well... an update.....
i'm not over her... because she was so amazing.....
but i'm doing better..... I hate her now, though... but still feel so attached to her....
she's just being extremely immature and a b***h.... and assuming a lot of s**t..... like my motivation behind my words.... i say "i give up" means "i want you back" ... she's like "i wish he'd stop trying to get between us...."
(aka my ex-good friend and her....)
but now i'm feeling a lot better because a new old love is starting to grow.... between me and somebody.... from this guild *suspicious shifty eyes*... dun dun dun......
but yeah..... recent events have made me realize how much this girl has really meant to me and how amazing she really is.... and she makes me so happy..... only one problem...... 3 years and 1000 miles is a bit of a challenge.... especially with a guy who has problems staying single.......
but i made a promise i'd stay single for a year at least....... just to breathe and such....
also let me add one more thing.... For Valentines day... that other girl.... bought me an 80 dollar sterling silver ring. (this was less than a month after we started going out...) and i told her i'd always wear it...
and I'm still wearing it... on a hemp necklace.... I'll always wear it... even if i hate her and even if i stop loving her..... I am a man of my word and i will prove my integrity. One reason is just to make her SUFFER and always know what she ******** put me through. To make her SEE i am a better ******** man than she'll ever see the likes of again!... I want her to die unloved for what she's done.
sorry..... a little bitterness and rage bursting out there.. heh...... but i will always wear this ring.... both as a testimony of my integrity, and a lesson learned through many many mistakes......
i just wish there weren't so many horribly amazing memories behind the rest of the millions of things she gave me...
and they're things i can't really give back because she'd throw them out or destroy them..... not to mention she has my sweater...... and if she gave it back i'd never be able to look at it let alone touch it....
*cough*... sorry for rambling....
but yeah......
i'm still wondering what to do.....
about her....
about this new old rekindled love....
about my life for the next 3 years........
*sigh*....