Human interaction.

[Niveous]

It is a proven fact that we as humans absolutely and without question NEED physical and emotional contact. From all the stories I've come across, with sick parents who neglected to offer a child the touch of skin or any form of real communication (locked in a room with just the bare minimums of water and food) They literally grew up mis-shapen and slightly retarded with a very short life span. (even after removed from their mini-prisons)

This is already proven (sad we even have proof) But I want to know how you feel AFTER childhood. Do we STILL need the same affections, even after childhood. If so, how often. How long can a human body/mind take isolation.

With the human abilities of memory and coping skills, could we literally surpass what was absolutely needed during childhood? Is the memory of touch alone good enough?

Or are we just fundamentally dependant on one another, even if it is the slightest and least taxing on others sort of interaction. I'm not talking about dependant of a specific person, just on a general need to interact with one another.  

[Lethkhar]

Humans are naturally social animals. It would stand to reason that we would naturally need a society...  

[Niveous]

Yes, but you must admit the trends are....strange....to say the least.

first, we are loosely grouped tribes of people. Huddled together in caves and huts, hunting and gathering in packs. Much like the wolf, our social system was similar enough that man domesticated the wolf as they tended to hunt and live beside us in many cases.

Later, we started farmland, and built close-knit houses and lived less closely, but it was still taboo to be one who does anything beyond the village limits.

Then, even more into the future, tightly condensed cities. Our need to escape the lonliness of eachother led to tribes, our fear of nature led to villages. Now, we have all these resources at our disposal, all this vast luxury to dull our primal fears. And yet, we grow far more isolated than ever before. Cubicles, and little offices and apartment buildings.

We have adapted technology so that we can still socialize without actually touch or sound, but merely sight alone.


So, how badly do we need hman touch....does it really lose its great impact after a certain age. Have we found loopholes around it, much like we did with socializing many years ago. Are these lopeholes merely temporary relief, and not an actual substitute?


(Im not joking about the wolf stuff either. Humans even had a greater sense of smell and hearing. We were literally monkey-wolves...cuz our social system was almost identicle) lol  

[PoeticVengeance]

Niveous

It is a proven fact that we as humans absolutely and without question NEED physical and emotional contact. From all the stories I've come across, with sick parents who neglected to offer a child the touch of skin or any form of real communication (locked in a room with just the bare minimums of water and food) They literally grew up mis-shapen and slightly retarded with a very short life span. (even after removed from their mini-prisons)

This is already proven (sad we even have proof) But I want to know how you feel AFTER childhood. Do we STILL need the same affections, even after childhood. If so, how often. How long can a human body/mind take isolation.

With the human abilities of memory and coping skills, could we literally surpass what was absolutely needed during childhood? Is the memory of touch alone good enough?

Or are we just fundamentally dependant on one another, even if it is the slightest and least taxing on others sort of interaction. I'm not talking about dependant of a specific person, just on a general need to interact with one another.

I require human contact and physical touch and I'm in my 20s.

I don't think any human being outgrows the need for affection, although that need may vary in its intensity based on the person.  

[Sanguvixen]

Human beings are social animals.

Yes...Humans are animals. Humans are also not the only social animals to thrive in groups.

Meercats, Lions, Wolves, and Ringtailed Lemurs are also social animals. Sometimes even crocodiles can be social. At least between a male and females. There are also some highly social birds that require phsycial contact with each other.

If you look to the rest of the animal world, and look specifically at the social ones....you can see that physical contact is a very important part of thier lives.

So the way I look at it the need to have contact with others of our species and physical touch is not a trait unique to humans. It is a trait unique to social groups of animals that live in close proximity of each other, and form family groups.

In that way I don't think we can outgrow the need for affection. It is something we depend upon for a peaceful existance.

Furthermore, how well you are able to show affection for others of your own species, and within your own family often is directly related to just how...successful and well off you will be. If you cannot show a decent amount of affection you might not be a part of whatever said group very long.

I know this from observation of my own father. He married my mom because he wanted to save his family name. It is a long story. Anyway he didn't know how to show affection to others. He only knew how to hurt people, and make them suffer.

My mother wanted to have a loving relationship, but how can you with a man that refuses to kiss, or even hug?

In the end his inablility to love other people, and to show affection in a correct manner is what caused my family to tear apart. My mom divorced him.

I myself feel no good feelings towards him. My brother is the same. My father will never see me again. When my brother graduates he is getting out of that household quickly. My father's inability to love has destroyed any chance of me having good relations with him, and has destoryed any chance of having good relations with my brother. The same has happened to his family. He is despised by all of his siblings.

He is a very hateful, spiteful, and bitter man.

So if you look at that situation, you can see that you just can't throw away the need for affection, and except to live ok, and to have a good normal life.

If you don't know how to love, and how to care for others, you won't make it very far family wise. My father thought he could use force and fear to keep his family together, but his inability to love, and show affection tore it apart anyway.

So...Human to Human contact, and the need for affection won't go away...because both things are needed for familes to be healthy. Without healthy families, you won't have a healthy population of people.

If everyone in a society is hateful, spiteful, and bitter, eventually they'll self-destuct.

 

[Pistil]

I'd have to look up the actual facts, but I believe that their are limitations on the length of time a prisoner can be in isolaton since they can and will go crazy.

I believe there are also studies that prove that people with less physical stimuli (touch) have a higher percentage of depression than the average person.  

[Niveous]

My gut tells me that you are 100% right Poetic Vengence.
I still can't seem to shake a few nagging doubts thought.
Hence why I created this discussion ^-^

Pistil, yes...you are absolutely right. Still, I wonder if a prisoner is more prone to needing affection since they feel the need to lash out at the law (granted some laws are more legal than helpful to society...not all prisoners are messed up mentally) Maybe if you had a study of a regular very carefree person placed in isolation, that would definately shut me up lol

Consider that some prisoners are neglected from the get go. I did mention that affection was NEEDED during childhood. Most prisoners have just enough to appear normal...just enough before they wind up in prison. I'de need an example where someone had the whole 100 yards of loving parents, and personal growth during childhood..THEN have that person cut off for a while.


Last but not least...my long winded friend. I'm very glad you decided to open up and use your chldhood like that as an example. I know from experience it takes a lot to do that. I'm sorry to hear your father was one who needed much emotional growth. Parents need to be healthy to raise healthy kids. That's just simple stuff. I think some people should be banned from relationships...sort of a "time-out" for grown ups.

Nice animal examples too, I see you're a fan as well. I'm fully aware what your trying to say. Some birds die when their mate dies. You did fail to notice (AND IM NOT BEING CONDECENDING) humans are just slightly different from the rest of the animal kingdom....god knows if its good or bad. But we do possess what APPEARS to be deeper cognitive capabilities. Things like memories and loopholes.

Example: Here I am alone, but I have millions of books....authors speaking to me for lifetimes to come. (Bad twilight zone reference) still...we DO have loopholes.


Example: I remember ____ and how we used to play tag together and look up at the sky. I always carry their memory in my heart... (yes.....its a block buster teen flick I suppose)

In any event, it is clear we have an edge over our innate needs. Sure we NEED them at first.....no question there. This discussion revolves around after childhood.

Are we just that damn cocky as to defy instincts. We're doing a good job so far! Society is getting more and more closed. I can text someone in cuba sure, but how often do I play with "the gang" across the railroad tracks. Less and less(that seems to be the trend anyway)

I don't want to intrude on your family....kinda avoiding it because it might be painful. But I think you're confusing lack of affection for spite. Just because I dont...touch or hug you.....doesn't mean I hate you.....and lash out at you...and avoid you. all it means is the intimacy of our meetings is cut short.

You're father clearly needed affection, but was afraid of showing it for one reason or another (maybe deep down he was convinced he didn't deserve love and hurt eveyone around him)

This only tells me he is without a proper childhood. He is imcomplete..sure the man knows his math, taxes, english, scrambled eggs and toast....and lives like a man. But his emotional growth seems severely stunted. And he even tried to latch on to a family.....not a good example for proving my doubts right or wrong.....it just doens't met the whacky stadards I placed for the hypothetical.


I'de need a stable.....complete person.....living in isolation AFTER childhood....and that person either incapable...or fully capable of embracing it. And this person utilized all those loopholes and memories....and they were either effective or just not enough.  

[Sanguvixen]

My father didn't want to be loved. He was(and still is) a hateful, sadistic b*****d who wanted to shut himself away, and live in his own little world.

He loathed touching, hated affection, and loved to abuse, both emotionally and physically.

His idea of love was to beat a person till they are black and blue.

Every once in a while a person can get away with seperating themselves from soceity. But usually they have animal companions. A lot of people who live alone, and prefer to be alone often have cats or dogs.

That is how thier need for affection is forfilled.

We are cocky in many aspects. To me the idea of turning on the need to socialize and have phsyical affection is probably possible, but not highly recommended.

 

[Pistil]

I personally doubt memories alone would suffice. I've gone a few weeks without any physical contact with any other person (I was still around people though). I did attempt to use memories, but touch is like pain - the specifics are easily forgotten. I mean, think about that time you sliced your hand - no WAY you could recall just how much pain you were in (*hypothetical situation*) The same thing goes for touch. You know the mechanics, and know that it was there, but can't recall exactly what the feeling was.

So you're gonna crave it. And when you crave something that's not available, you look for something that might suppress it. In the case of touch, you can always just touch yourself (yeah yeah, bad wording). But this is a lot less effective than one would think. It's like trying to tickle yourself, quite hard to accomplish - because your brain KNOWS its your hand.

Anyway, after the two weeks I was on the bus and some guy sat beside me and accidentally bumped my knee with his leg. It scared the bejeezus out of me, since I had already forgotten what it felt like. Of course, it was just like a reset button and I pretty much stopped wondering what touch felt like for another little while.

But overall I doubt I've gotten as much physical contact as the average person. Could explain why I am so damn ticklish and avoid contact with people in a lot of circumstances.