So I was teaching Christianity to this girl, and...

[reverie0312]

...I started thinking, being trapped between being a hypocrite and getting put on lockdown is really not cool.

I'm a (deeply closeted) atheist living in a hyper-religious house. Admitting my lack of belief would get me literally grounded until I escaped off to college (only one year!), throw my parents into a desperate fight to save their daughter from hell, give my grandparents heart attacks, and turn every waking hour at my home into a vicious battleground. I'm currently posing as a liberal, tolerant Christian, which results in a couple of fights and a helluva lot of eye rolling, but keeps me sane enough.

Unfortunately, the fact that I'm a leader in all of the activities I actually chose to be involved in means I was unable to come up with a suitable excuse for ducking out of being a senior mentor at my parent's church this year.

I feel horribly guilty, because I'm teaching these kids things that I don't believe. Even with a very liberal interpretation, I can't escape some of the crap that's in the Bible/accepted church doctrine. For instance, we're all sinful and can't hope to save ourselves, sexual "purity" until marriage is the only option, talking to invisible guys in the sky is a good way to heal your dying grandmother, you should evangelize, etc.

I don't suppose anyone has any suggestions for extricating myself from this unhappy situation?  

[Theophrastus]

Fairyfly

...I started thinking, being trapped between being a hypocrite and getting put on lockdown is really not cool.

I'm a (deeply closeted) atheist living in a hyper-religious house. Admitting my lack of belief would get me literally grounded until I escaped off to college (only one year!), throw my parents into a desperate fight to save their daughter from hell, give my grandparents heart attacks, and turn every waking hour at my home into a vicious battleground. I'm currently posing as a liberal, tolerant Christian, which results in a couple of fights and a helluva lot of eye rolling, but keeps me sane enough.

Unfortunately, the fact that I'm a leader in all of the activities I actually chose to be involved in means I was unable to come up with a suitable excuse for ducking out of being a senior mentor at my parent's church this year.

I feel horribly guilty, because I'm teaching these kids things that I don't believe. Even with a very liberal interpretation, I can't escape some of the crap that's in the Bible/accepted church doctrine. For instance, we're all sinful and can't hope to save ourselves, sexual "purity" until marriage is the only option, talking to invisible guys in the sky is a good way to heal your dying grandmother, you should evangelize, etc.

I don't suppose anyone has any suggestions for extricating myself from this unhappy situation?

You can come live in my basement and sleep with our bunny in her large cage. XD

Idunno...all I could suggest is some Harriet Tubman style underground activity. But it's hard to trust kids to keep secrets. Maybe you should focus your mentoring more on real life skills rather than religious things. I'm sorry you're in this pickle, kid.

It's how I always say, though - unless you're willing and able to support yourself through alternate means, coming out Atheist among a very religious family may well be a ticket to the curb. Remember, you're not under contract to proselytize for Atheism, or to be heartbroken over not following some imagined Atheist Ten Commandments. If you really want to make a difference I suppose you could e-mail those kids later and explain why you said what you did and what you really believe. c_c Tough times.  

[Tenth Speed Writer]

It's nothing to feel too guilty about..


Christianity, if properly taught, can also be a useful way to instill good morales and respect for others into the young ones. It's when you have far-right nut-job preachers doing nothing but telling them they're right and to push their beliefs on everyone else that we have a problem.

Since they're coming up in that kind of environment anyway, if anything, you're helping them. cool  

[Theophrastus]

That's a pretty fair statement, TSW. There are places, believe it or not, where Christianity and Secular Humanism intersect, so just try to hover around that stance so you don't feel like you're compromising yourself or your task.  

[Baron von Turkeypants]

You won't have eyes tonight. You won't have ears or a tongue; you will wander the underworld blind, deaf and dumb...

My favorite Christians are the St. Thomas ones, because they're so mysterious.

...and all the dead will know: this is Hector, fool who thought he killed Achilles.

 

[Sanguvixen]

I agree with what someone else said. You can try to focus on the things that have less to do with religion, and more with just being a good person.

For instance, try to teach how to be tolerent of those with differing viewpoints without necessarily accepting what is different.

Or, how to love "Thy neighbor" even if thy neighbor isn't of the same belief.

 

[AnonymouZ]

Nothing to feel guilty about? *throws up*

*throws up again as he tries to type again* ... *cleans himself up*

Well, i don't really think a dude that goes to church and prays, even tho he's not a closet atheist, should really have a say in this matter. Because THAT's the kind of hypocrite she's talking about.

That's not christianity you're talking about either TSW... that's MORALS. VALUES. and ... whatever else the ******** people call them these days. They don't have NOTHING to do with how they teach you to praise and eat the flesh of your god.

I can say the same s**t for Hinduism, Islam, Zionism or even Satanism and say that "IF PROPERLY TAUGHT" they would help the world live in peace. *throws up at the "it's a pink, lovely and wonderful word" thought*

JEEEEZZZ.

On the other hand. If you really want to get out of that one, you could probably say that kids are asking too many questions and let someone else be in charge of the kids (you can't be the only senior mentor... or are you?) Maybe come up with some "obligatory volunteering" somewhere else; too much homework at school; getting that mysterious flu-thing that only attacks on the days you're supposed to mentor... cuz... i mean there is not really a way to get out of this rather ugly situation than being a hypocrite again.

What theo says tho... i think rings more truth than anything.

Quote:

...you're not under contract to proselytize for Atheism, or to be heartbroken over not following some imagined Atheist Ten Commandments.

Besides, what's wrong with being a hypocrite...?




But really dude... did you really expect a real way to get out of this one? it's almost impossible...! This kind of stuff makes ME sad. evil  

[reverie0312]

Baron von Turkeypants

You won't have eyes tonight. You won't have ears or a tongue; you will wander the underworld blind, deaf and dumb...

My favorite Christians are the St. Thomas ones, because they're so mysterious.

...and all the dead will know: this is Hector, fool who thought he killed Achilles.

What do you mean?  

[Levis Pennae]

In my opinion personal beliefs should stand above all else. I live in a moderately religious house right now. But before, I lived in the south, conservative religious capital east of the Mississippi. Now growing up this environment I understand that standing up at the dinner table and screaming out "This is all sh--, I'm an ATHEIST!!" isn't exactly the right thing to do. What I would do in your situation is slowly faze yourself out of the religious circle your family has created. Ask to be removed from the church mentor program at your church, citing other legitimate reason. Remember the key to this is to use as little lying as possible. I do this all the time when I find myself in hyper religious situations, or any other situations like that. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING HERE IS THAT OMISSION IS YOUR FRIEND.  

[Theophrastus]

Levis Pennae

In my opinion personal beliefs should stand above all else. I live in a moderately religious house right now. But before, I lived in the south, conservative religious capital east of the Mississippi. Now growing up this environment I understand that standing up at the dinner table and screaming out "This is all sh--, I'm an ATHEIST!!" isn't exactly the right thing to do. What I would do in your situation is slowly faze yourself out of the religious circle your family has created. Ask to be removed from the church mentor program at your church, citing other legitimate reason. Remember the key to this is to use as little lying as possible. I do this all the time when I find myself in hyper religious situations, or any other situations like that. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING HERE IS THAT OMISSION IS YOUR FRIEND.

Yeah, lying is one of the last things you want to do as an Atheist - you're already under such intense scrutiny, there's no reason to give fundies any ammo with their lame "Atheists have no morals" argument.  

[Levis Pennae]

That's why I heart heart omission, it is the best tactic for debates. Just look at politics.  

[Tenth Speed Writer]

Anon:
I disagree.

You'd be surprised how incapable many folks are of embracing some semblance of common sense without something they perceive as beyond them to tell them to do so.


A good friend of mine, a very devout Christian, has admitted to me almost proudly that if he didn't think God existed, he'd drink and screw until he couldn't see straight. And he isn't a half-bad person at heart.

Humans are just followers by nature. The mind is like lightening, it tends to go down the path of least resistance. If given a choice between scrutinizing every move you make for the rest of your life, or never having to consider your decisions past whether they agree with what Brother Reverend talked about last Sunday, then at heart, most would take the latter.  

[Levis Pennae]

That reminds of what my scoutmaster said on the point of reverent (I am a Venture/Boy scout). He said that a scout should be reverent because if he/she is not, then there is really no point in being a good person or "doing a good turn everyday". During that same trip I was the first to respond to an injured person. I was congratulated many times. But when he said that it was basically translated in my mind "If you don't believe in a god, then your a bad person". Is this a proper analogy of what he said?  

[reverie0312]

Levis Pennae

In my opinion personal beliefs should stand above all else. I live in a moderately religious house right now. But before, I lived in the south, conservative religious capital east of the Mississippi. Now growing up this environment I understand that standing up at the dinner table and screaming out "This is all sh--, I'm an ATHEIST!!" isn't exactly the right thing to do. What I would do in your situation is slowly faze yourself out of the religious circle your family has created. Ask to be removed from the church mentor program at your church, citing other legitimate reason. Remember the key to this is to use as little lying as possible. I do this all the time when I find myself in hyper religious situations, or any other situations like that. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING HERE IS THAT YOUR FRIEND.

What legitimate excuse do you recommend? I've already tried all of the ones I can think of. "I'm too busy" is true but insufficient -- my parents said that if I was really too busy, I could quit my extracurriculars and stop hanging out with my friends. "I don't feel qualified" would raise a helluva lot of eyebrows and put me under some intense scrutiny, because, beleiver or not, I have by far the best grasp on theology of any of the youth participating in the program, and all the adults involved know that. "I hate teaching/talking in front of people" would be laughed at, because I'm on the debate team and take part in social activism that requires both teaching and talking in front of people. "I don't want to" is true but gets results only in sermons about how I should devote more of my time to God.  

[Kurai Keiro]

Fairyfly

Levis Pennae

In my opinion personal beliefs should stand above all else. I live in a moderately religious house right now. But before, I lived in the south, conservative religious capital east of the Mississippi. Now growing up this environment I understand that standing up at the dinner table and screaming out "This is all sh--, I'm an ATHEIST!!" isn't exactly the right thing to do. What I would do in your situation is slowly faze yourself out of the religious circle your family has created. Ask to be removed from the church mentor program at your church, citing other legitimate reason. Remember the key to this is to use as little lying as possible. I do this all the time when I find myself in hyper religious situations, or any other situations like that. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING HERE IS THAT YOUR FRIEND.

What legitimate excuse do you recommend? I've already tried all of the ones I can think of. "I'm too busy" is true but insufficient -- my parents said that if I was really too busy, I could quit my extracurriculars and stop hanging out with my friends. "I don't feel qualified" would raise a helluva lot of eyebrows and put me under some intense scrutiny, because, beleiver or not, I have by far the best grasp on theology of any of the youth participating in the program, and all the adults involved know that. "I hate teaching/talking in front of people" would be laughed at, because I'm on the debate team and take part in social activism that requires both teaching and talking in front of people. "I don't want to" is true but gets results only in sermons about how I should devote more of my time to God.

Or you could claim that teaching these, poor, innocent kids based on your liberal Christian views is a bad, bad thing. Very subtly, though.

Wh00t, fellow debater. smile What kind of debate do you do? (I do policy/CX, so if yours is somewhat like that, just increase the time you spend practicing, and claim you need more time to improve your skills.)