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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 7:41 pm
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Lily I seek out words like a poacher. I want to steal them from the mouths of lovers, friends, enemies. I want to digest every vowel, every consonant, every silence.
And my grandmother yells, “what do you believe in?” She says, “I am open-minded, spill.” I say, No, you are handsovereardrums, you are bowing in front of something you never questioned. You are a box I cannot fit into. You are sealed tight, uptight, back aching from spending so much time on the floor. But grandmother I will still tell you, because I am not afraid. Simply. Not. Afraid.
I believe in strangers looking into the eyes of other strangers searching for something they can’t seem to locate. I believe in fairies that rose out of the cocoons I made for them on Grandpa’s farm. I believe in the hideouts, forts, and treehouses we all have as children and eventually give up on only to find out as adults that now more than ever we could use a secret place to go to on those days when our hearts feel like pancakes that were not flipped properly and crumbled to pieces. I believe that love is like chocolate; you melt into the experience and once it’s gone, the taste still lingers. However I do not believe that chocolate can replace summer mornings with tea and poetry and someone else’s fingertips. I believe in the hidden sensuality pulsing underneath dark energy. I believe that secret friendships are the best kind of friendships there are. To have no one else know that this person holds your world up and yet doesn’t demand to receive your body in return. I believe that men have stayed silent for far too long and we owe it to them to teach them how to praise vulnerability. To not see it only as “being open to an attack.” To learn that we do not tremble only when a tornado is approaching We tremble under the weight of those we love. We tremble when something reaches so deeply inside of us that we are prepared to devote our entire lives to it. We tremble when the thought comes to us that this is living. I believe in screaming on mountaintops, throwing the nearest objects at walls, and never forgetting what gets us out of bed each morning. I believe that every Being we pass by leaves an imprint on us. I believe that the number of stars you see when you look out your window is how many people are in need of someone to talk to at that moment. I believe that people are getting tired of staring at screens all day long. I believe that he will become the person he is longing to be even though I may not be around to see it happen. I believe that they will find peace this summer, that they will find themselves so deeply embedded in the other, and they will smile when they realize this is the summer their life begins together. No more separations. I believe that one day my mother will stop trying to outrun herself. Will stop kicking open bathroom doors that I have locked myself into to get away from her and will stop requiring a wine bottle to feel good about the person she is. I believe that soon my father will realize he missed out on the chance to know his daughter and the person she is becoming. The ocean she could have gave him. I believe that one day, the dictator I lived under for 13 years will be able to let go. Simply let go.
But most of all, I believe that if we have love for ourselves, for others, and for the land, we can survive anything.
_______________________________________________________ Author's Comments
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 7:53 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:05 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:10 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 11:17 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 6:31 am
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 10:31 am
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 5:29 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:26 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:30 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:27 pm
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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:34 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 5:03 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 7:07 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 8:53 pm
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