Something's missing....
Ever since i went to this new school up north...
I couldn't quite tell what was missing.
But today.. i found out one thing that is missing
During lunch at school i felt left out. cus last year someone was always trying to make me smile. or laugh. her name is ari. We are bestest best bestbest best fwernss since 1st grade. she was always there for me. when i needed to cry or when i needed advice. she's the one i trust.
So... i got bored during lunch.. and i was telling rachel about this dare my friends are making me do. Which is pretty nasty(i had to eat something michael ,my bf, licked during lunch) and she didn't really care..Then i started showing her my lyrics... She called them "My emo lyrics" and went back to talking to her other friends......so after those atempts i started thinking about the good times w/ ari and it made me smile a little bit. but it made me miss her more then i already do. then i felt soo.. invisible. i started singing quietly.. and i was being ignored even more. i mean they were listening too.. but ehh. i'm used to people going "OMG YOU HAVE SUCH A PRETTY VOICE" or something. but it was like I was the only Pentagon out of all these Circles and Squares and that those circles and squares couldn't see me. or if they did they were like "Oh that's a pentagon we don't wanna talk to a pentagon"
That's the most part.
I'm still trying to find out what else i think is missing.
I'm thinking another thing is that Mikey doesn't hit on me or anything just hugs.... he hasnt even tried kissing me. when he told my friend he was gonna kiss me. and he doesn't compliment me whenever i say something bad about myself(cus i remember my ex's.. whenever i said something like "I LOOK SO UGLY AND FAT" they go "OMG. No you don't! you are the most gorgeous girl i've ever seen" which i know that isn't true but it makes me feel better about myself).... he hardly does anything to make me feel special.. cus our hugging gets real boring cus we have been doing the same things from when we were just friends.
I can't make ALL the moves. i mean i already made most of them. i mean i even asked him out. and i like do all this s**t
I'm just so lost in what i want now.
I need something to look foward too at school other then seeing mikey. that's basicly why i don't ditch school.
Has someone felt something close to this or somewhere near it? and if anyone has what did they do to make themselves feel better?
Ever since i went to this new school up north...
I couldn't quite tell what was missing.
But today.. i found out one thing that is missing
During lunch at school i felt left out. cus last year someone was always trying to make me smile. or laugh. her name is ari. We are bestest best bestbest best fwernss since 1st grade. she was always there for me. when i needed to cry or when i needed advice. she's the one i trust.
So... i got bored during lunch.. and i was telling rachel about this dare my friends are making me do. Which is pretty nasty(i had to eat something michael ,my bf, licked during lunch) and she didn't really care..Then i started showing her my lyrics... She called them "My emo lyrics" and went back to talking to her other friends......so after those atempts i started thinking about the good times w/ ari and it made me smile a little bit. but it made me miss her more then i already do. then i felt soo.. invisible. i started singing quietly.. and i was being ignored even more. i mean they were listening too.. but ehh. i'm used to people going "OMG YOU HAVE SUCH A PRETTY VOICE" or something. but it was like I was the only Pentagon out of all these Circles and Squares and that those circles and squares couldn't see me. or if they did they were like "Oh that's a pentagon we don't wanna talk to a pentagon"
That's the most part.
I'm still trying to find out what else i think is missing.
I'm thinking another thing is that Mikey doesn't hit on me or anything just hugs.... he hasnt even tried kissing me. when he told my friend he was gonna kiss me. and he doesn't compliment me whenever i say something bad about myself(cus i remember my ex's.. whenever i said something like "I LOOK SO UGLY AND FAT" they go "OMG. No you don't! you are the most gorgeous girl i've ever seen" which i know that isn't true but it makes me feel better about myself).... he hardly does anything to make me feel special.. cus our hugging gets real boring cus we have been doing the same things from when we were just friends.
I can't make ALL the moves. i mean i already made most of them. i mean i even asked him out. and i like do all this s**t
I'm just so lost in what i want now.
I need something to look foward too at school other then seeing mikey. that's basicly why i don't ditch school.
Has someone felt something close to this or somewhere near it? and if anyone has what did they do to make themselves feel better?
