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This is a writer's guild where all can gather for feedback and advice on all mediums of writing. Plus it's a great place for conversation. 

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Silence Is The Curse of A Tomorrow Never Was

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x___S h i a l e e

PostPosted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 10:48 pm
Silence Is the Curse of A Tomorrow Never Was

The frozen cold crescendo
engulfing four-count prayers,
smothering the twinkle of a fairy's glissando.

The teardrops of the strings
trembling across black and white keys.
Echos of broken songs.
Blood of the purest night,
untainted, tinted
by unfaithful locks
and five-digit melodies.

Dance, dance; swing, swing.
Kiss of flowers drizzling
upon a ballet of water rising.

Waves that rage and multiply --
wingless dreams can touch the sky.

Queen of roses embracing a flood of fire,
death is the disclaimer of the moonlit lyre.

See not the dancers; hear not the silence.


------------------------
I strike again. Get your critique canes ready~!
This one was done at school a while back, the theme is music. rofl
As you can tell... my style is not very organized. I like my poems to swing than rock -- if you get the imagery. x]
Rhyming is addicting.  
PostPosted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 11:19 pm
wow
everyone here is so good at abstract poetry crying
I loved the imagery you used and my favorite part was the last night.  

Kasi Karra


Serenity Reed
Crew

PostPosted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 1:58 pm
I'm not good at it. xp  
PostPosted: Mon Sep 22, 2008 5:52 pm
...

This is more episodic than my own... blaugh

Quote:
five-digit melodies


I think you meant five-stepped melodies? or five-scaled melodies? Digit is ... odd.

Quote:
wingless dreams can touch the sky


I keep want to replace can with that, but I'm a big fan of parallelism. So this is not a biggie.

Anyway, nice, nice, very nice.  

Chrysanthemum Moon


KirbyVictorious

PostPosted: Tue Sep 23, 2008 9:13 am
Dear Goddess that was beautiful O.o

I loved the blood part, and the music part, and the last line. Question though: why did those two couplets rhyme when the rest did not?  
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Infinite possibilities-A writer's guild

 
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