempted to make a joke once in a while or start up a conversation, but I would get nervous and either end the conversation with a nervous laugh and "yeah", or I would find a reason to walk away.
Terrible, right? Although I'm sure the fact that he teased me about a few times makes up for it. It was lighthearted and once he noticed that I didn't find it funny, he stopped. It was really embarrassing, though.
I think that the worst moment that I regret not talking to was in art class of 8th grade. We were working in groups of two to create... some sort of box... thing... who knows? We sat a large tables so two groups would work on their projects on at each table, so, since I refused to move from my table, my friend came to work with me. Unfortunately, he came to work the friend whom I had previously shared the table with. So I had to keep my eyes glued to our project the entire time.
Then... my partner had to leave to get some more paint, while continued to hot glue random pieces of wood to our box in the name of surrealism. Even though, it meant nothing. (Me and my friend are lazy and know nothing of symbolism.) And so, since his partner had left as well, that left me alone with him. It would've been fine had he not ask what our project was supposed to represent.
I'm sure you can guess what happened next. I mumbled something random about it, but apparently that didn't satisfy, so he had to ask a follow up question. I looked at his face, turned beet red, and made up an excuse to go help my friend with what she was doing.
Irk...
However, present day (9th grade), I've been making some progress, due to the help of my new friend in my lit class that I complained about in the school related forum just a few hours ago. She thought that the whole thing was just adorable, and so she pushed me try saying hello to him once in a while. The first time I managed to do it was in my classic style. Yelling "HELLO!" at him and waving from about thirty yards away on top of a hill.
Note: I'm much less inhibited now.
He waved back, too!
Hehehehe....
Although that was in the beginning of the year when it was still warm out... and I haven't said hey to him again, since we're not allowed outside and I can't muster up the courage to say it to him up close.
But now, I've decided that tomorrow, (well, today, really... it's 3 in the morning), I'm going to say hello! I'm serious! I'll do it! It may just be a mixture of two Monsters and sleep deprivation, but I've convinced my self. I'm come back after school and post what happened.
If none of you think my infatuation is creepy, as I do, then maybe I'll update frequently, hehehe...
