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 Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 7:24 pm
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Spyke: Brian, stop putting cameras in the chimney. Santa doesn't exist. You're in denial.
Brian: You're a non-believer, Spyke!? Don't worry, you'll come to your senses soon.
Spyke: Right... so, um, what did you get Ritz?
Brian dropped his voice.
Brian: I got her... a teddy bear! That's holding a box of chocolates!
Spyke was shocked.
Spyke: Wow. Pretty generic, but good nonetheless.
Brian: What'd you get her!?
Spyke: Uh... well... that's kind of where I need your help...
Brian: You didn't get her anything.
Spyke: Well... no.
Brian: Spyke, shame! Santa will bring you coal if you don't get her anything!
Spyke: Eh, I highly doubt that, but it's honestly because I have no idea what to get.
Brian: Sparkly! Something sparkly! It has some strange effect on girls... though I personally don't get it.
Spyke: I suppose... what's sparkly?
Brian: Uh... a cookie with sparkly glitter stuff!
Spyke: You're just looking for an excuse to get more cookies.
Brian: >.> ... of course not...
Spyke: Come on!
Brian: Ok ok ok. How about... a boyfriend?
Spyke blushed.
Spyke: W-what!?
Brian: A BOYFRIEND. It's english. I swear.
Spyke: No, I heard what you said. But why!?
Brian casually went back to decorating the tree.
Brian: She just seems like she needs one of those. She's always working all the time. Galactic Federation this, alien race that, blah blah blah. She needs a guy. But I have no idea where we'd get one...
Spyke: Well maybe we could, uh, you know...
Brian: What? Oh, how about E-Bay! I heard you could buy babies off of E-Bay too!
Spyke: Ok, no. First off, that's illegal. Second, that's really creepy. But I was thinking more of something like... you know... well-
Brian: Freyr! We could hook her up with Freyr!
Spyke: ... Brian, Freyr is a robot.
Brian: Yes, which is why they'd be geeky enough for each other!
Spyke: *Sigh* I think I'm just gonna-
Brian: Aha! I got it!
Spyke: Really, I don't think your ideas are very-
Brian: No, you'll see! It'll be perfect!
Before Spyke could stop him, Brian had run off upstairs.
Spyke: For the love of Ra, I can never find good advice...
---
And so Christmas morning rolled around.
The three housemates all walked downstairs and gathered around the tree to exchange gifts.
But when it came time for Spyke to give his present to Ritz... he had nothing.
Instead...
Brian: Spyke, I believe you left your present over here!
Spyke: Oh, uh ok...
Brian: Ritz, you might have to come over here too.
Ritz: If whatever this is explodes, I'll definitely melt your Transformer toy into a lunch plate.
But what Brian had was nothing either had intended.
Mistletoe was suddenly presented above the heads of Spyke and Ritz.
And within seconds, a quick kiss was exchanged between the two, Spyke blushing in the aftermath.
Spyke: Brian, that's... wow...
Brian: Damn! It didn't work!
Spyke: Wait... what?
Brian: I hired a muscle guy from some dating service but he didn't show up!
Brian called to the kitchen.
Brian: Good job, Jorge, you missed your entrance! No dinero para tu!
Jorge: NOOO, MI FAMILIA!!!!
* * * * *
Decided to bust out one of these for the season. Merry Christmas, everyone biggrin
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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 7:52 pm
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Posted: Sun Dec 23, 2007 10:00 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 10:15 am
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*dies laughing*
at the risk of plaigarism, I wanna do it too!
Everan: ...so Kamile.
Kamile has effectively climbed their Christmas tree, which is outside, contains their house, and no longer contains popcorn as Kamile got hungry.
Kamile: *stretches to hang a decorated pine cone on a branch* Yeah?
Everan: So this stupid human holiday...what are we doing it for?
Kamile: 'Cause elves never thought of it, and it's cool.
Everan: You know we're supposed to give presents?
Kamile is down the tree in seconds, eyes glowing with awe.
Kamile: WE GET PRESENTS!!!!
Everan: Um, yeah. What do you--
Kamile: Oh wow oh WOW we get presents! Why, though? I mean, is it like a birthday?
EVeran: someone else's birthday, yeah. Listen, what do you--
Kamile: Whose?
Everan: hell if I know. The point is that you give each other stuff instead of the other guy. Humans never make much sense. Anyway:
Kamile: But we get PRESENTS! That's so cool! What're you getting?
Everan: I don't know. It's a surprise.
Kamile: Where do they come from?
Everan: Uh....*sigh* Santa.
Kamile: Who? O.O
Everan: some big fat guy that comes down the chimney. I dunno. he has presents.
Kamile: ...but Everan...we don't have a chimney....
Everan: it's okay. That's not really the important part. he comes to everyone.
Kamile: WOW! That's awesome! Didja talk to him?
Everan: *sighs again* Yeah.
Kamile: What did he say? What did he get me, Everan?
Everan: well, he wants to know what you want....
Kamile: *blinkblink* I get to pick?
Everan: ...yeah. But I mean, stuff like money and parents and stuff--
Kamile: *ignores* Well, wow. I get to pick.
EVeran: yeah...so what do you want, Kamile?
Kamile: *turns and blinks at him, then grins* I get to PICK! That's the nicest thing anyone's ever done, Everan, you get to pick what you want oh wow....
Kamile turns and climbs the tree again.
Everan: *blinkblink* *shouts* But what do you want?
Kamile: *distantly* Nothing, I don't want anything, HE'S the one that should be getting something! What's he wnat, EVeran, what do I give him?
Everan: *sigh* He just wants to give you something you'll like.
--CHRISTMAS EVE--
Everan had told her that the presents would be at the base of their tree, so Kamile decided to sleep there and wait for Santa. Everan lets her, too preoccupied with finding a present that will make her happy. Finally, he has an idea; he sets off, covering Kamile, who is already asleep, with another blanket. He hopes that it will work.
--CHRISTMAS DAY--
Everan climbs down their richly decorated tree to find Kamile crying.
Everan: What's wrong?
Kamile: I fell asleep! He came, he came, but I was sleeping and he didn't take my present....
She gestures to something wrapped in a blanket, and starts crying again.
Everan: No, don't cry, Kamile...he wanted you to have it. Santa doesn't want any presents.
Kamile: But I worked so hard on it!
Everan: he knows. And he really liked it, but he had to leave it behind. He brought you something, you know.
Kamile: *immediately perks up* He did! What?
Everan smiles and whistles, and a red squirrel with a ribbon tied around its neck hops down from the trees and onto Everan's hand, presenting Kamile a candied nut. Kamile stares.
Kamile: Is that for me?
Everan: Yeah. Do you like it?
Kamile starts crying again. Everan blinks, unsure of what he has done. Kamile runs and hugs him; the squirrel gets out of the way.
Kamile: Wow Everan that's so cool how'd he do that I thought the squirrels were sleeping--
Everan: Well, they were. But see, there was a squirrel family that wasn't, because they were out of nuts and hungry. So I--um, so Santa said that if one of them gave you your present and played with you a little, then he'd give them all the nuts they wanted. So one did, and they got nuts for Christmas. *defensively* Santa is an elf after all.
They look at the squirrel, who has eaten the nut and is watching them from their tree. Everan sighs.
Everan: well so much for that....
Kamile: You did all that for me?
Everan: yeah, but...oh.
He realizes his mistake. Kamile beams at him and hugs him again.
Kamile: I knew it I knew it I KNEW you were Santa, Everan! 'Cause you can do anything! I knew it I knew it I knew--
She grabs her blanket and extracts a piece of bark parchment from it, covered in glitter and clumsy letters. Everan does not know where she got glitter but can tell that she put a lot of effort into it; she can't write, but she has tried to make it look like characters anyway.
Kamile: Merry Christmas!
Everan takes the card and looks at it; he can read his name on there, the only word she knew how to write, and though the rest is illegible, he knows it says "thank you"
Everan: merry christmas to you too, Kamile.
The squirrel starts eating the honey and nuts off of their pinecones, but they let him. It is Christmas after all.
This is fuuuuuuuuun. ^^
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 12:56 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 2:11 pm
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Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 10:56 pm
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Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 11:14 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 9:32 am
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Posted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 3:40 pm
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