My Poen-"The Failed Attempt"

[Zeilix]

It got dark,
I wanted to die;
so I grabbed the blade and began to slice.

Blood ran;
It stained my soul.
I felt myself fading away.

My family screaming,
while you held me crying,
I wanted to come back but I fell and started to melt.

Was this Hell?
No, it was worse. It was Despair,
Guilt,
Saddness,
Anger,
Grief,
Darkness,
it was all these things and regret.

I awoke in sweat,
I started to cry,
I called for you,
and you came.

You saved me, but you just don't know it...

 

[rikaLeshay]

thumbs up  

[[. Negative Exposure .]]

That's really good. Beats my poem.  

[Galliah]

i like the "You saved me, but you just don't know it..." part
very creative  

[Zeilix]

Thanx...  

[Gambino Statue]

It's good. It has nice imagery in it.
Wow, I'm loving that word today.  

[[[blunt.object]]]

me likes.
it tells a story.
that's always nice.

its like a first-person story, but slightly twisted and skewed by muddled thoughts.
i like stuff like that.  

[Frizzzz]

Very good.

 

[Black_Innocence816]

you have a gift. well written